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Jack Nicklaus

Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, you're the best.

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Adrienne Vittadini

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Handles Bermuda

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Luggage Canada

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Trash Bag

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Fitration Bags

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Golf Tees Lament

Golf tees on my dresser
Golf tees in my bed
Golf tees on my pillows
Where they poke me in my head

Golf tees in my closet
Falling from my shirts and pants
Golf tees along the baseboards
Just like army ants

Golf tees in the carpet
And underneath my feet
Golf tees lined up on the mantle
Oh, they look so neat

Golf tees in my couch
And in my back and thighs
When I sit and watch TV
I feel those little guys

Golf tees in the kitchen
In Jurassic coffee mugs
Sometimes when I pass them
They look like prehistoric bugs.

Golf tees in the bathtub
Like sailors on plastic ships
Golf tee in her make-up
Like little bald q-tips.

Golf tees in the attic
Golf tees in the shed
Golf tees, golf tees everywhere
I wonder where they bred?

Golf tees out the backdoor
Like Hansel-and-Gretel’s trails
Golf tees in the flowerbeds
Among the mulch and snails

Golf tees in my car
And underneath the mats
Golf tees in the backseat
Like little baseball bats

But when I am at the golf course
I ask my partner, like a louse…
“May I borrow some of your tees? ”
I left mine at the house!

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I Cant Win

(l. johnson/d. richardson/c. knight)
Ive been trying so hard to find a way to your heart
I cant win, I cant win, I cant win, I cant win
Win your love, win your love
I gave you my love, I gave you my heart
Instead of taking it, keeping it, baby, you tore it apart
But I cant win, I cant win, I cant win, no, I cant win
Win your love, win your love
I go to church every sunday [and there aint nothing wrong with that]
I stand work on time, every monday [i do the best I can]
I cant win, I cant win, I cant win, oh, no, I cant win
Win your love,
Cant seem to win your love, baby
Win your love
No matter how hard I try
Win your love, cant win your love, baby
Win your love, oh-hoo, I cant win
I just cant win, baby
I cant win
I try hard enough, girl
I cant win, I still cant win
I work eight days a week, baby
What more, what more you want me to do ?
Im down on my knees, baby, I do that
I cant win, please, please, please
Just cant seem to win your love
Come on, and bring it to me, girl
Win your love, win your love

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Soccer Rollback

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Veterinary Camps

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Im Gonna Win

Another dark night, in the city
And my prospects lookin thin
The survival, of the fittest
Is the law, in the world that I live in
I was not born, to be a fighter
But nows the time I have to learn
To keep my head, above the water
Gotta play with fire, but not get burned
I gotta stand up, I gotta face it
Dont want to lose it
I want to taste it while its hot
Dont want to waste it, I need it so bad
Im gonna win, yeah
Im gonna win
You see its a matter of pride
Deep down inside
Im gonna win, yeah
Im gonna win
I got no time, to sit and wonder
I got myself, to reckon with
Yeah and life wont drag me under
Even if it takes, all I have to give
Ill give it all
I gotta stand up, I gotta face it
Dont want to lose it
Ooh I want to taste it while its hot
Dont want to waste it, my minds made up
Im gonna win
Im gonna win
I tell you, see when it comes down to the crunch
Ive gotta beat life to the punch
Im gonna win
Somehow I know Im gonna win
You know
Ive got to fight to stay alive
Kick it in to overdrive
Im gonna win, ooh, ooh, ooh
Im gonna win
Im gonna win
Im gonna win
You see its a matter of pride
Deep down inside
Im gonna win
Gonna win, gonna win
Ooh, Ill pay the price
Gonna win
No more mr. nice
Gonna win
Hey, just watch me roll the dice
Im gonna win, win, win

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Healthy Back Bag

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What's In It For Me?

THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE HAVE TIME FOR TWITTER AND FACEBOOK, BUT NONE FOR THEMSELVES OR OTHERS,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE HAVE A HUNDRED 'FRIENDS' ON FACEBOOK,
BUT NOT EVEN TEN IN REAL LIFE
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE EMOTE WITH EMOTICONS BUT NOT WITH THEIR FACES,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE PREFER TO WRITE 'LOL' RATHER THAN ACTUALLY LAUGHING OUT LOUD,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE LOVE THEIR COMPUTER MORE THAN THEIR FRIENDS,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE LIVE THEIR LIVES MORE ONLINE THAN OFF IT,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE CAN SPOT THE ERROR IN SOMEONE'S TYPING BUT CANNOT SPOT A TEAR IN A FRIEND'S EYE,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE CAN GROW ANY CROP ONLINE BUT CANNOT EVEN PICK UP A SPADE IN REAL LIFE,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE RELISH THE FOOD AT MCDONALDS AND DOMINOS, BUT CRIB OVER HOME COOKED FOOD,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE ARE READY TO KILL FOR A FEW SHREDS OF PAPER,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE KILL IN THE NAME OF RELIGION,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE A MAN IS READY TO KILL HIS BROTHER OVER PROPERTY AND MONEY,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE THE VALUE OF MONEY IS MORE THAN THE VALUE OF LIFE,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE LIVING A LIFE IS TOUGHER THAN KILLING A LIFE,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE IT'S EASIER TO EARN MONEY BY CHEATING THAN BY WORKING HONESTLY,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE THE VALUE OF A GIFT IS THROUGH ITS PRICE AND NOT ITS EMOTIONS,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE THE MEASURE OF A MAN IS THROUGH HIS CAR AND HOUSE RATHER THAN HIS CHARACTER,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE LOVE THEIR POSSESSIONS MORE THAN THEIR FRIENDS AND PARENTS,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE THINGS ARE LOVED AND PEOPLE ARE USED,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD WHERE PEOPLE DO ANYTHING FOR A BETTER PAY BUT NOTHING FOR A BETTER CONSCIENCE,
EVEN IF I WIN THIS WORLD WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?
THE WORLD IS BAD AND I KNOW THAT BUT SILL IF I WIN THIS WORLD,
WHAT'S IN IT FOR ME?

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Twin State

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You Cant Win

(from the wiz)
You cant win
You cant break even
And you cant get out of the game
People kee sayin
Things are gonna change
But they look us like
Youre stayin the same
You cant win
Get over your head
And you only have yourself to blame
You cant win chile
(you cant win chile)
You aint break even
And you cant get out of the game
You cant win
The world keeps movin
And youre standin far behind
People keep sayin
Thingsll get better
(just to ease your state of mind)
(so you lean back, and you smoke that smoke)
(and you drink your glass of wine)
So you cant win, chile
You cant break even
And you cant get out of the game
You cant win, you cant win no way
If your story stays the same
(you aint winnin),
No, no,
(but its nice to see you)
(Im awfully glad you came)
(better cool it cause
It aint abour losin)
Then the world has got no shame
You cant win, chile
You cant break even
You cant get out of the game
You cant win
You cant break even
Aint the way its supposed to be
(youll be spendin),
No, no
(your little bit of money)
While someone else rides for free
(learn your lesson), ooh,
(refuel your mind)
(before someone blows out your flame)
You cant win, chile. no!
You cant win

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You Win, I Win, We Lose

(kenny chesney/buddy brock/donny kees)
Nothing left, no regrets
No hard feelings wish you all the best
No blame, no shame
Just time to say its over I guess
We both agree its the right thing
The only thing left to do
You win, I win, we lose
Sometimes love dont work out
No matter how hard you try
Lord knows we didnt start out to say goodbye
If its a win-win situation
Then why am I feelin so blue
You win, I win, we lose
You take yours, Ill take mine
Well leave nothing but the memories behind
Of a love, and a dream
That just somehow faded with time
You say youre goin your way
Im goin somewhere too
You win, I win, we lose
Sometimes love dont work out
No matter how hard you try
Lord knows we didnt start out to say goodbye
If its a win-win situation
Then why am I feelin so blue
You win, I win, we lose
If its a win-win situation
Then why am I feelin so blue
You win, I win, we lose
If you win, and I win, we lose
We lose

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LPGA (Is Racism On The Ladies Pro Tour?)

Will someone please say it’s a rumor and not true,
That professional woman’s golf is not going to,
Require that players who play in any LPGA events,
Have to speak English or back home they are sent.

Wow! Why not take the lead of the PGA men’s side?
When Tiger Woods emerged did others run and hide?
No! They practiced, worked out and hired coaches,
As brighter lights shined some women hid like roaches.

2009 from September 7, is just over 100 days away,
It takes years to learn English unless sports you play,
Basketball, football, baseball are a few that come to mind,
The Ladies Profession Golf Association is ahead, not behind.

Many ex-players are making the adjustment to play by play,
Far from the days when, “you know” was all they could say,
But, this progress has taken decades and now you expect,
Better golfers to learn proficient English just to get a check?

What’s happened to competition, head to head with the best?
Do we have to wait for another Olympics to put skill to the test?
I though only in politics via the cold war did this stuff exist,
Now thesportof women’s golf is going be added to the list.

Sports is an activity governed by a set of competitive rules,
Not to be goverend by where you did or did not go to school,
Going from one country to another you don’t need a visa to play,
Just a passport, there is no test as to what you can or cannot say.

True, not every country like our United States has free speech,
However, you need not be fluent in the local just to compete,
Playing against the world’s best is what makes golf so sweet,
Not sending them home because youre tired of getting beat.

I know this is not all the players only a handful of spoiled quitters,
Sometimes is seems as though a few caddies are also baby sitters,
The one and only way to be the best is to beat the ones that are,
Who wants to watch a match with winners barely breaking par?

This a demeaning, stupid, selfish, insensitive, bitter, jealous rule,
You become a better golfer by going to UCLA instead of Q school?
I certainly hope this insensitiveness doesn’t too last long or go very far,
Will parking a Taurus next to a S600 Benz make the Ford a better car?

Didn’t the word golf mean, “Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden? ”
Now it’s the ladies who are trying to keep the best players hidden?
OK, hide your mama, jewelry, money, Picasso, Rembrandt or Monet,
But don’t hide the best foreign players by not allowing them to play.

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University Of Central Florida Volleyball

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A Time To Feel Forlorn and Reconstruct What's Torn

There's a designated time in the universe for everything:

A time to limit, a time to expand.
A time to rise, time to lower and lend a hand.

A time to maintain, a time to abandon.
A time to develop, a time to rest at random.

A time to communicate, a time for silence.
A time to kiss your enemy, a time to concede wins.

A time to spite, a time to please.
A time for respite, a time to tease.

A time to process, a time to confess.
A time to do more. A time to do less.

A time to dominate. A time to captivate.
A time to plunge. A time to resurface straight.

A time to maximise. A time to minimise.
A time to diminish. A time to optimise.

A time to sacrifice. time to insist on rights.
A time to be selfish. A time to be concerned about plights.

A time to be big. A time to be small.
A time to care for a special one. A time to love all.

A time to add dimension. A time to simplify.
A time to advocate egalitarianism.
A time to exult.
A time to default.
A time to be accepting of imperfect humanism.

A time to enhance. A time to simplify.
A time to criticise. A time to dignify.

A time to produce. A time to use.
A time to relent. A time to refuse.

A time to demand. A time to give.
A time to die. a time to live.

A time to survive. A time to admit defeat.
A time to lie. A time to walk on your feet.

A time to compete. A time to not.
A time to remember. A time to concede you forgot.

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For A Round Of Golf

For leisure the game that so many do play
For a round of golf 'tis a beautiful day
By the wide slow flowing river that crawls to the sea
Men and women practice their strokes before their evening tea.

As a boy I believed hobby golfers had easy jobs
And that those who enjoyed golf were well to do snobs
But such antiquated thinking not relevant today
As all kinds of classes the game of golf play.

A beautiful day for a beautiful game
For most hobby golfers with no aspirations to fame
After work they go to the golf course in the evening sun
And play the eighteen holes for the sake of fun.

Of the praises of golf everybody doesn't sing
But for the participants a game without physical contact can be such a fun thing
In the golf course by the river that to the sea crawl
The crack of the iron on the stone hard golf ball.

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Using Boot Camp

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