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You Called Me A Cow

it was an ideal vacation for us all:
a final frolic with three years’ worth of friends
one month before we were scheduled to graduate
and then migrate in opposite directions
we’ll never be together like that again

beautiful weather all five days –
temperatures in the seventies, just enough clouds –
docile waves belly-flopped upon immaculate sand
and the velvet ocean air caressed my slumbering face
as I awoke every mellow morning
what an auspicious way to start a day!

my friend and I chatted as we tanned ivory bodies
sprawled across a clean hotel-owned sheet
shamelessly wallowing in delicious laziness
so eager to embrace the long-absent sun

in short, I was perfectly content
for the first time in months

my friend and I attacked the waves
thrashing, shouting, laughing
breathless as we emerged
a droplet beaded on each little hair
and the salt beginning to bake into our skin

our eyes met as I was returning to my beach towel
and I know from bitter experience
that your malignant glare can result in no good
my head has an instinct to drop, my shoulders to hunch
when I find myself in your sinister presence

nudging your closest minion in his visible ribs,
you pointed directly at me and uttered a “moo”
loud enough that all the heads around us turned
and ripped me to pieces with their condescending eyes

with tears stinging my ocean-dehydrated eyes,
I could not have been more vulnerable

if I were beautiful, I would have laughed you off the beach
I wasn’t humiliated because you called me a cow
I was humiliated because you plundered my felicity
by forcing me to publicly accept a harsh reality
I do such a fine job of denying

I am not an attractive person by any standard
these wide, pudgy cheeks and this sagging chin
give my head the unfortunate shape

[...] Read more

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