Martian Sestina
I wanted to find my own get away,
My vacation somewhere far from the world.
I could imaging twinkling lights like stars,
So bright and blinding my disappointment,
Separating me from my thoughts, myself,
And my neurotic, despondent feelings.
In my gut, I have uneasy feelings—
Stirring and churning. They won't go away.
I'm trapped in my chair. I'm trapped in myself.
I'm trapped underneath the weight of this world.
I need to clear all the disappointment-
I'll tilt my head and look to the stars.
Out of my window, the lights are stars,
A celestial glimmer—I'm feeling
The gravity of my disappointment
Pulling me down and dragging me away.
I'm crushing from the pressures of the world.
I'm pressed so flat that I'm barely myself.
Yet, I hover so high above myself,
Dangling in the sky beside all the stars.
I think I've been a tourist of this world.
I've had this suspicion, this weird feeling
That I used to belong so far away,
So far from this constant disappointment.
I'm disappointed by disappointment,
The way I can't be happy for myself.
I believe better things are far away—
They wait for me to wish upon their star.
It's a sad, worrisome sort of feeling,
But I can't help my distance from the world.
It seems to me that I'm lost in the world,
Lost in the shroud of my disappointment.
In my daze, I am numbed to all feeling.
I don't know anything about myself
Except the escapist pings that the stars
Suggest. I'm not home. I've been far away.
I'm feeling so alone, far from my world.
Can I get away from disappointment
Wondering about myself and the stars?
poem by Tim Stensloff
Added by Poetry Lover
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