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Blessed To Be Cursed

I awaken early,
With thoughts that seem...
Already out of date.
Already out of time.
Already...
I feel I am too late.

Bombarded I am,
With images that feed.
And some I feel,
I am not yet ready to taste.

Am I cursed or blessed?
At times I feel in between.
And aging hasn't made this attraction,
Any easier for me...
It seems.

Am I cursed or blessed?
OR blessed to be cursed?
Is it possible to enjoy something,
And not quench that thirst?

I awaken early,
With thoughts that seem...
Already out of date.
Already out of time.
Already...
I feel I am too late.

Bombarded I am,
With images that feed.
And some I feel,
I am not yet ready to taste...
Although I enjoy,
Achieving those impossible dreams.

Am I cursed or blessed?
OR blessed to be cursed?
Is it possible to enjoy something,
And not quench that thirst?

And I think to myself...
'What am I getting out of this?
How am I benefitting,
When I am the last to think of myself first! '

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