My Dark Side
Years of love tainted in the hatred of a minute
Mother will never come to terms,
With the demons that charm me
Darker sides of myself,
I can neither explain nor avoid
Not even I can fully comprehend
This impulsive obsession
This violent transgression
This hypnotic possession
It prods at my heart with pinprick-sized swords
Leaving small scars
And a cavity of evil
It rules over my senses
Like an ecstasy drug
Leaving a dreadful hangover
And a grocery list of lies
Prayers can't seem to overcome
This war I've forged
Beating on battle drums
I invoke the Holy Spirit
And receive a vortex of emptiness
Clasping palms together,
I'm begging God! See!
Please wash away this conniving side to me,
I want to be 'good'!
I try with all my might
But no matter how hard I cry
I'm losing this fight
Mother, she loves me
Biologically forced to
But if I was a lone beggar on her street,
I know what she would do
Oh Lord what tribulations,
Brew inside this frame!
Jesus, take pity on those who love you,
For I exalt your name
Don't just make mother listen
Allow her to understand!
Send me an admonition,
Tell me, Lord,
What is your plan?
[...] Read more
poem by Gabrielle Fleming
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