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Under fire at home

At times your were extremely happy
and impulsive, sometimes morose,
withdrawn or suicidal
trying to hide from the world
or sometimes even aggressive.

Your Manic-Depressive Psychosis
needed a scapegoat
to whip, to burn with molten plastic,
to cut and stab with a knife
and to shoot at with a gun.

You told me
that you had cheated me
with another man
while I was busy
with the computer
and smashed your heels down
on some software
breaking compact disks and started
kicking at the SCSI drives
of the computer.

I got really angry and told you
that in my eyes
you were nothing more
than an unpaid whore.

You didn’t say anything at this
and walked to the bedroom
and I went to the bathroom
to brush my teeth
and get ready for bed.

I have never been closer to death
than when you (my now ex-wife)
with my 9 mm pistol
fired right through
the bathroom door.

Five shots rang out
and the magazine
had nine more
and the bullets were hollow point
and nickel-tipped mixed
and automatically I kept score.

It’s another thing
to be fired upon
by the enemy in war,

[...] Read more

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