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A modern civilization is only possible when it is accepted that singular beings exist and express themselves freely.

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Modern Dancing

Modern, modern, modern, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern
I see you acting modernly with the boys and girls
Exposure breeds discovery in the modern world
The 60's hairdos 90's eyes are just flashing lights
A touch of neon hinting class for the modern night
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern
Mono vision tv face and determined eyes
The clothes are perfect the rips in place just the perfect size
Familiarity breeds contempt but it doesn't show
We've heard the music times before but it still makes you go
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, modern dancing
Modern dancing, dancing
....variations to fade....

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Anything Is Possible

Anything is possible
If you put your mind to it
Anything is possible
Just put your mind to it
Anything is possible
If you put your mind to it
Anything....
Is possible
Verse 1:
Thought I couldnt slow him down
Long enough to look my way
Thought he was out of my league
Wouldnt give me time of day
Thought he was like all the rest
Love her, leave her, no remorse
But I guess that I misjudged
And this thing just ran its course
He taught me
Chorus:
Anything is possible
If you put your mind to it
Anything is possible...
Just put your mind to it
Anything is possible
If you put your mind to it
Anything is possible
Break it down now.....
No matter what it is, its possible
Say, anything is possible
(anything...) no matter what it is, its possible
Say, anything is possible
(anything...) no matter what it is, its possible
Say, anything is possible
(anything...) no matter what it is, its possible
Say, anything is possible
Verse 2:
Much to my surprise I felt
A warm, not cold vibe
When he looked in my eyes
(oh yeah, its possible)
His bad boy front not charm
Was his disguise
Oh whoa whoa
(let me tell ya)
He read so much into me
Listened so attentively
He liked me, I rest my case
Wasnt just a pretty face
Bridge:
If you set your mind

[...] Read more

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Trans-Europe Express

Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Rendezvous on Champs-Elysees
Leave Paris in the morning on T.E.E.
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
In Vienna we sit in a late-night cafe
Straight connection, T.E.E.
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
From station to station
back to Dusseldorf City
Meet Iggy Pop and David Bowie
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express
Trans-Europe Express

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Upon the lap of Nature

A lonesome bird
A whispering wind
A solitary cloud,
Nature is a singular scene.

A running brook
Gushing falls
Breathing woods,
Nature is a singular voice.

Endless meads
Dancing shades
A grazing cow
Nature is a singular vision.

A ploughman’s call
A melodious song
A barking dog,
Nature is a singular pulse.

A twinkling star
A silent night
A burning candle,
Nature is a singular moment.

A blossoming bud
A blissful moment
A graceful heart,
Nature is a singular mould.

A different season
A different mood
A changing hue
Nature is a singular feel.

Nature’s themes are endless,
Variety simply countless
Yet, the impact is singular,
Thy pulses are thine alone.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

What is actually this Nature? Nature is our own living core. When we are on the lap of Nature, we are within our reflections. We are born out of this Nature and finally return to her elements. We owe our bodily and mental existence to these gross and subtle elements of nature. We are in eternal communion with her either consciously or unconsciously. Our core is peace and solitude. The rest is all a forced mask. This is why we turn to Nature now and then for an all round refreshment. A twinkling star, a flying bird, a passing wind, a running brook, a falling leaf, a burning candle, a silent night, a sailing cloud, a grazing cow… these present moments of glory in our life. They all represent the philosophy of our life. They boost our mental battery because on the lap of Nature, our thoughts gradually disappear and we become contemplative and meditative. Everybody needs this tonic. Nature is a beautiful lass. Nature is a good philosopher too. Let us open our eyes and ears and be ready for a floating experience!

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Modern Dance

Maybe I should go and live in amsterdam
In a side street near a big canal
Spend my evenings in the van gogh museum
What a dream, van gogh museum
Maybe its time to see tangiers
A different life-style, some different fears
And maybe I should be in edinburgh
In a kilt in edinburgh
Doin a modern dance
Doin a modern dance
Or maybe I should get a farm in southern france
Where the winds are wispy and the villagers dance
And you and I wed sleep beneath a moon
Moon in june and sleep till noon
And maybe you and I could fall in love
Regain the spirit that we once had
Youd let me hold you and touch the night
That shines so bright, so bright with fright
Doin a modern dance
Doin a modern dance
Shit, maybe I could go to yucatan
Where women are women, a mans a man
Ah, no one confused, ever loses place
With their place in the human race
Maybe Im not cut out for city life
The smell of exhaust, the smell of strife
And maybe you dont wanna be a wife
Its not a life being a wife
Doin a modern dance
Doin a modern dance
So maybe I should go to tanganyika
Where the rivers run, down mountains tall and steep
Or go to india to study chants
And lose romance to a mantras dance
I need a guru, I need some law
Explain to me the things we saw
Why it always comes to this
Its all downhill after the first kiss
Maybe I should move to rotterdam
Maybe move to amsterdam
I should move to ireland, italy, spain
Afghanistan where there is no rain
Or maybe I should just learn a modern dance
Where roles are shifting the modern dance
You never touch you dont know who youre with
This week, this month, this time of year
This week, this month, this time of year
Doin a modern dance
You dont know who youre with modern dance
I should move to pakistan, go to afghanistan

[...] Read more

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The Impossible and the Possible.

Poem Title: The struggle to overcome the difference between the Impossible and the Possible
Acrostic Poem 166a

The struggle to overcome the difference between the impossible and the possible.
Hope being the word that springs to mind to link these two opposites to attract.
Eternally wandering Cyber space side by side hooking onto every adjective or verb.

Seeking Impossible causes to take away excuses and make them once more possible.
To overcome the bigoted, blind, self centred mind set of the un-believers.
Reaching corners of the mind that you of Christian or Muslim Faith never thought existed.
Unless you have spent all your life on earth in a cocoon not within real time.
God has chosen you to teach the differences between the Impossible and Possible.
Given that if at first you don`t succeed... You`ll get it right next time.
Love for all your Fellow Men and Women may seem Impossible. Trust me it`s the only way.
Every possibility, has been at sometime within it`s life...seemed Impossible.

Take the making of a silk purse from one sows ear. If you will
Or the finding of a needle in a hay-stack or the abolition of third world hunger and the like.

Or the creation of the Love of Nation unto Nation... The end to all War or domination
Very nearly every single problem has a solution, indeed sometimes many solutions do exist.
Electricity, how unbelievable to the even the wisest man once upon a time thought “impossible”
Radio waves converted into the sweetest sounds ever heard by mortal Man
Communication instant Chat across the Globe in real time ….one to one...”Impossible”
Of loving commitment between different creeds and cultures without ever meeting possible.
Mighty soon God will look down on earth and see the two words rolled into one!
Entreating the Impossible always Possible and the Possible never Impossible.

The struggle to overcome the difference between the Impossible and the Possible.
Holy Holy Holy, Eureka, Glory be! We are getting there, I do believe I really do believe.
Eternally where two Poets or more can get together to speak as one, in one Like-minded.

Difference between the Impossible and the Possible are reduced to nil
In practical terms every metaphor, rhetoric, noun or verb or adjective can be polished.
From the most impossible dream into the possible reality of the finest prose ever written.
From the dullest of dyslectic mutterings to the most flowery of sweetest love songs.
Endlessly tripping from the lips of stranger meeting stranger, wisest verse ever heard.
Re-acting opposites attracting the Impossible with the Possible. Judge for yourselves.
Enacting with the humble Poet that composed this message. You may never chance to meet.
Never in a Thousand years of trying, these chances, sure don't happen every day.
Catch the Impossible catch on the very boundaries of your mind to make a difference.
Every chance that one single catch will win your team the Game.

By making then the Impossible Possible, you have changed in one action the life you have.
Every Impossible thought can then be dismissed from your mind possibly forever
The sun to leave the sky, the rivers all run dry, a baby not to cry ….Impossible.
We have that song within our mind, which keeps our feet upon the ground
Every now and then to be able to accept that all things are not Possible.

[...] Read more

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Express Yourself

(she takes him in her arms,
She kisses his face on the lips)
(one woman in the world,
One woman in many faces)
(she takes him in her arms,
She kisses his face on the lips)
Dont go for second best baby
Put your love to the test
You know, you know, youve got to
Make her express how she feels
And maybe then youll know your love is real
You dont need diamond rings
Or eighteen karat gold
Fancy cars that go very fast
You know they never last, no, no
What you need is a big strong hand
To lift you to your higher ground
Make you feel like a king on a throne
Make her love you till you cant come down
Dont go for second best baby
Put your love to the test
You know, you know, youve got to
Make her express how she feels
Then youll know your love is real
(one woman in the world,
One woman in many faces)
Long stem roses are the way to your heart
But she needs to start with your head
Satin sheets are very romantic
What happens when youre not in bed
You deserve the best in life
So if the time isnt right then move on
Second best is never enough
Youll do much better baby on your own
Dont go for second best baby
Put your love to the test
You know, you know, youve got to
Make her express how she feels
Then youll know your love is real
Express yourself
Youve got to make her
Express herself
Hey, hey, hey, hey
So if you want it right now, make her show you how
Express what shes got, oh baby ready or not
And when youre gone she might regret it
And think about the love she once had
Try to carry on, but she just wont get it
Shell be back on her knees
To express herself

[...] Read more

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Modern Girl

Shes a modern girl
Out to rule the world
And nothing can stop her now
She knows what she wants
And shes out to get it
Shes a modern girl
Life is hard in a midlands town
For a girl with her head in the clouds
Everybody puts her down
Shes just one of the crowd
She finds it aint easy
To stand on her own two feet
It aint easy
She knows this time she wont be beat
Shes a modern girl
Out to rule the world
And nothing can stop her now
She knows what she wants
And shes out to get it
Shes a modern girl
Now its time for her to find
The way its always been
Love is just a word to her
Another broken dream
She finds it aint easy
To stand on her own two feet
It aint easy
She knows this time she wont be beat
Shes a modern girl
Out to rule the world
And nothing can stop her now
She knows what she wants
And shes out to get it
Shes a modern girl
[instrumental]
She finds it aint easy
To stand on her own two feet
It aint easy
She knows this time she wont be beat
Shes a modern girl
Out to rule the world
And nothing can stop her now
She knows what she wants
And shes out to get it
Shes a modern girl
Shes a modern girl
Out to rule the world
And nothing can stop her now
She knows what she wants
And shes out to get it

[...] Read more

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Tibetan Prayer

'om mani padme hung,
om mani padme hung...'

may all beings be freed from suffering.
may all beings breathe as one.
may all beings live in peace.
may all beings learn to give.
may all beings walk in unity.
may all beings walk in forgiveness.
may all beings lay down their weapons.
may all beings be fed and have shelter.
may all beings know they are loved.
may all beings join hands.
may all beings live in awareness.
may all beings be freed from suffering.

'om mani padme hung,
om mani padme hung...'

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Jack Kerouac

The Scripture of the Golden Eternity

1
Did I create that sky? Yes, for, if it was anything other than a conception in my mind I wouldnt have said 'Sky'-That is why I am the golden eternity. There are not two of us here, reader and writer, but one, one golden eternity, One-Which-It-Is, That-Which- Everything-Is.

2
The awakened Buddha to show the way, the chosen Messiah to die in the degradation of sentience, is the golden eternity. One that is what is, the golden eternity, or, God, or, Tathagata-the name. The Named One. The human God. Sentient Godhood. Animate Divine. The Deified One. The Verified One. The Free One. The Liberator. The Still One. The settled One. The Established One. Golden Eternity. All is Well. The Empty One. The Ready One. The Quitter. The Sitter. The Justified One. The Happy One.

3
That sky, if it was anything other than an illusion of my mortal mind I wouldnt have said 'that sky.' Thus I made that sky, I am the golden eternity. I am Mortal Golden Eternity.

4
I was awakened to show the way, chosen to die in the degradation of life, because I am Mortal Golden Eternity.

5
I am the golden eternity in mortal animate form.

6
Strictly speaking, there is no me, because all is emptiness. I am empty, I am non-existent. All is bliss.

7
This truth law has no more reality than the world.

8
You are the golden eternity because there is no me and no you, only one golden eternity.

9
The Realizer. Entertain no imaginations whatever, for the thing is a no-thing. Knowing this then is Human Godhood.

10
This world is the movie of what everything is, it is one movie, made of the same stuff throughout, belonging to nobody, which is what everything is.

11
If we were not all the golden eternity we wouldnt be here. Because we are here we cant help being pure. To tell man to be pure on account of the punishing angel that punishes the bad and the rewarding angel that rewards the good would be like telling the water 'Be Wet'-Never the less, all things depend on supreme reality, which is already established as the record of Karma earned-fate.

12
God is not outside us but is just us, the living and the dead, the never-lived and never-died. That we should learn it only now, is supreme reality, it was written a long time ago in the archives of universal mind, it is already done, there's no more to do.

13
This is the knowledge that sees the golden eternity in all things, which is us, you, me, and which is no longer us, you, me.

14
What name shall we give it which hath no name, the common eternal matter of the mind? If we were to call it essence, some might think it meant perfume, or gold, or honey. It is not even mind. It is not even discussible, groupable into words; it is not even endless, in fact it is not even mysterious or inscrutably inexplicable; it is what is; it is that; it is this. We could easily call the golden eternity 'This.' But 'what's in a name?' asked Shakespeare. The golden eternity by another name would be as sweet. A Tathagata, a God, a Buddha by another name, an Allah, a Sri Krishna, a Coyote, a Brahma, a Mazda, a Messiah, an Amida, an Aremedeia, a Maitreya, a Palalakonuh, 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 would be as sweet. The golden eternity is X, the golden eternity is A, the golden eternity is /\, the golden eternity is O, the golden eternity is [ ], the golden eternity is t-h-e-g-o-l-d-e-n-e-t-e-r- n-i-t-y. In the beginning was the word; before the beginning, in the beginningless infinite neverendingness, was the essence. Both the word 'god' and the essence of the word, are emptiness. The form of emptiness which is emptiness having taken the form of form, is what you see and hear and feel right now, and what you taste and smell and think as you read this. Wait awhile, close your eyes, let your breathing stop three seconds or so, listen to the inside silence in the womb of the world, let your hands and nerve-ends drop, re-recognize the bliss you forgot, the emptiness and essence and ecstasy of ever having been and ever to be the golden eternity. This is the lesson you forgot.

15
The lesson was taught long ago in the other world systems that have naturally changed into the empty and awake, and are here now smiling in our smile and scowling in our scowl. It is only like the golden eternity pretending to be smiling and scowling to itself; like a ripple on the smooth ocean of knowing. The fate of humanity is to vanish into the golden eternity, return pouring into its hands which are not hands. The navel shall receive, invert, and take back what'd issued forth; the ring of flesh shall close; the personalities of long dead heroes are blank dirt.

16
The point is we're waiting, not how comfortable we are while waiting. Paleolithic man waited by caves for the realization of why he was there, and hunted; modern men wait in beautified homes and try to forget death and birth. We're waiting for the realization that this is the golden eternity.

17
It came on time.

[...] Read more

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Trans Europa Express

Trans Europa Express
Trans Europa Express
Trans Europa Express
Trans Europa Express
Rendez-vous auf den Champs Elysees
Verlass Paris am Morgen mit dem TEE
Trans Europa Express
Trans Europa Express
Trans Europa Express
Trans Europa Express
In Wien sitzen wir im Nachtcafe
Direkt Verbindung TEE
Trans Europa Express
Trans Europa Express
Trans Europa Express
Trans Europa Express
Wir laufen 'rein in Duesseldorf City
Und treffen Iggy Pop und David Bowie

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Modern Girl

Once a beautiful miss america married mr. right
Had a little baby girl, born on a stormy night
But that was once upon a time, now its a brand new world
Gimme the future, gimme the future, gimme the future with a modern girl
Gimme the future, gimme the future, gimme the future with a modern girl
Somewhere just between the past and somethin dawnin new
Theres a break in the chain, theres a skip in the clock
Girl thats where Im gonna find you
Between the boy I was before and what Im gonna be
Theres a clash on the border, a flame in the sky
Girl thats where youre gonna find me
Cant you hear the planet groanin like a broken down machine
Rusted with the guilty tears of fallen kings and queens
But you and I stand innocent, baby its a brand new world
Gimme the future, gimme the future, gimme the future with a modern girl
Gimme the future, gimme the future, gimme the future with a modern girl
(gimme the future, gimme the future, gimme the future with a modern girl)
Bridge:
Were the son and the daughter on a new freeway
(gimme the future, gimme the future)
Laughin while the road maps blow away
(gimme the future with a modern girl)
Were the son and the daughter and we aint afraid
(gimme the future, gimme the future)
Wont be makin the mistakes our fathers made
(gimme the future with a modern girl)
(gimme the future, gimme the future) oh, gimme the future with a modern girl
(gimme the future, gimme the future) oh, gimme the future with a modern girl
Once a beautiful miss america married mr. right
Had a little baby boy, born on a stormy night
But that was once upon a time, now its a brand new world
Gimme the future, gimme the future - gimme the future with a modern girl...
(repeats out)
(bridge)

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Modern Love

I'm here to keep your lonely nights away
cheek to cheek I dance with you today
And the closer I get, the more I'm obsessed by you
And the further I go, the more I'm obsessed by you
You know that I meant what I said
I wanna see you from above
I wanna be left on the dancefloor
I wanna be the modern love
I'm here to keep your loneliness away
I'll be your drained lover if I may
And the further I go, the more I'm possessed by you
And the closer I get, the more I'm possessed by you
You know that I meant what I said
I wanna see you from above
I wanna be left on the dancefloor
I wanna be the modern love
The modern love
Drag me through the masses by the stage
erotic temptations within range
And the closer we get, the more you're obsessed by me
And the further we go, the more you're obsessed by me
You know that I meant what I said
I wanna see you from above
I wanna be left in the dancehall
I wanna be the modern love
The modern love
The modern love
I wanna be your modern love
The modern love
I wanna be your modern love
I'm the modern love

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Ode to the Modern Work-Man

O, wretched modern work-man
The years, they pass you by
Everything you believe
Is nothing but a lie.

O, wretched modern work-man
From your neckties to your socks
You’re nothing but a slave
To pictures in a box.

O, wretched modern work-man
You live for the Public Eye
Your life is but a parody
Whose foundation is a lie.

O, wretched modern work-man
You strive, and save, and yearn
To keep up with the Kamaus
Spending more than you earn.

O, wretched modern work-man
You’re nothing but a slave
Your dreams are dead and buried
Lying in a shallow grave.

O, wretched modern work-man
You strangled your own dreams
You smothered your own happiness
Your hand stifled its screams.

O, wretched modern work-man
For the camera so aesthetic
Beneath the plastic smile
You’re pitiful and pathetic.

O, wretched modern work-man
You work yourself half to death
Chasing pounds and shillings
To swell another’s wealth.

O, wretched modern work-man
You lived your whole life as a show
Yet the only Watcher who mattered
Didn’t like what He saw.

O, wretched modern work-man
When you finally died
Your surname, and hospital bill
Were all you left behind…

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Is it Possible?

Is it possible
That so high debate,
So sharp, so sore, and of such rate,
Should end so soon and was begun so late?
Is it possible?

Is it possible
So cruel intent,
So hasty heat and so soon spent,
From love to hate, and thence for to relent?
Is it possible?

Is it possible
That any may find
Within one heart so diverse mind,
To change or turn as weather and wind?
Is it possible?

Is it possible
To spy it in an eye
That turns as oft as chance on die,
The truth whereof can any try?
Is it possible?

It is possible
For to turn so oft,
To bring that lowest which was most aloft,
And to fall highest yet to light soft:
It is possible.

All is possible
Whoso list believe.
Trust therefore first, and after preve,
As men wed ladies by licence and leave.
All is possible.

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Is It Possible

Is it possible
That so high debate,
So sharp, so sore, and of such rate,
Should end so soon and was begun so late?
Is it possible?

Is it possible
So cruel intent,
So hasty heat and so soon spent,
From love to hate, and thence for to relent?
Is it possible?

Is it possible
That any may find
Within one heart so diverse mind,
To change or turn as weather and wind?
Is it possible?

Is it possible
To spy it in an eye
That turns as oft as chance on die,
The truth whereof can any try?
Is it possible?

It is possible
For to turn so oft,
To bring that lowest which was most aloft,
And to fall highest yet to light soft:
It is possible.

All is possible
Whoso list believe.
Trust therefore first, and after preve,
As men wed ladies by licence and leave.
All is possible.

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Peace Of Mind

I gotta find peace of mind... I gotta find peace of mind
He says it's impossible...But I know it's possible
He says it's impossible... But I know it's possible
He says there's no me without him... Please help me forget about him
He takes all my energy... Trapped in my memory
Constantly holding me... Constantly holding me
I need to tell you all... All the pain he's caused mmmmm
I need to tell you I'm... I'm undone because mmmmmm
He says it's impossible... But I know it's possible
He says it's impossible without him... But I know it's possible
To finally be in love... And know the real meaning of
A lasting relationship... Not based on ownership
I trust every part of u.... Cause all that you say you do
You love me despite myself
Sometimes I... I fight myself
I just can't believe that you.... Would have anything to do
With someone so insecure... Someone so immature
Ohh you inspire me, to be the higher me
You make my desire pure... You make my desire pure
Just tell me what to say... I can't find the words to say
Please don't be mad with me... I have no identity
All that I've known is gone... All I was building on
I wanna walk wit you, how do I talk to you?
Touch my mouth with your hands... Touch my mouth with your hands
Oh I wanna understand the meaning of your embrace
I know now I have to face... The temptations of my past
Please don't let me disgrace... where my devotion lays
Now that I know the thruth... Now that it's no excuse
Keeping me from your love... What was I thinking of
Holding me from your love... What was I thinking of
You are my peace of mind... That old me is left behind
You are my peace of mind... That old me is left behind
He says it's impossible... but I know it's possible
He says it's improbable... but I know it's tangible
He says it's not grabbable... but I know it's haveable
Cause anything's possible... Cause anything is possible
Please come free my mind... Please come feed my mind
Can you see my mind ohh... Won't you come free my mind
Oh I know it's possible
Anything, anything, anything, anything, anything.... yeah
Anything, anything, anything, anything, .... yeah
Anything, anything, anything, anything, anything.... yeah
Oh, free... free, free, free your mind
Free... free your mind
Free.. free your mind
Free free free free your mind
Oh, it's so possible... Oh, it's so possible
I'm telling you it's possible... I'm telling you it's possible
Free, free, free....... free, get free now (repeat)
Your my peace of mind... That old me is left behind

[...] Read more

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Berenice by edgar allan poe

MISERY is manifold. The wretchedness of earth is multiform. Overreaching the wide horizon as the rainbow, its hues are as various as the hues of that arch, -as distinct too, yet as intimately blended. Overreaching the wide horizon as the rainbow! How is it that from beauty I have derived a type of unloveliness? -from the covenant of peace a simile of sorrow? But as, in ethics, evil is a consequence of good, so, in fact, out of joy is sorrow born. Either the memory of past bliss is the anguish of to-day, or the agonies which are have their origin in the ecstasies which might have been.

My baptismal name is Egaeus; that of my family I will not mention. Yet there are no towers in the land more time-honored than my gloomy, gray, hereditary halls. Our line has been called a race of visionaries; and in many striking particulars -in the character of the family mansion -in the frescos of the chief saloon -in the tapestries of the dormitories -in the chiselling of some buttresses in the armory -but more especially in the gallery of antique paintings -in the fashion of the library chamber -and, lastly, in the very peculiar nature of the library's contents, there is more than sufficient evidence to warrant the belief.

The recollections of my earliest years are connected with that chamber, and with its volumes -of which latter I will say no more. Here died my mother. Herein was I born. But it is mere idleness to say that I had not lived before -that the soul has no previous existence. You deny it? -let us not argue the matter. Convinced myself, I seek not to convince. There is, however, a remembrance of aerial forms -of spiritual and meaning eyes -of sounds, musical yet sad -a remembrance which will not be excluded; a memory like a shadow, vague, variable, indefinite, unsteady; and like a shadow, too, in the impossibility of my getting rid of it while the sunlight of my reason shall exist.

In that chamber was I born. Thus awaking from the long night of what seemed, but was not, nonentity, at once into the very regions of fairy-land -into a palace of imagination -into the wild dominions of monastic thought and erudition -it is not singular that I gazed around me with a startled and ardent eye -that I loitered away my boyhood in books, and dissipated my youth in reverie; but it is singular that as years rolled away, and the noon of manhood found me still in the mansion of my fathers -it is wonderful what stagnation there fell upon the springs of my life -wonderful how total an inversion took place in the character of my commonest thought. The realities of the world affected me as visions, and as visions only, while the wild ideas of the land of dreams became, in turn, -not the material of my every-day existence-but in very deed that existence utterly and solely in itself.

Berenice and I were cousins, and we grew up together in my paternal halls. Yet differently we grew -I ill of health, and buried in gloom -she agile, graceful, and overflowing with energy; hers the ramble on the hill-side -mine the studies of the cloister -I living within my own heart, and addicted body and soul to the most intense and painful meditation -she roaming carelessly through life with no thought of the shadows in her path, or the silent flight of the raven-winged hours. Berenice! -I call upon her name -Berenice! -and from the gray ruins of memory a thousand tumultuous recollections are startled at the sound! Ah! vividly is her image before me now, as in the early days of her light-heartedness and joy! Oh! gorgeous yet fantastic beauty! Oh! sylph amid the shrubberies of Arnheim! -Oh! Naiad among its fountains! -and then -then all is mystery and terror, and a tale which should not be told. Disease -a fatal disease -fell like the simoom upon her frame, and, even while I gazed upon her, the spirit of change swept, over her, pervading her mind, her habits, and her character, and, in a manner the most subtle and terrible, disturbing even the identity of her person! Alas! the destroyer came and went, and the victim -where was she, I knew her not -or knew her no longer as Berenice.

Among the numerous train of maladies superinduced by that fatal and primary one which effected a revolution of so horrible a kind in the moral and physical being of my cousin, may be mentioned as the most distressing and obstinate in its nature, a species of epilepsy not unfrequently terminating in trance itself -trance very nearly resembling positive dissolution, and from which her manner of recovery was in most instances, startlingly abrupt. In the mean time my own disease -for I have been told that I should call it by no other appelation -my own disease, then, grew rapidly upon me, and assumed finally a monomaniac character of a novel and extraordinary form -hourly and momently gaining vigor -and at length obtaining over me the most incomprehensible ascendancy. This monomania, if I must so term it, consisted in a morbid irritability of those properties of the mind in metaphysical science termed the attentive. It is more than probable that I am not understood; but I fear, indeed, that it is in no manner possible to convey to the mind of the merely general reader, an adequate idea of that nervous intensity of interest with which, in my case, the powers of meditation (not to speak technically) busied and buried themselves, in the contemplation of even the most ordinary objects of the universe.

To muse for long unwearied hours with my attention riveted to some frivolous device on the margin, or in the topography of a book; to become absorbed for the better part of a summer's day, in a quaint shadow falling aslant upon the tapestry, or upon the door; to lose myself for an entire night in watching the steady flame of a lamp, or the embers of a fire; to dream away whole days over the perfume of a flower; to repeat monotonously some common word, until the sound, by dint of frequent repetition, ceased to convey any idea whatever to the mind; to lose all sense of motion or physical existence, by means of absolute bodily quiescence long and obstinately persevered in; -such were a few of the most common and least pernicious vagaries induced by a condition of the mental faculties, not, indeed, altogether unparalleled, but certainly bidding defiance to anything like analysis or explanation.

Yet let me not be misapprehended. -The undue, earnest, and morbid attention thus excited by objects in their own nature frivolous, must not be confounded in character with that ruminating propensity common to all mankind, and more especially indulged in by persons of ardent imagination. It was not even, as might be at first supposed, an extreme condition or exaggeration of such propensity, but primarily and essentially distinct and different. In the one instance, the dreamer, or enthusiast, being interested by an object usually not frivolous, imperceptibly loses sight of this object in a wilderness of deductions and suggestions issuing therefrom, until, at the conclusion of a day dream often replete with luxury, he finds the incitamentum or first cause of his musings entirely vanished and forgotten. In my case the primary object was invariably frivolous, although assuming, through the medium of my distempered vision, a refracted and unreal importance. Few deductions, if any, were made; and those few pertinaciously returning in upon the original object as a centre. The meditations were never pleasurable; and, at the termination of the reverie, the first cause, so far from being out of sight, had attained that supernaturally exaggerated interest which was the prevailing feature of the disease. In a word, the powers of mind more particularly exercised were, with me, as I have said before, the attentive, and are, with the day-dreamer, the speculative.

My books, at this epoch, if they did not actually serve to irritate the disorder, partook, it will be perceived, largely, in their imaginative and inconsequential nature, of the characteristic qualities of the disorder itself. I well remember, among others, the treatise of the noble Italian Coelius Secundus Curio 'de Amplitudine Beati Regni dei'; St. Austin's great work, the 'City of God'; and Tertullian 'de Carne Christi, ' in which the paradoxical sentence 'Mortuus est Dei filius; credible est quia ineptum est: et sepultus resurrexit; certum est quia impossibile est' occupied my undivided time, for many weeks of laborious and fruitless investigation.

Thus it will appear that, shaken from its balance only by trivial things, my reason bore resemblance to that ocean-crag spoken of by Ptolemy Hephestion, which steadily resisting the attacks of human violence, and the fiercer fury of the waters and the winds, trembled only to the touch of the flower called Asphodel. And although, to a careless thinker, it might appear a matter beyond doubt, that the alteration produced by her unhappy malady, in the moral condition of Berenice, would afford me many objects for the exercise of that intense and abnormal meditation whose nature I have been at some trouble in explaining, yet such was not in any degree the case. In the lucid intervals of my infirmity, her calamity, indeed, gave me pain, and, taking deeply to heart that total wreck of her fair and gentle life, I did not fall to ponder frequently and bitterly upon the wonder-working means by which so strange a revolution had been so suddenly brought to pass. But these reflections partook not of the idiosyncrasy of my disease, and were such as would have occurred, under similar circumstances, to the ordinary mass of mankind. True to its own character, my disorder revelled in the less important but more startling changes wrought in the physical frame of Berenice -in the singular and most appalling distortion of her personal identity.

During the brightest days of her unparalleled beauty, most surely I had never loved her. In the strange anomaly of my existence, feelings with me, had never been of the heart, and my passions always were of the mind. Through the gray of the early morning -among the trellised shadows of the forest at noonday -and in the silence of my library at night, she had flitted by my eyes, and I had seen her -not as the living and breathing Berenice, but as the Berenice of a dream -not as a being of the earth, earthy, but as the abstraction of such a being-not as a thing to admire, but to analyze -not as an object of love, but as the theme of the most abstruse although desultory speculation. And now -now I shuddered in her presence, and grew pale at her approach; yet bitterly lamenting her fallen and desolate condition, I called to mind that she had loved me long, and, in an evil moment, I spoke to her of marriage.

And at length the period of our nuptials was approaching, when, upon an afternoon in the winter of the year, -one of those unseasonably warm, calm, and misty days which are the nurse of the beautiful Halcyon*, -I sat, (and sat, as I thought, alone,) in the inner apartment of the library. But uplifting my eyes I saw that Berenice stood before me.

*For as Jove, during the winter season, gives twice seven days of warmth, men have called this clement and temperate time the nurse of the beautiful Halcyon -Simonides.

Was it my own excited imagination -or the misty influence of the atmosphere -or the uncertain twilight of the chamber -or the gray draperies which fell around her figure -that caused in it so vacillating and indistinct an outline? I could not tell. She spoke no word, I -not for worlds could I have uttered a syllable. An icy chill ran through my frame; a sense of insufferable anxiety oppressed me; a consuming curiosity pervaded my soul; and sinking back upon the chair, I remained for some time breathless and motionless, with my eyes riveted upon her person. Alas! its emaciation was excessive, and not one vestige of the former being, lurked in any single line of the contour. My burning glances at length fell upon the face.

The forehead was high, and very pale, and singularly placid; and the once jetty hair fell partially over it, and overshadowed the hollow temples with innumerable ringlets now of a vivid yellow, and Jarring discordantly, in their fantastic character, with the reigning melancholy of the countenance. The eyes were lifeless, and lustreless, and seemingly pupil-less, and I shrank involuntarily from their glassy stare to the contemplation of the thin and shrunken lips. They parted; and in a smile of peculiar meaning, the teeth of the changed Berenice disclosed themselves slowly to my view. Would to God that I had never beheld them, or that, having done so, I had died!

The shutting of a door disturbed me, and, looking up, I found that my cousin had departed from the chamber. But from the disordered chamber of my brain, had not, alas! departed, and would not be driven away, the white and ghastly spectrum of the teeth. Not a speck on their surface -not a shade on their enamel -not an indenture in their edges -but what that period of her smile had sufficed to brand in upon my memory. I saw them now even more unequivocally than I beheld them then. The teeth! -the teeth! -they were here, and there, and everywhere, and visibly and palpably before me; long, narrow, and excessively white, with the pale lips writhing about them, as in the very moment of their first terrible development. Then came the full fury of my monomania, and I struggled in vain against its strange and irresistible influence. In the multiplied objects of the external world I had no thoughts but for the teeth. For these I longed with a phrenzied desire. All other matters and all different interests became absorbed in their single contemplation. They -they alone were present to the mental eye, and they, in their sole individuality, became the essence of my mental life. I held them in every light. I turned them in every attitude. I surveyed their characteristics. I dwelt upon their peculiarities. I pondered upon their conformation. I mused upon the alteration in their nature. I shuddered as I assigned to them in imagination a sensitive and sentient power, and even when unassisted by the lips, a capability of moral expression. Of Mad'selle Salle it has been well said, 'que tous ses pas etaient des sentiments, ' and of Berenice I more seriously believed que toutes ses dents etaient des idees. Des idees! -ah here was the idiotic thought that destroyed me! Des idees! -ah therefore it was that I coveted them so madly! I felt that their possession could alone ever restore me to peace, in giving me back to reason.

And the evening closed in upon me thus-and then the darkness came, and tarried, and went -and the day again dawned -and the mists of a second night were now gathering around -and still I sat motionless in that solitary room; and still I sat buried in meditation, and still the phantasma of the teeth maintained its terrible ascendancy as, with the most vivid hideous distinctness, it floated about amid the changing lights and shadows of the chamber. At length there broke in upon my dreams a cry as of horror and dismay; and thereunto, after a pause, succeeded the sound of troubled voices, intermingled with many low moanings of sorrow, or of pain. I arose from my seat and, throwing open one of the doors of the library, saw standing out in the antechamber a servant maiden, all in tears, who told me that Berenice was -no more. She had been seized with epilepsy in the early morning, and now, at the closing in of the night, the grave was ready for its tenant, and all the preparations for the burial were completed.

I found myself sitting in the library, and again sitting there alone. It seemed that I had newly awakened from a confused and exciting dream. I knew that it was now midnight, and I was well aware that since the setting of the sun Berenice had been interred. But of that dreary period which intervened I had no positive -at least no definite comprehension. Yet its memory was replete with horror -horror more horrible from being vague, and terror more terrible from ambiguity. It was a fearful page in the record my existence, written all over with dim, and hideous, and unintelligible recollections. I strived to decypher them, but in vain; while ever and anon, like the spirit of a departed sound, the shrill and piercing shriek of a female voice seemed to be ringing in my ears. I had done a deed -what was it? I asked myself the question aloud, and the whispering echoes of the chamber answered me, 'what was it? '

On the table beside me burned a lamp, and near it lay a little box. It was of no remarkable character, and I had seen it frequently before, for it was the property of the family physician; but how came it there, upon my table, and why did I shudder in regarding it? These things were in no manner to be accounted for, and my eyes at length dropped to the open pages of a book, and to a sentence underscored therein. The words were the singular but simple ones of the poet Ebn Zaiat, 'Dicebant mihi sodales si sepulchrum amicae visitarem, curas meas aliquantulum fore levatas.' Why then, as I perused them, did the hairs of my head erect themselves on end, and the blood of my body become congealed within my veins?

There came a light tap at the library door, and pale as the tenant of a tomb, a menial entered upon tiptoe. His looks were wild with terror, and he spoke to me in a voice tremulous, husky, and very low. What said he? -some broken sentences I heard. He told of a wild cry disturbing the silence of the night -of the gathering together of the household-of a search in the direction of the sound; -and then his tones grew thrillingly distinct as he whispered me of a violated grave -of a disfigured body enshrouded, yet still breathing, still palpitating, still alive!

He pointed to garments; -they were muddy and clotted with gore. I spoke not, and he took me gently by the hand; -it was indented with the impress of human nails. He directed my attention to some object against the wall; -I looked at it for some minutes; -it was a spade. With a shriek I bounded to the table, and grasped the box that lay upon it. But I could not force it open; and in my tremor it slipped from my hands, and fell heavily, and burst into pieces; and from it, with a rattling sound, there rolled out some instruments of dental surgery, intermingled with thirty-two small, white and ivory-looking substances that were scattered to and fro about the floor.

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Conversation with Lord Krishna - VIII (Fiction)

I: Some are engaged in the refurbishing of culture, religion etc., and feel but for them nothing happens and feel they are superior to ordinary folks like me and they many times completely forget You and take credit for all their achievements and also are hijacking Indian culture for selfish purposes. Why are You allowing this and are not ridding them of their illusion and uncultured acts?

Lord Krishna: All actions are inspired by rajo guna. Such persons will have such tendencies. I will enter when they are completely masked by illusion, and I shall do the needful for the society.

I: You said that you know all subjects, skills, fine arts and languages? How is it possible?

Lord Krishna: Know that I am saastra yoni, the womb of all knowledge. Know that I am silence, the essence of all the languages. Languages in the form of meanings, sentences, words and expressions originate and dissolve in silence thus enabling you to know, cognize, perceive, intuit, experience, understand and become knowledgeable, scholars and intellectuals.

I: Numerous sects are available in Hindu religion believing in many Gods and Goddesses. How You reconcile them and maintain harmonious relationship among them? Is there a superior sect in Hinduism?

Lord Krishna: As God it is my duty to keep harmony in society, creation and universe. Not only We, the Gods and Goddesses, manage Hindu sects, but also all religions together.

I: Do You all Gods of all religions meet regularly?

Lord Krishna: Yes We meet and try to reconcile through humane human beings. We will be continuously striving and trying for peaceful coexistence of all human beings of all denominations, nature, other living beings and the whole Universe as a whole.

I: Why You have created caste system? You so clearly claimed about it in Bhagawadgita saying “mayaa srustam..” and took the credit for that.

Lord Krishna: A seer like you put those words in my mouth.

I: Did You not create caste system?

Lord Krishna: When human being is clouded with ego and illusive identity with body and social status, creates and sees these differences; when becomes spiritual, does not see these differences.

I: You again turned vedantic.

Lord Krishna: No, not at all. You have studied and are teaching physics. Can same substance be solid and liquid simultaneously? At a particular time and space it is solid. At the same space or another space at a different time it is liquid. When solid is there liquid ceases to exist and is absent. When liquid is present solid ceases to exist and is absent. Same substance transforms both ways under the influence of energy available and environment. Energy changes and transforms. Delusion as superior or otherwise is influence of maya, the virtual form of mental energy.

Similarly in a particular phase of mind and perception, one is discriminative. The same person in a different phase of mind with insight is above discrimination.

I termed such persons as samadarsinaha in the stanza:

Vidyaa vinaya sampanne
Braahmane gavi hastini
Sunichaiva swapake cha
Panditaaha samadarnihana

Meaning: Learned spiritual people treat great scholars, the realized seers, the cow, the elephant, the dog and the dog eater with same respect.

As long as egos exist so long exist these discriminations.

Even now you are all not treating all human beings equally. White skinned people discriminate against black and brown skinned people. Political parties, regional group leaders and caste champions, all have their own unchallenged reverse discriminations.

Trade union leaders are behaving as caste leaders and created new caste system and are exploiting you.

Even now University teachers, bank employees, daily wage laborers, are all not living equally. And all of them have their own egos and identities. They do not agree all of them are equal. They feel superior or inferior.

And observe nature, you will realize that equality is a myth and nature possesses all kinds of stuff which are not equal but are different and diverse.

Only NGOs and politicians talk about and profess equality even though they breach their own lecturing in action.

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The Modern Day

I stand up for my pride
I dont wanna be just like anyone
In this world I cannot hide
I must finish what I have begun
Thats the way I play
In the modern day
cause I wanna stay
In the modern day
Got a picture in my mind
Of the way that I wanna be
So I search until I find
The power inside of me
Its another phase
Of the modern day
Gotta face up to this life
Cant let it get the best of me
So I make a sacrifice
If thats the way it has to be
Im doin what I feel is right
Im ready if I need to fight
In the modern way
In the modern day
Gotta face up to this life
Cant let it get the best of me
If I make a sacrifice
Thats the way it has to be
Like a motor in overdrive
I feel good and I feel alive
I got no need to beg or borrow
Got a shortcut to tomorrow
And Im on my way
To the modern day
Got a lot to say
In the modern day
cause I need to stay
In the modern day
In the modern day

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