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Langston Hughes

Humor is laughing at what you haven't got when you ought to have it.

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Morning Humor

Slippery jack, no more turning back,
All around, morning humor
I am a waiter and I am a server
Ill run to your needs with strength and fervor
In times when you are wasted I will walk in
Through the door, pick you from the floor
Then watch you grow into a man
With a big burly beard
And a mustache to match
Ill watch you love the world
And all that it has...
With that morning humor,
Morning humor
The kind that wakes you up
The kind thats in my blood
Morning humor, morning humor, yeah...
I am on top again, soon to be low again
Oh will this ever end?
Im sorry I dont mean to sound like a whale
Trapped in the ice, but aint it nice to say exactly
What I please...
With a big toney voice or a
Soft mellow voice or the
Loud boisterous voice of an opera, opera lady!
With that morning humor,
Morning humor
The kind that wakes you up.
The kind thats in my blood
Morning humor, morning humor, yeah...
But the joke that kills
Is just a joke to you
You need some...
Slippery jack, no more turning back,
All around, morning humor
The kind that wakes you up
The kind thats in my blood...
Morning humor...

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Please, O God of Humor

Please, O God of Humor, give me the gift of being funny
naturally funny
so I can produce poetry and verse that tickles
and makes readers laugh so much their coins roll out of their wallets;
and let the children roll on the floor when my poems are recited;
for indeed my humor is the worst online by any standard
(or lack of standard)
for when I publish poems meant to be funny
my readers never understand me
and what I thought funny, they think tragic
and what I thought was tickle-tickle material
they find pathetic and practically laughable;
I am lectured to or consoled by readers
when I attempt humor;
I am sent e-mails and spam of advice
and words of caution when I attempt to be witty;
and my 113th poem
on the funny side of social networking
brought sympathy and pity for my lack of friends
but no appreciation for what I thought was funny;
and my 213th poem on old ladies at banks
brought outrage at me for hanging out at banks to ogle at wealthy, old ladies;
my 3131th poem on religion, the Divine
and its Power-packed representatives on Planet Earth
provoked no laughter but the ire and wrath of the other God
(you know, not you the Laughing God,
but the Other One, the Only One, the Angry Jealous God)


really neither man nor beast
nor the Highest Being in heaven
truly
nobody laughs at my verse
and nobody finds my offbeat humor at all funny;
Oh please,
God of Humor,
please make my humor a little like that of
Mr Bean or Jim Carrie
so I can have a universal audience
that will laugh at anything I write
(and perhaps incidentally, I’ll make some money)
and then they’ll all say:
See what the God of Humor and Laughter has done
for that simpleton Raj who never knew what humor in poetry is
Please God of Humor, won't you humor me?

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Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Hiawatha's Wooing

"As unto the bow the cord is,
So unto the man is woman;
Though she bends him, she obeys him,
Though she draws him, yet she follows;
Useless each without the other!"
Thus the youthful Hiawatha
Said within himself and pondered,
Much perplexed by various feelings,
Listless, longing, hoping, fearing,
Dreaming still of Minnehaha,
Of the lovely Laughing Water,
In the land of the Dacotahs.
"Wed a maiden of your people,"
Warning said the old Nokomis;
"Go not eastward, go not westward,
For a stranger, whom we know not!
Like a fire upon the hearth-stone
Is a neighbor's homely daughter,
Like the starlight or the moonlight
Is the handsomest of strangers!"
Thus dissuading spake Nokomis,
And my Hiawatha answered
Only this: "Dear old Nokomis,
Very pleasant is the firelight,
But I like the starlight better,
Better do I like the moonlight!"
Gravely then said old Nokomis:
"Bring not here an idle maiden,
Bring not here a useless woman,
Hands unskilful, feet unwilling;
Bring a wife with nimble fingers,
Heart and hand that move together,
Feet that run on willing errands!"
Smiling answered Hiawatha:
'In the land of the Dacotahs
Lives the Arrow-maker's daughter,
Minnehaha, Laughing Water,
Handsomest of all the women.
I will bring her to your wigwam,
She shall run upon your errands,
Be your starlight, moonlight, firelight,
Be the sunlight of my people!"
Still dissuading said Nokomis:
"Bring not to my lodge a stranger
From the land of the Dacotahs!
Very fierce are the Dacotahs,
Often is there war between us,
There are feuds yet unforgotten,
Wounds that ache and still may open!"
Laughing answered Hiawatha:

[...] Read more

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Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The Song of Hiawatha X: Hiawatha's Wooing

'As unto the bow the cord is,
So unto the man is woman,
Though she bends him, she obeys him,
Though she draws him, yet she follows,
Useless each without the other!'

Thus the youthful Hiawatha
Said within himself and pondered,
Much perplexed by various feelings,
Listless, longing, hoping, fearing,
Dreaming still of Minnehaha,
Of the lovely Laughing Water,
In the land of the Dacotahs.

'Wed a maiden of your people,'
Warning said the old Nokomis;
'Go not eastward, go not westward,
For a stranger, whom we know not!
Like a fire upon the hearth-stone
Is a neighbor's homely daughter,
Like the starlight or the moonlight
Is the handsomest of strangers!'

Thus dissuading spake Nokomis,
And my Hiawatha answered
Only this: 'Dear old Nokomis,
Very pleasant is the firelight,
But I like the starlight better,
Better do I like the moonlight!'

Gravely then said old Nokomis:
'Bring not here an idle maiden,
Bring not here a useless woman,
Hands unskilful, feet unwilling;
Bring a wife with nimble fingers,
Heart and hand that move together,
Feet that run on willing errands!'

Smiling answered Hiawatha:
'In the land of the Dacotahs
Lives the Arrow-maker's daughter,
Minnehaha, Laughing Water,
Handsomest of all the women.
I will bring her to your wigwam,
She shall run upon your errands,
Be your starlight, moonlight, firelight,
Be the sunlight of my people!'

Still dissuading said Nokomis:
'Bring not to my lodge a stranger

[...] Read more

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Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The Song of Hiawatha: X

X. Hiawatha's Wooing

"As unto the bow the cord is,
So unto the man is woman,
Though she bends him, she obeys him,
Though she draws him, yet she follows,
Useless each without the other!"

Thus the youthful Hiawatha
Said within himself and pondered,
Much perplexed by various feelings,
Listless, longing, hoping, fearing,
Dreaming still of Minnehaha,
Of the lovely Laughing Water,
In the land of the Dacotahs.

"Wed a maiden of your people,"
Warning said the old Nokomis;
"Go not eastward, go not westward,
For a stranger, whom we know not!
Like a fire upon the hearth-stone
Is a neighbor's homely daughter,
Like the starlight or the moonlight
Is the handsomest of strangers!"

Thus dissuading spake Nokomis,
And my Hiawatha answered
Only this: "Dear old Nokomis,
Very pleasant is the firelight,
But I like the starlight better,
Better do I like the moonlight!"

Gravely then said old Nokomis:
"Bring not here an idle maiden,
Bring not here a useless woman,
Hands unskilful, feet unwilling;
Bring a wife with nimble fingers,
Heart and hand that move together,
Feet that run on willing errands!"

Smiling answered Hiawatha:
"In the land of the Dacotahs
Lives the Arrow-maker's daughter,
Minnehaha, Laughing Water,
Handsomest of all the women.
I will bring her to your wigwam,
She shall run upon your errands,
Be your starlight, moonlight, firelight,
Be the sunlight of my people!"

[...] Read more

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Laughing

I'm laughing at your funny face
I'm laughing at this funny place
I'm laughing in my space
I'm laughing at a fast pace

I'm laughing and cannot stop
I'm laughing feeling the bop
I'm laughing at your top
I'm laughing with a cop

My stomach hurts
My cheeks are sore
Yet I want to laugh some more
Just want to laugh day and night
Want to laugh 'cause it feels alright

I'm laughing with Pat
I'm laughing at the cat
I'm laughing at the mat
I'm laughing as the cat sat

Giggle, Giggle, Giggle
Giggle, Giggle, Giggle
Giggle, Giggle.


©Copyright 2010 Willmington. All rights reserved

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Art of Humor

The parody, the comic
The irony, the slapstick 
The comedy, the joke
There are many names of humor

A little flirt, a bit sway
A random bait, a strike catch
A prick of crack, a needed pain
So far we go just for humor 

Because it is fun, because it is crazy
Because it is refreshing, because it brings laugh
Lightening the mood, building emotion
Always use humor in a good way

The situation, the mimic
The trap, the surprise 
The movement, the style
Only human could understand humor 

The witty question, the innocence answer
The spontaneous expression, the awaited performance 
The dilemma, the mistake
Everything could turn into humor 

To tease, to distract
To criticize, to attract 
To break the ice, to open the gag
Don't take humor too serious 

In critical condition, in awkward moment
In relaxing time, in happy hour 
In strange fact, in life experience
Do you know that God also has a sense of humor?

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The Laughing Gnome

I was walking down the high street
When I heard footsteps behind me
And there was a little old man (hello)
In scarlet and grey, shuffling away (laughter)
Well he trotted back to my house
And he sat beside the telly (oaah..)
With his tiny hands on his tummy
Chuckling away, laughing all day (laughter)
Oh, I ought to report you to the gnome office
(gnome office)
Yes
(hahahahaha)
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
Im a laughing gnome and you dont catch me
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
Im a laughing gnome and you cant catch me
Said the laughing gnome
Well I gave him roasted toadstools and a glass of dandelion wine (burp, pardon)
Then I put him on a train to eastbourne
Carried his bag and gave him a fag
(havent you got a light boy? )
Here, where do you come from?
(gnome-mans land, hahihihi)
Oh, really?
In the morning when I woke up
He was sitting on the edge of my bed
With his brother whose name was fred
Hed bought him along to sing me a song
Right, lets hear it
Here, whats that clicking noise?
(thats fred, hes a metrognome, haha)
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
Im a laughing gnome and you dont catch me
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
Im a laughing gnome and you cant catch me
(own up, Im a gnome, aint I right, haha)
Havent you got an ome to go to?
(no, were gnomads)
Didnt they teach you to get your hair cut at school? you look like a rolling gnome.
(no, not at the london school of ecognomics)
Now theyre staying up the chimney
And were living on caviar and honey (hooray!)
Cause theyre earning me lots of money
Writing comedy prose for radio shows
Its the-er (what? )
Its the gnome service of course
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
Im a laughing gnome and you dont catch me
Ha ha ha, oh, dear me
(ha ha ha, hee hee hee

[...] Read more

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Darwins Children

Seven million years of progress handed down on silver wings
Of gossamer and protein still we havent learned a thing
Are we caught up in our anger, locked up in our rage
In the opera of selection on this our earthly stage
And charlies spinning laughing, laughing in his grave
Laughing at the prophecy, the prophecy he gave
Can we spread our wings like angels, can we break out of the grind
Are we destined to be darwins children this time
The ribbons of our cigarettes vanish in the ai
Rin the glow of our great teacher we sit and blankly stare
And the sky could open up and what would we have to say
Something cute about burning out, better than fading away
And charlies spinning laughing, laughing in his grave
Laughing at the prophecy, the prophecy he gave
Can we spread our wings like angels, can we break out of the grind
Are we destined to be darwins children this time
On the wings of invention now we hurdle toward our fate
As sure as the sunset burns
Collective resignation, evolutionary fate
When will we ever learn
And charlies spinning laughing, laughing in his grave
Laughing at the prophecy, the prophecy he gave
Can we spread our wings like angels, can we break out of the grind
Are we destined to be darwins children this time

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Sunshine

Roll and tumble with your big heart falling
You roll and tumble alone
You reach forever with your dirty hand's holding
You reach for something you will never know
Heard you singing in a Taco Bell bathroom
Heard you singing a Cheap Trick song
Yeah, we sang Surrender all the way the county line
When I listen to that music
It makes me think of summertime
Yeah, that acid summer
We were wasted and happy
We were laughing in the sunshine
(Sunshine)
You twist and turn with your bright eyes shining
You twist and turn in the california sun
You wait forever for the life you dream of
You wait for something that will never come
You twist and turn in the slow motion daydream
You twist and turn in your own sweet hell
I don't get too close to the fire anymore
But when I think of you now, it makes me think of summertime
Yeah, that acid summer
We were wasted and happy
We laughing in the sunshine
Laughing in the sunshine
Laughing in the sunshine
Laughing in the sunshine
In the sunshine
Twist and turn with your bright eyes shining
Twist and turn in the california sun
Wait forever for the life you dream of
You wait for something that will never come
You twist and turn in the slow motion freefall
You twist and turn in your own good time
I can't watch you twisting and turning anymore
No I never thought a good time would turn into a lifestyle
No I just can't watch you wait anymore
But when I think of that summertime
It always seem to make me smile
(Smile)
Yeah, that acid summer
We were wasted and happy
We were laughing in the sunshine
(Go!)
We were laughing in the sunshine
(Go!)
Laughing in the sunshine
(Go!)
Laughing in the sunshine
(Go!)

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Sunshine (The Acid Summer)

Roll and tumble with your big heart falling
Youre rolling tumbling alone
Beats forever what your dirty hands holding
You reach for something you will never know
Heard you singing in a taco bell bathroom
Heard you singing a cheap trick song
Yeah, we sang surrender all the way the county line
When I listen to that music
It makes me think of summertime
Yeah, that acid summer
We were wasted and happy
We were laughing in the sunshine
(sunshine)
Twist and turn with your bright eye shining
Twist and turn in the california sun
Wait forever for the life you dream of
You wait for something that will never come
You twist and turn in the slow motion daydream
You twist and turn in your own sweet hell
I dont get too close to the fire anymore
But when I think of you now, it makes me think of summertime
Yeah, that acid summer
We were wasted and happy
We laughing in the sunshine
Laughing in the sunshine
Laughing in the sunshine
Laughing in the sunshine
In the sunshine
Twist and turn with your bright eyes shining
Twist and turn in the california sun
Wait forever for the life you dream of
You wait for something that will never come
You twist and turn in the slow motion freefall
You twist and turn in your own good time
I cant watch you twisting and turning anymore
No I never thought a good time would turn into a lifestyle
No I just cant watch you wait anymore
But when I think of that summertime
It always seem to make me smile
(smile)
Yeah, that acid summer
We were wasted and happy
We were laughing in the sunshine
(go!)
We were laughing in the sunshine
(go!)
Laughing in the sunshine
(go!)
Laughing in the sunshine
(go!)

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Laughing

Laocoon and her two sons
Pressured storm, tried to move
No other more, emotion bound
Martyred, misconstrued
Lighted in a room, lanky room
Lighted, lighted, laughing in tune
Lighted, lighted, laughing
Laocoon and her two sons
Run the gamut, sated view
Know them more, emotion bound
Martyred, misconstrued
Lighted in a room, lanky room
Lighted, lighted, laughing in tune
Lighted, lighted, laughing
In a room, lock the door, latch the room
Lighted, lighted, laughing
Laocoon and her two sons
Ran the gamut, settled new,
Find a place fit to laugh,
Lock the doors, latch the room
Lighted in a room, lanky room
Lighted, lighted, laughing in tune
Lighted, lighted, laughing in tune
Lighted, lighted, laughing in tunes
Lighted, lighted, laughing in tunes

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Sense Of Humor

You will like my sense of humor
You will be addicted to my smile
Laughing all the while
And I will end each conversation
I will leave the room with upper hand
And you will understand
You will find my scent attractive
You will like my real, engaging eyes
And playful, childlike smile
You will find my style appealing
I will overpower you with wits
And I will be a hit
If only you'd run to me
If only you'd come to me
If only you'd relax upon your rules
And dare to be love's fool
If only you'd come for me
If only you'd run to me
If only you'd relax upon those rules
And dare to be love's fool
Waking up from a coma (tossing, turning)
Sweat has covered my body (my mouth felt dry)
My life flashing before me (nothing much to say)
Still it was so boring (did you hear me sing?)
Only I could adore you (the wind through the trees)
Silently barking orders (rushing up to me)
This is only beginning (don't anger the sea)
Oh, the wave's crashing higher and higher on me
Crash, crash, crash, crash
If only you'd relax upon your rules
And dare to be love's fool
If only you'd run to me
All the blinking lights, noise of eternity (if only you'd come to me)
All the sentences swirling inside of me (you will like my sense of humor)
Inside of me (and dare to be love's fool)
(If only you'd come to me)
I have censored my eyes, I get drawn through my ears (if only you'd run to me)
Redirected desire now
It comes out as tears (you will like my sense of humor)
You know, it comes out as tears (and dare to be love's fool)
You will like my sense of humor
You will like my sense of humor

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Cry Now Laugh Later

Cry now, laugh later.
Its time now to return the favor,
Cry now, laugh laugh later.
I dont know why Im laughing,
Im still wet from the rain,
I dont know why Im laughing,
Im still spotted from the stain.
I dont know why Im laughing,
Im burning from the flame,
I dont know why Im laughing,
Theres a storm running through my veins.
Cry now, laugh later,
Cry now, laugh later,
Sign out, Ill see you later,
Time now to return the favor.
You know I aint lying,
Its so unreal on the other side,
Ill tell you why Im crying,
Dads ten grand on a 4 wheel drive,
I thought they wanted money,
Two thieves as they were passing by,
They tied me up so lonely,
And took the car out from under my eyes.
Cry now, laugh later,
Cry now, Ill get you later,
Im just too tired now to return the favor,
Cry now laugh later.
I dont know why Im laughing,
Immigration breathing down my back,
Aint got no money for a pay off,
Stay in jail until they send me back,
I dont know why Im laughing,
Im still hurting from the pain,
A foreigner in this hell hole,
He aint never gunna touch me again.
Cry now, laugh later,
Its time now to return the favor,
Youe got me crying now,
Ill laugh at you later,
Time now to return the favor.
I dont know why Im laughing,
Im still wet from the rain,
I dont know why Im crying,
Im still spotted from the stain.
You know I aint lying,
Im burning burning up from the flame,
I dont know why Im laughing,
Ive got the storm running through my veins.
Cry now, laugh later,
Baby got to sign out return later,

[...] Read more

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Im So Happy I Cant Stop Crying

Seven weeks have passed now since she left me
She shows her face to ask me how I am
She says the kids are fine and that they miss me
Maybe I could come and baby-sit sometime
She says, are you o.k.? I was worried about you
Can you forgive me? I hope that youll be happy.
Im so happy that I cant stop crying
Im so happy Im laughing through my tears
I saw a friend of mine
He said, i was worried about you
I heard she had another man,
I wondered how you felt about it?
Im so happy that I cant stop crying
Im so happy Im laughing though my tears
Saw my lawyer, mr good news
He got me joint custody and legal separation
Im so happy that I cant stop crying
Im laughing through my tears
Im laughing through my tears
I took a walk alone last night
I looked up at the stars
To try and find an answer in my life
I chose a star for me
I chose a star for him
I chose two stars for my kids and one star for my wife
Something made me smile
Something seemed to ease the pain
Something about the universe and how its all connected
The park is full of sunday fathers and melted ice cream
We try to do the best within the given time
A kid should be with his mother
Everybody knows that
What can a father do but baby-sit sometimes?
I saw that friend of mine, he said,
you look different somehow
I said, everybodys got to leave the darkness sometime
Im so happy that I cant stop crying
Im laughing through my tears
Im laughing through my tears
Im so happy that I cant stop crying
Im laughing through my tears
Im laughing through my tears

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Im So Happy I Cant Stop Crying

(toby keith & sting)
Seven weeks have passed now since she left me,
She shows her face to ask me how I am
She says the kids are fine and that they miss me
Maybe I could come and baby-sit sometime
She says, are you o.k? I was worried about you.
Can you forgive me? I hope that youll be happy.
Im so happy that I cant stop crying
Im so happy Im laughing through my tears
I saw a friend of mine. he said, I was worried about you
I heard she had another man, I wondered how you felt about i
Im so happy that I cant stop crying
Im so happy Im laughing through my tears
Saw my lawyer, mr. good news, he got me
Joint custody and legal separation
Im so happy that I cant stop crying
Im laughing through my tears,
Im laughing through my tears
I took a walk alone last night.
I looked up at the stars
To try to find an answer in my life
I chose a star for me, I chose a star for him
I chose two stars for my kids and one star for my wife
Something made me smile.
Something seemed to ease the pain
Something about the universe and how its all connected
The park is full of sunday fathers, and melted ice cream
We try to do the best, within the givin time
A kid should be with his mother, everybody knows that
What can a father do but baby-sit sometimes?
I saw that friend of mine, he said, you look different somehow.
I said, everybodys got to leave this darkness sometime.
Im so happy that I cant stop crying,
Im laughing through my tears,
Im laughing through my tears
Im so happy that I cant stop crying
Im laughing through my tears,
Im laughing through my tears

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I'm So Happy I Can't Stop Crying (feat. Sting)

(Toby Keith & Sting)
(Sting)
Seven weeks have passed now since she left me,
She shows her face to ask me how I am
She says the kids are fine and that they miss me
Maybe I could come and baby-sit sometime
She says, are you o.k? I was worried about you.
Can you forgive me? I hope that you'll be happy.
I'm so happy that I can't stop crying
I'm so happy I'm laughing through my tears
I saw a friend of mine. he said, I was worried about you
I heard she had another man, I wondered how you felt about I
I'm so happy that I can't stop crying
I'm so happy I'm laughing through my tears
Saw my lawyer, Mr. good news, he got me
Joint custody and legal separation
I'm so happy that I can't stop crying
I'm laughing through my tears,
I'm laughing through my tears
I took a walk alone last night.
I looked up at the stars
To try to find an answer in my life
I chose a star for me, I chose a star for him
I chose two stars for my kids and one star for my wife
Something made me smile.
Something seemed to ease the pain
Something about the universe and how it's all connected
The park is full of sunday fathers, and melted ice cream
We try to do the best, within the givin time
A kid should be with his mother, everybody knows that
What can a father do but baby-sit sometimes?
I saw that friend of mine, he said, you look different somehow.
I said, everybody's got to leave this darkness sometime.
I'm so happy that I can't stop crying,
I'm laughing through my tears,
I'm laughing through my tears
I'm so happy that I can't stop crying
I'm laughing through my tears,
I'm laughing through my tears

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Youre Laughing At Me

I love you which is easy to see
But I have to keep guessing how you feel about me
You listen to the words that I speak
But I feel that you listen with your tongue in your cheek
Youre laughing at me
I cant get sentimental
For youre laughing at me I know
I want to be romantic but I havent a chance
Youve got a sense of humor, and humor is death to romance
Youre laughing at me
Why do you think its funny
When I say that I love you so?
Youve got me worried and Im all at sea
For while Im crying for you
Youre laughing at me

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Youre Laughing At Me

I love you which is easy to see
But I have to keep guessing how you feel about me
You listen to the words that I speak
But I feel that you listen with your tongue in your cheek
Youre laughing at me
I cant get sentimental
For youre laughing at me I know
I want to be romantic but I havent a chance
Youve got a sense of humor, and humor is death to romance
Youre laughing at me
Why do you think its funny
When I say that I love you so?
Youve got me worried and Im all at sea
For while Im crying for you
Youre laughing at me

song performed by Irving BerlinReport problemRelated quotes
Added by Lucian Velea
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Im A Rebel

They say I wont make it to the top of the hill
Wont take the fruit of a tree
And evrybody says Im out for the kill
Theyre all laughing at me
Theyre all laughing at me
Im a rebel - rebel - dont you just know it
Im a rebel - rebel
And theyre all laughing at me
They say Im a danger to the public and all
I only wish they would see
Im just a product of a screwed up world - but theyre all
Theyre all laughing at me
But theyre all laughing at me
Im a rebel - rebel - dont you just know it
Im a rebel - rebel - dont you just know it
Im a rebel - rebel
But theyre all laughing at me
Never ever wash my old blue jeans
And brush the smile off my face
But still Im a member of the
Human race - human race - human race - human race
Im a rebel - rebel - dont you just know it
Im a rebel - rebel - dont you just know it
Im a rebel - rebel - dont you just know it
Im a rebel - rebel
And theyre all laughing at me
Im a rebel

song performed by U. D. O.Report problemRelated quotes
Added by Lucian Velea
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