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I was 36, and I had decided to quit acting because it was so disappointing.

quote by Phil Hartman
Added by Lucian Velea
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I Quit

i quit trying to save the world...
and just offered my hand,
and walked beside it.
i quit trying to find the truth,
for it was already within me.
i quit trying to tell anyone anything,
and just listened in perfect stillness.
i quit trying to be religious,
and found the sacred in the common.
i quit trying to stop the wars,
and let the wars within me end!
i quit trying to find god,
and just looked in the mirror.
i quit fighting for freedom,
and found a freedom they couldnt take.
i quit shouting out for justice,
and walked in a way that was just.
i quit wanting to own anything,
and so broke the final bonds.
i quit trying to be what they wanted,
and decided to be myself.
i quit blaming, condemning, and accusing,
and took the responsibility on myself.
i quit trying to make myself a name,
and walked in nobody's shoes.
i quit staring from behind the bars,
that were never really there.
i quit seeking to define and hold,
and just let go and lived.
i quit hiding from death, and opened the door,
and found the light from which darkness
is made!

poem by Eric Cockrell
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Disappointing Daughter

Meet their disappointing daughter,
with her disappointing ways.
They would oh-so-love to humour her,
but it really never pays.
What's wrong with that girl, anyway?
She's always in a daze.
Why won't she join in with their games?
Her brother always plays.
It's not that they're ashamed of her -
but some of her displays -
and, let's face it, in public, too...
Such a disappointing daughter:
imperfect;
human;
got drunk when younger;
went out with a few dodgy blokes,
when younger -
such a disappointing daughter,
with her disappointing - unforgivably
disappointing - ways.

poem by Paula Puddephatt
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Quit Hollerin At Me

I dont want your big french fry
I dont want your car
I dont want to buy no soap
From no washed-up movie star
You are so much louder
Than the show I wanna hear
With your sugarless gum
Gee, but Im dumb
Non-alcoholic beer
Its enough to make a grown man
Blow up his own tv
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
I heard you the first time
I heard myself say
Seems like the little woman
Is getting bigger every day
You dont have to tell the neighbors
A little silence aint no sin
They already think my name is
Where in the hell you been?
Louder, louder, louder, louder, louder
Constantly
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Whoa oh whoa oh
Sweet serenity
Whoa oh whoa oh
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Aint it great at the end of the day
When there aint no sound around
Just me and the fence post
Staring each other down
Nothing but a big bunch of nothing
Driving me insane
Cause there aint no voice thats louder
Than the one inside my brain
Hey you go on
Go on and let me be
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Whoa oh whoa oh
Sweet serenity
Whoa oh whoa oh
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me
Quit hollerin at me

song performed by John Prine
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Original Wrapper

The last shot should've killed me
Pour another drink
Let's drink to the last shot
And the blood on the dishes in the sink
Blood inside the coffee cup
Blood on the table top
When you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
But when you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
I shot blood at the fly on the wall
My heart almost stopped
Hardly there at all
I broke the mirror with my fall
With my fall - fall - fall
Fall - fall - fall
Gimme a double
Give yourself one too
Gimme a short beer
One for you too
And a toast to everything that doesn't move
That doesn't move
But when you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
Whiskey, bourbon, vodka and scotch
I don't care what it is you've got
I just want to know that it's my last shot
My last shot
I remember when I quit pretty good
See this here's where I chipped my tooth
I shot a vein in my neck and I coughed up a quaalude
On my last shot
My last shot
But when you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit
But you always wish
You knew it was your last shot

song performed by Lou Reed
Added by Lucian Velea
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The Last Shot

Last shot sure killed me
Pour another drink
Lets drink to the last shot
And the blood on the dishes in the sink
Blood inside the coffee cup
Blood on the table top
But when you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
I shot blood at the fly on the wall
My heart almost stopped hardly there at all
I broke the mirror with my fall, with my -
- fall-fall-fall
Fall-fall-fall
Gimme a double, give yourself one two
Gimme a short beer, one for you too
And a toast to everything that doesnt move
That doesnt move
But when you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
Whiskey, bourbon, vodka and scotch
I dont care what it is youve got
I just want to know that its my last shot
My last shot
I remember when I quit pretty good
See this here, this is where I chipped my tooth
Shot of vein in my neck and I coughed up a quaalude
On my last shot
My last shot
Heres a toast to all thats good
And heres a toast to hate
And heres a toast to toasting and Im not boasting
When I say Im getting straight
When I say Im getting straight
But when you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot
When you quit, you quit, but you always wish
That you knew it was your last shot

song performed by Lou Reed
Added by Lucian Velea
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Through the eyes of a Field Coronet (Epic)

Introduction

In the kaki coloured tent in Umbilo he writes
his life’s story while women, children and babies are dying,
slowly but surely are obliterated, he see how his nation is suffering
while the events are notched into his mind.

Lying even heavier on him is the treason
of some other Afrikaners who for own gain
have delivered him, to imprisonment in this place of hatred
and thoughts go through him to write a book.

Prologue

The Afrikaner nation sprouted
from Dutchmen,
who fought decades without defeat
against the super power Spain

mixed with French Huguenots
who left their homes and belongings,
with the revocation of the Edict of Nantes.
Associate this then with the fact

that these people fought formidable
for seven generations
against every onslaught that they got
from savages en wild animals

becoming marksmen, riding
and taming wild horses
with one bullet per day
to hunt a wild antelope,

who migrated right across the country
over hills in mass protest
and then you have
the most formidable adversary
and then let them fight

in a natural wilderness
where the hunter,
the sniper and horseman excels
and any enemy is at a lost.

Let them then also be patriotic
into their souls,
believe in and read
out of the word of God

[...] Read more

poem by Gert Strydom
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My Fate Decided

D day
The icy spray of the sea
The soft murmur of men
The retailing of packs
The wait of mine secured on my back
My fate decided

The blow of a whistle
The thump of the 88`s letting lose
The rattle of bullets hitting the boat
The caused cry
The scream of men
The roar of metal ripping apart
My fate decided

The boat stoping
The men confused
The red water linking in
The ramp is opening
My fate decided

The whistles blown
The line a broken
Pushing men not wanting to leave
The water red and cold
The pounding of bullets
The scream of men all around
My fate decided

Blood bleached sand thick and red
My rifle a swung on my back
The clocking of wet rifles
The explosion of a boat
The cry of men, metal and guns
My fate decided

The sicken sight
The feeling worse
The pounding of feet
The rocks
Can we make it?
My fate decided

The rifle unsung
The rocks and shelter still far away
Can we make it?
Falling men hitting hard to the dirt
Is this where we should all now lay?
My fate decided

[...] Read more

poem by Mike Cochrane
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Quit Your Low Down Ways

Oh, you can read out your bible,
You can fall down on your knees, pretty mama,
And pray to the lord
But it aint gonna do no good.
Youre gonna need
Youre gonna need my help someday
Well, if you cant quit your sinnin
Please quit your low down ways.
Well, you can run down to the white house,
You can gaze at the capitol dome, pretty mama,
You can pound on the presidents gate
But you oughta know by now its gonna be too late.
Youre gonna need
Youre gonna need my help someday
Well, if you cant quit your sinnin
Please quit your low down ways.
Well, you can run down to the desert,
Throw yourself on the burning sand.
You can raise up your right hand, pretty mama,
But you better understand you done lost your one good man.
Youre gonna need
Youre gonna need my help someday
Well, if you cant quit your sinnin
Please quit your low down ways.
And you can hitchhike on the highway,
You can stand all alone by the side of the road.
You can try to flag a ride back home, pretty mama,
But you cant ride in my car no more.
Youre gonna need
Youre gonna need my help someday
Well, if you cant quit your sinnin
Please quit your low down ways.
Oh, you can read out your bible,
You can fall down on your knees, pretty mama,
And pray to the lord
But it aint gonna do no good.
Youre gonna need
Youre gonna need my help someday
Well, if you cant quit your sinnin
Please quit your low down ways.

song performed by Bob Dylan
Added by Lucian Velea
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Long Distance Caller

I'm a long distance caller,
Focused on your needs.
And you may not know this,
Since near you I don't sit.

I'm a long distance caller,
Here to please not tease.
And it's you I picked,
To receive this benefit.

Close your eyes,
And realize your bright side.
Don't you ever quit,
Being positive.

Just close your eyes,
And want to feel good inside.
Get rid of that hold,
To let your troubles go!
Know it's you I picked,
To receive this benefit.

Close your eyes,
And realize your bright side.
It is you I picked,
To receive this benefit.

I'm a long distance caller,
Focused on your needs.
And you may not know this,
Since near you I don't sit.

Close your eyes,
And realize your bright side.
Don't you ever quit,
Being positive.
'Hello.'
Don't you ever quit,
Being positive.
'Hello.'
Don't you ever quit,
Being positive.

Close your eyes,
To realize your bright side.
And don't you ever quit.
'Hello, hello.'
Don't you ever quit.
'Hello, hello.'
Don't you ever quit.

[...] Read more

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Reluctance

Will I have some mo' dat pie?
No, ma'am, thank-ee, dat is--I--
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Dat ah pie look sutny good:
How 'd you feel now ef I would?
I don' reckon dat I should;
Bettah quit daihin' me.

Look hyeah, I gwine tell de truf,
Mine is sholy one sweet toof:
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Yass'm, yass'm, dat's all right,
I 's done tried to be perlite:
But dat pie 's a lakly sight,
Wha 's de use o' daihin' me?

My, yo' lips is full an' red,
Don't I wish you 'd tu'n yo' haid?
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Dat ain't faih, now, honey chile,
I 's gwine lose my sense erwhile
Ef you des set daih an' smile,
Bettah quit daihin' me.

Nuffin' don' look ha'f so fine
Ez dem teef, deah, w'en dey shine:
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Now look hyeah, I tells you dis;
I 'll give up all othah bliss
Des to have one little kiss,
Bettah quit daihin' me.

Laws, I teks yo' little han',
Ain't it tendah? bless de lan'--
Bettah quit daihin' me.
I 's so lonesome by myse'f,
'D ain't no fun in livin' lef';
Dis hyeah life's ez dull ez def:
Bettah quit daihin' me.

Why n't you tek yo' han' erway?
Yass, I 'll hol' it: but I say
Bettah quit daihin' me.
Holin' han's is sholy fine.
Seems lak dat 's de weddin' sign.
Wish you 'd say dat you 'd be mine;--
Dah you been daihin' me.

poem by Paul Laurence Dunbar
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Real Life

Paula came from washington with long golden hair
Twenty eight dollars in a fake silk purse and a leather skirt to wear
Shane came from dublin town from the old world so green
Counterfeit ticket in to jfk in the land of his dreams
Street lifes the only life they take a walk in the park
Even tough they only met that day they were lovers by dark
Laid out on the morning skies he puts a ring on her hand
He said listen babe we gotta take whats ours do it or die
Quit dreaming this is real life baby
Real lifes the only life whats it all about
Quit dreaming this is real life baby
Way out on the dock that night the colour is red
23rd victim of a gangland war takes his last breath
Outside the sister cried she said the whole worlds so mean
Heavyweight killer in the ring, turns killing machine
Quit dreaming this is real life baby
Real lifes the only life whats it all about
Quit dreaming this is real life baby
All my love, youre my all
They way you move, youre in control
The way you talk, the way you dress
Your hands, your touch, your sweet caress.
All my love, youre the best,
Every little thing that I possess,
Its all emotion when you take control,
I can feel wild horses running in my soul.
Oh my love, all I see
The stars, the sun, the energy,
If this going to kill us then let it go,
Quit dreaming this is real life baby
Up high above a desert sky where the space shuttles scream,
Sixteen men from a dying earth take their last dream.
Quit dreaming this is real life baby
Quit dreaming this is cheap life baby
Real lifes the only life whats it all about
Quit dreaming this is cheap life baby
Your eyes, your lips, the shape of your mouth,
Its a sweet life baby
All my love, youre my all
The way you move, the way you go
Im all emotion when you take control
I can feel wild horses running in my soul.
All my love, youre all I see
The stars, the sun, the energy,
The way you move, youre in control
Quit dreaming this is real life baby
Written by : kerr/burchill reproduced without permission

song performed by Simple Minds
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Loving That Taste For The Gutter

If they always call those they visit trash,
And on a daily basis they are around them.
What do they regard themselves?
Trash collectors?
Or recycled garbage...
Loving that taste for the gutter.

They can't leave it,
'Cause they come right back.
No matter what they call it they want it like that!
Because they love that taste for the gutter.
They love that taste for the gutter.

Whenever its suspected someone else will attack,
They will defend their trash with a coming back.
Because they love that taste for the gutter.
Yes they love that taste for the gutter.

They can't leave it,
'Cause they come right back.
No matter what they call it they want it like that!
Because they love that taste for the gutter.
They love that taste for the gutter.

If they always call those they visit trash,
And on a daily basis they are around them.
What do they regard themselves?
Trash collectors?
Garbage defenders?

Whenever its suspected someone else will attack,
They will defend their trash with a coming back.
Because they love that taste for the gutter.
Yes they love that taste for the gutter.

Garbage defenders,
Loving that taste for the gutter.
Trash collectors,
Loving that taste for the gutter.
But wont admit or quit,
Loving that taste for the gutter.

They can't leave it,
'Cause they come right back.
Because they love that taste for the gutter.
Garbage defenders,
Loving that taste for the gutter.
Trash collectors,
Loving that taste for the gutter.
But wont admit or quit,

[...] Read more

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Quit And Think About Tomorrow

No you can't fool me.
I don't easily buy it.
And no you can't fool me.
I'm looking right in your eyes.

No you can't fool me.
I don't easily buy it.
And no you can't fool me.
I'm looking right in your eyes.

You may say one thing to me...
But I'm looking right in your eyes.
You want me to believe...
But I'm looking right in your eyes.
And it is so incredible...
As I look you in your eyes.
That you'll choose to lie to me.
Your habits are no surprise.

When you're feeling down and out,
You try to pretend you're happy.
When you're feeling lonely too,
You try to hide this from me.
And when you are troubled...
I know that you are.
I know you are feeling...
Sad and blue.
I know that you are...
But what else can I do?

No you can't fool me.
I don't easily buy it.
And no you can't fool me.
I'm looking right in your eyes.

No you can't fool me.
I don't easily buy it.
And no you can't fool me.
I'm looking right in your eyes.

You may say one thing to me...
But I'm looking right in your eyes.
You want me to believe...
But I'm looking right in your eyes.
And it is so incredible...
As I look you in your eyes.
That you'll choose to lie to me.
Your habits are no surprise.

When you're feeling down and out,

[...] Read more

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Maybe I'm crazy

I am not Emo
I’m not a Goth
I’m perfectly normal
But I know what it feels to be lost
Stuck in the crowd
Can’t hear a sound
Feels like I’m pushed back in the distance
Can’t come out
Do people see?
Do they believe?
Or am I just crazy from being lonely?

The words burst from my lips as I scream
But the people around me don’t seem to hear a thing
Am I invisible? Am I going crazy?
The world is acting like they don’t know about me
Am I forgotten? Am I just crazy?
Am I just lost? Am I just lonely?
Somebody hear me
Somebody save me

I check my phone, nobody calls
I can’t help, but feeling so forgot
I put on a show, nobody knows
Where did all the people I used to love, go?
I see a face, forgot its name
But they don’t seem to recognize me, anyway
All of my friends are with somebody else
And now I’m sitting here all by myself
(All by myself)

The words burst from my lips as I scream
(From my lips, as I scream)
But the people around me don’t seem to hear a thing
(But the people, don’t hear a thing)
Am I invisible? Am I going crazy?
(Am I invisible? Am I going crazy?)
The world is acting like they don’t know about me
(Acting like, don’t know about me)
Am I forgotten? Am I going crazy?
(Am I forgotten? Am I going crazy?)
Am I just lost? Am I just lonely?
(Am I just lost, maybe I’m lonely)
Somebody hear me
(Somebody near me)
Somebody save me
(Somebody save me)
Or am I just crazy?
Or am I just crazy?

[...] Read more

poem by Sugar Bear
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I Have Decided

I have decided,
Im gonna live like a believer,
Turn my back on the deceiver,
Im gonna live what I believe.
I have decided,
Being good is just a fable,
I just cant cause Im not able.
Im gonna leave it to the lord.
Theres a wealth of things that I profess,
I said that I believed,
But deep inside I never changed;
I guess Id been deceived.
cause a voice inside kept telling me,
That Id change by and by,
But the spirit made it clear to me,
That kind of lifes a lie.
I have decided,
Im gonna live like a believer,
Turn my back on the deciver,
Im gonna live what I believe.
I have decided,
Being good is just a fable,
I just cant cause Im not able.
Im gonna leave it to the lord.
So forget the game of being good,
And your self-righteous pain.
cause the only good inside your heart
Is the good that jesus brings.
And when the world begins to see you change,
Dont expect them to applaud.
Just keep your eyes on him and tell yourself,
Ive become the work of god.
I have decided,
Im gonna live like a believer,
Turn my back on the deceiver,
Im gonna live what I believe.
I have decided,
Being good is just a fable,
I just cant cause Im not able.
Im gonna leave it to the lord.
I have decided,
Im gonna live like a believer,
Turn my back on the deceiver,
Im gonna live what I believe.
I have decided,
Being good is just a fable,
I just cant cause Im not able.
Im gonna leave it to the lord.
I have decided,
Im gonna live like a believer,

[...] Read more

song performed by Amy Grant
Added by Lucian Velea
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It Just Wont Quit

And I never really sleep anymore
And I always get those dangerous dreams
And I never get a minute of peace
And I gotta wonder what it means
And I gotta wonder what it means
Maybe its nothing and Im under the weather
Maybe its just one of those bugs going round
Maybe Im under a spell and its magic
Maybe theres a witch doctor with an office in town
Is this a blessing? or is it a curse?
Does it get any better? can it get any worse?
Will it go on forever? is it over tonight?
Does it come with the darkness? does it bring out the light?
Is it richer than diamonds?
Or just a little cheaper than spit?
I dont know what it is but it just wont quit
I dont know what it is but it just wont quit
I dont know what it is but it just wont quit
I dont know what it is but it just wont quit
And there used to be such an easy way of living
And there used to be every hope in the world
And I used to get everything that I went after
But there never used to be this girl
No there never used to be this girl
Maybe Im crazy and Im losing my senses
Maybe Im possessed by a spirit or such
Maybe Im desperate and I got no defenses can you het me a perscription for that one perfect touch?
Is this a blessing? or is it a curse?
Does it get any better? can it get any worse?
Will it go on forever? is it over tonight?
Does it come with the darkness? does it bring out the light?
Is it richer than diamonds?
Or just a little cheaper than spit?
I dont know what it is but it just wont quit
I dont know what it is but it just wont quit
I dont know what it is but it just wont quit
I dont know what it is but it just wont quit.....
There was a time when nothing ever really mattered
There was a time when there was nothing I didnt know
There was a time when I knew just what I was living for
There was a time and the time was so long ago
There was a time and the time was so long ago
And I never really sleep anymore........

song performed by Meat Loaf
Added by Lucian Velea
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Hey Men

Hey!
Somebody told me to live is a lie
But I know better got a woman inside
Tells me things that I should understand
cause I know better even though Im a man
So many things go in so many ways
Every single moment like a judgement day
Thank goodness things are gettin better for sure
I got the message
Love is the cure
Uh huh
Oooh yeah
Now I aint stupid but I cant understand
Why so many things are gettin so out of hand
Think we should wonder what the problem could be?
All the world over sing I wanna be free
Dont really matter what you think of me now
cause I got the message
The message is wow
Got everything, got nothing to hide
I got.. what?
I got a woman inside
Uh huh
Oooh yeah
I said, hey men.
Quit knocking your children round
I say, hey-hey men.
Quit mowin your women down
cause its all in the way
That you look at who you are
So hey hey men
Quit looking so far
Oooh yeah
Land of the free is a poor alibi
I learned my lesson when I learned how to fly
Sounds so silly but I think its the truth
I got the message
The message is you
Somebody told me that we live in a dream
Sounds like something that you hear on t.v.
Got everything even though Im a guy
Feels so good
I got a woman inside
Uh huh
Oooh yeah
I said, hey men
Quit pushin your women round
I say, hey -hey men
Quit knockin your children down
cause its all in the things

[...] Read more

song performed by Men Without Hats
Added by Lucian Velea
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Crazy Lowdown Ways

Well i got a problem
and it just won't wait
I've been getting on one
With the man who guards your gate
When he says you're sleeping
In your hideaway
It is what he's keeping back
That gives your game away
Come quit your crazy lowdown ways
You're walking astray
Come quit your weary worn out ways
You're walking astray
And i'd like to say
That i like this
More than i do today
Yes i' got a problem
like you've never seen
I've been getting bothered
By the man who locks your screen
When he says you're hiding
And in your room you'll stay
It is what he's holding back
That says what he can't say
Come quit your crazy lowdown ways
You're walking astray
Come quit your weary worn out ways
You're walking astray
And i'd like to say
That i like this
More than i do today
I'm just a lazy man
Who has to hear the truth
And i hear what's true from you
Come quit your crazy lowdown ways
You're walking astray
Come quit your weary worn out ways
You're walking astray
Come quit your crazy lowdown ways
Come quit your weary worn out ways
You're walking astray
And i'd like to say
That i like this
More than i do today
La la la
La la la
La la la
La la la

song performed by Ocean Colour Scene
Added by Lucian Velea
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I Find It Hard To Believe

I find it hard to believe
I find it hard to believe
That Im embarassed at me
For being upset
Over acting so contemptuously (I find it hard to believe)
Acting so contemptuously (I find it hard to believe)
Acting so contemptuously (that Im embarassed at me)
Acting so contemptuously (that Im embarassed at me)
(for being upset over acting so contemptuously)
Acting so contemptuously (acting so contemptuously)
Acting so contemptuously (on me)
I find it hard to believe

song performed by They Might Be Giants
Added by Lucian Velea
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Promises Promises

Ill promise you a gift worth much more if not sold.
Half for you and half for me if I may act so bold.
Ill promise you a home that money cannot buy.
All good homely spirits walking by and by.
Ill promise you a world of making of amend,
And on our anniversary invite you round the bend.
Ill promise you a life it only takes a tick.
All the fruits of life carry you aboard my ship.
Ill promise you a world of making of amend,
And on the anniversary invite you round the bend.
Dont feign to me youre only acting when you care,
So Ive decided on decisions that will not strike you very fair.
Lets devise a plan and well think about it twice,
Sketching watercolour paints, bury hatchets in the ice.
Dont feign to me youre only acting when you care,
So we decided on decisions that will not strike you very fair.
Lets devise a plan and well think about it twice,
Lets make mates merry, bury hatchets in the ice.
Dont feign to me youre only acting when you care,
So we decided on decisions that will not strike you very fair.
Now lets devise a plan and well think about it twice,
Lets make mates merry, bury hatchets in the ice.
Dont feign to me youre only acting when you care,
So we decided on decisions that will not strike you very fair.
Now lets devise a plan and well think about it twice,
Sketching watercolour paints, bury hatchets in the ice.

song performed by Madness
Added by Lucian Velea
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