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A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit!

quote by Sarah Jessica Parker
Added by Lucian Velea
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Rat Poison

I got the I got the I got the I got the I got the I got the
(boom boom, boom bah!)
I got the I got the I got the I got the I got the I got the
I got the poison
Rat rat rat rat rat poison
Rat rat rat rat rat rat rat poison
(boom boom, boom bah!)
I got I got I got the poison
I got I got I got the remedy
Rat rat rat rat rat poison
Rat rat rat rat rat rat rat poison
(boom boom, boom bah!)
I got the poison!
(boom boom, boom bah!)
I got the I got the I got the I got the I got the I got the
I got the poison
(boom boom, boom bah!)

song performed by Prodigy
Added by Lucian Velea
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A-Rat-A-Tat-Tat.

'A-rat-a-tat-tat.'
You got it!
'A-rat-a-tat-tat.'
You got it!
'A-rat-a-tat-tat.'
You got it!
'A-rat-a-tat...
Tat-tat-tat.'

No more do I eat fried fat back.
Or smothered pork chops,
To put pounds on my thighs...
Butt or back!
Biscuits are my weakness,
So I ain't touching that.

Neck bones I leave alone.
And other greasy meats,
I don't eat.
I prefer to ignore that,
And them I don't condone!
Too sleazy for me.

'A-rat-a-tat-tat.'
You got it!
'A-rat-a-tat-tat.'
You got it!
'A-rat-a-tat-tat.'
You got it!
'A-rat-a-tat...
Tat-tat-tat.'

I do my best to eat fresh vegetables.
With a prepared fresh salad...
Adding fruits and nutts,
To keep my energy up!

Lots of exercise I do!
And conscious to take naps.
With meditation and deep breathing...
To keep my body sleek.
Everyday of the week!

With a diet less treated by soft drinks,
And preprocessed sweets.
I do what I can to be energized...
And my eyes kept open wide,
No aches and pains I'm going to sigh.

'A-rat-a-tat-tat.'

[...] Read more

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Rat Attack

Rat fear
Rat near
Bright black eyes
French fries
Meat pies
Wall walkers
Human stalkers
Rat night
Rat fright

Rat fear
Rat near
Human waste
Dirty place
Gleeful face
Boy with club
Dull thud
Rat dies
Rat prize

Rat fear
Rat near
‘Brave’ team
Ferrets mean
Dogs keen
Whiskered ranger
Senses danger
Rat unseen
Rat supreme

Rat fear
Rat near
Thug with gun
Sick fun
Thinks he’s won
Stinging pain
Human shame
Rat cries
Rat dies

Rat Attack
Fight back
Don’t despise
Bright black eyes
So wise
Wall walker
Shadow stalker,
Rat unseen
Rat supreme

[...] Read more

poem by Alison Campbell
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SONG On: Animal Love

There lived a girl called Lovina,
Whose animal-love was great;
Tall, she was and so much lean, ah!
She sang songs for a treat.

She had a sister, with whom she fought,
Right from her child-hood days!
Both were aged, a year’s diff’rence;
And so they fight-her mother says.

She did her home-work, in a short time,
Dreamt while her mother cooks!
In argument, she was so good,
And loved to read animal-books.

Once there fell down, a small Squirrel,
As she stood ‘neath a Mango-tree;
She laid it gently in a box,
The Squirrel-babe was no more free!

She fed the Squirrel, fruit and nut,
And lullabied it to a sleep;
The baby Squirrel loved her much,
Their friendship grew so deep.

She sang to it and fondled it,
And talked to it whenever free;
She kept it cosy, neat and clean;
Her holidays, went off in glee!

One day, the Squirrel fell so ill;
Perhaps, it thought of its mother!
So, you must set the Squirrel free;
Her doctor-uncle advised her.

With Squirrel ill, her heart turned sad,
Poor Lovina, could not sleep well;
For long, she kept awake and cried;
Was the Squirrel ill ‘cause it fell?

The poor girl prayed, all night and day;
She prayed to God to make it well;
And wished, she could become a fay!
Her life now seemed to look like hell!

She kissed her Squirrel, one more time;
Her Uncle let it up a tree;
The Squirrel squeaked and wagged its tail;
And jumped with joy, away, afree!

[...] Read more

poem by John Celes
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The Rat and the Owl

A rat is moving on the ground;
It searches for something to eat;
’Tis night and it must quickly find
Some food or else, it must sure starve!

A large owl stands with two large eyes;
It turns its neck to scan the ground;
It strains its eyes to catch a prey,
And sees a rat shuffling across!

Both search for food in frantic ways;
Both need to eat to stay alive;
The owl is like a ghost at night;
Its large eyes contrast rat’s small ones!

The owl is predator for rat;
The rat is prey for owl at night;
The owl is sure to pin the rat,
And death is sure for the latter!

The rat moves on unwarily!
It nears the owl innocently;
It does not know that death is near;
Its mind is bent on searching food!

The owl is watching rat’s movements;
The prey is rather small in size;
It tries to keep the rat within
Its visual fields, and take a strike!

The rat is unaware of owl;
It has not sniffed the danger near;
With nostrils engrossed in food-search,
It scurries to and fro for long!

The owl is planning when to swoop;
An opportune moment must come;
The rat must take a moment’s rest;
The owl’s claws take the rat to nest!

The predator is smart and swift;
The prey will certainly get caught;
There is a small chance to escape;
But, predator must make the fault!

Both owl and rat must eat to live;
The rat is prey for owl always;
The rat can still avoid its death;
It must respect the owl’s beak-might!

[...] Read more

poem by John Celes
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The Squirrel Said

The Squirrel said.
'Attention all! '
He stands tall.
On a wooden fence,
in suspense.

Their Squirrel Head,
Their squirrel said,
'My nuts are gone,
My nuts are gone! '

Did you check under your bed?
Another squirrel joking said,
'Of course I did! ' the squirrel said,
'I am the Squirrel head'.

Maybe you forgot you've ate,
Autumn now, it's not too late,
Just look for more, Squirrel Head,
An elderly wise squirrel said.

poem by Philo Yan
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The Escape of the Old Grey Squirrel

Old Grey Squirrel might have been
Almost anything -
Might have been a soldier, sailor,
Tinker, tailor
(Never a beggar-man, though, nor thief).
Might have been, perhaps, a king,
Or an Indian chief.

He remained a City clerk
Doubled on a great high stool,
Totting up, from dawn to dark,
Figures, figures, figures, figures,
Red ink, black ink, double rule,
Tot-tot-totting with his pen,
Up and down and round again -
Curious Old Grey Squirrel.

No one ever really knew
What he did at night,
In his room so near the roof,
Up those steep and narrow stairs.
Old Grey Squirrel wasn't quite
The same as other men.
What he said was always true;
He was like a little child
In a thousand things.
Something shy and delicate,
Cold and grave and undefiled,
Seemed to keep him quite aloof.
You could never call him lonely,
Though he lived with memory there.

When he knelt beside his bed
He had nothing much to say
But the simplest little prayer
Learned in childhood, long ago,
And he didn't know or care
Whether Calvinists might call it
Praying for the dead.

Father, mother, sister, brother -
Memories clear as evening bells;
Yes, the very sort of thing
All your clever little scribblers
Love to satirize and sting,
So let's talk of something else.
He collected stamps, you know,
Commonplace Old Squirrel.

Ah, but could you see him there,

[...] Read more

poem by Alfred Noyes
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My Bay'nit

When first I left Blighty they gave me a bay'nit
And told me it 'ad to be smothered wiv gore;
But blimey! I 'aven't been able to stain it,
So far as I've gone wiv the vintage of war.
For ain't it a fraud! when a Boche and yours truly
Gits into a mix in the grit and the grime,
'E jerks up 'is 'ands wiv a yell and 'e's duly
Part of me outfit every time.

Left, right, Hans and Fritz!
Goose step, keep up yer mits!
Oh my, Ain't it a shyme!
Part of me outfit every time.

At toasting a biscuit me bay'nit's a dandy;
I've used it to open a bully beef can;
For pokin' the fire it comes in werry 'andy;
For any old thing but for stickin' a man.
'Ow often I've said: "'Ere, I'm goin' to press you
Into a 'Un till you're seasoned for prime,"
And fiercely I rushes to do it, but bless you!
Part of me outfit every time.

Lor, yus; DON'T they look glad?
Right O! 'Owl Kamerad!
Oh my, always the syme!
Part of me outfit every time.

I'm 'untin' for someone to christen me bay'nit,
Some nice juicy Chewton wot's fightin' in France;
I'm fairly down-'earted -- 'ow CAN yer explain it?
I keeps gettin' prisoners every chance.
As soon as they sees me they ups and surrenders,
Extended like monkeys wot's tryin' to climb;
And I uses me bay'nit -- to slit their suspenders --
Part of me outfit every time.

Four 'Uns; lor, wot a bag!
'Ere, Fritz, sample a fag!
Oh my, ain't it a gyme!
Part of me outfit every time.

poem by Robert William Service
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Admit The Rat

I got a story
Bout all these rats
All the sewer rats
All these gun rats
Im talkin bout all these gold diggen rats
These hood rats
My grandmothers a rat
Shes just an old school rat
My mothers a rat
Shes just a high class rat
My sisters rats
Shes just a middle class rat
My cousins rats
They just low class rats
Im tired of rats tryin to get into my boyz pockets
Im tired of rats tryin to ride around in my cars
Im tired of rats talkin all that jibber jabber to their friends
But ond day these rats are gonna be straight
No diss to rats
Cuz there are some rats that I love too
My message to you today is admit the rat in you
To all women admitt the rat in you
Admit the rat in you
Admit the rat in you
Admit the rat in you

song performed by Next
Added by Lucian Velea
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Admit The Rat (Interlude)

I got a story
bout all these rats
all the sewer rats
all these gun rats
im talkin bout all these gold diggen rats
these hood rats
my grandmothers a rat
she's just an old school rat
my mothers a rat
she's just a high class rat
my sisters rats
she's just a middle class rat
my cousins rats
they just low class rats
im tired of rats tryin to get into my boyz pockets
im tired of rats tryin to ride around in my cars
im tired of rats talkin all that jibber jabber to their friends
but ond day these rats are gonna be straight
no diss to rats
cuz there are some rats that i love too
my message to you today is admit the rat in you
to all women admitt the rat in you
admit the rat in you
admit the rat in you
admit the rat in you

song performed by Next
Added by Lucian Velea
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The Cat and the Dog

Once upon a time a cat
And a dog, silently followed by a rat
Set out on a journey
To the land of Timberney
The cat and the dog were the best of friends
And their ties of friendship was hard to mend

The dog suddenly noticed the rat
And have him a friendly pat
In the forest of Kellogg
Sat the cat, the rat and the dog
On a well built log
They heartily ate their lunch
Munch, munch, chomp, chomp, munch
All of them ate, ate and ate
Not noticing that at this rate
They will never reach Timberney
In order to complete their journey

Excited with this new friendship
All the three went to have a sip
From the nearby lake
And spent nearly an hour for this sake
It had suddenly, suddenly become dark
And the dog told them to mark
The tree on which each of them slept
And the rat meanwhile wept and wept and wept
For it had fear of the dark
And thus ended Day 1 of the journey they had embarked

In the middle of the night
The cat woke up and sat upright
The dog too was awake
Staring at a lengthy black snake
They began to hatch a plan
Whispering as low as the possibly can
The cat woke up the rat
And tempted him to eat a piece of dead bad
Innocently the rat came up to the cat
And together they sat
For a dinner that never was
But both them hogged without a pause

The dog as per the plan hid
Stealthily behind a bush in a bid
To have the rat for dinner
As the light grew dimmer and dimmer
Like a hungry lion he pounced
On the rat who was trounced
And there lay a dead example

[...] Read more

poem by anonym
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You can't be friends with a squirrel! A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit.

quote by Sarah Jessica Parker
Added by Lucian Velea
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You Couldnt Be Cuter

You couldnt be cuter
Plus that
You couldnt be smarter
Plus that
Intelligent face
You have a disgrace-
Ful charm
For me
You couldnt be keener
You look so fresh from the cleaner
You are the little grand slam
Ill take to my fam-
Ily
My ma will show you an album of me thatll bore you to tears
And youll attract all the relatives we have dodged for years and years
And what will they tell me?
Exactly, what will they tell me
Lets say you couldnt be nicer
Couldnt be sweeter
Couldnt be better
Couldnt be smoother
Couldnt be cuter, baby, than you are
My ma will show you an album of me thatll bore you to tears
And youll attract all the relatives we have dodged for years and years
And what will they tell me?
I know just what they will tell me
Theyll say you couldnt be nicer
Couldnt be sweeter
Couldnt be better
Couldnt be smoother
Couldnt be cuter, baby, than you are

song performed by Ella Fitzgerald
Added by Lucian Velea
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I Think I Smell A Rat

Oh I think I smell a rat
I think I smell a rat
all you little kids
seem to think you know
just where it's at
I think I smell a rat
walking down the street
carrying a baseball bat
I think I smell a rat
Oh I think I smell a rat
I think I smell a rat
all you little kids
seem to think you know
just where is at
I think I smell a rat
treating your mother and father
like a welcome mat
I think I smell a rat

song performed by White Stripes
Added by Lucian Velea
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Smile Rap

Rat was
King...
Cat poet was
Come...

Rat king did not
Run...
Cat sing the song
For rat king...

Rat did not
Happy...
Cat bad words
Useses for rat's...

Politikal...
And rats rabery...
Rat told to solders
Arest the poet cat

'Down down rat...'
Sonded...
Cat poet...
Rat smile rap...!

poem by Otteri Selvakumar
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Jungeland

(early version)
Well the rangers had a home-coming in harlem late last night
And the magic rat piloted his sleek machine across the jersey state line
Barefoot girl sits drinking warm beer on the hood of an old dodge
In the soft summer rain
Rat rolls up his pants, together theyd make a stab at romance
And move down flamingo lane
Well now the maximum lawmen they run down the flamingo chasing the rat
And the barefoot girl
But the kids they live like shadows in empty doorways
(but they live like shadows in the vacant doorways)
Always silent, holding hands
The rat pulls her close (the rat pulls mary close)
And from the churches to the jails there is silence in the world
(all is silent in the world)
For tonight theyd take their chance
Down here in jungleland
Well thers a crazy kind of light tonight
Brighter than the one that sparkles for prophets
Brighter than the giant exxon sign that brings this fair city light
Theres an opera out on the turnpike, theres a ballet being fought outside
The
Alley
Well the cops they let their faces show and rips this holy night
The streets alive with tough-kid jets in nova-light machines
Boys flash guitars like bayonets and rip holes in their jeans
Then the hungry and the haunted explode into rock n roll bands
They face off against each other when they meet
Down here in jungleland
The streetss on fire in a classic death waltz
Between the masters of flesh and fantasy
The poets down here dont write nothin at all, they just stand and and let
It all be
And in the quick of the night they reach for their moment to make an honest
Stand
But they wind up wounded, not rightly dead, down here in jungleland - yes
They do
Oh beneath the city their hearts beat, soul cool engines tired and brave
Oh as the young (jungle) girls stand by fire angels fallen in the city
In the tunnels of machines theyll hear the screams
Drowned out by the roarin trains
Them rats above, oh locked in love
The rat saves her from the edge of an on-coming train
That angel rides a...
Down here in jungleland - oh yes they do
They hear the animals sing - oh oh oh
Alternative verses:
===================
In the parking lots the visionairies are dressed in the latest rage
As the spanish angels dance soft and low in a blacked arcade

[...] Read more

song performed by Bruce Springsteen
Added by Lucian Velea
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Rat In Mi Kitchen

(chorus)
There's a rat in me kitchen what am I gonna do?
There's a rat in me kitchen what am I gonna go?
I'm gonna fix that rat thats what i'm gonna do,
I'm gonna fix that rat.
When you open your mouth you don't talk, you shout
And you give every body the blame,
But when they catch you up,
They will shut you up
And you got no one to blame
(chorus)
There's a rat in me kitchen ........
When you out on the street,
You practice lies and deceipt
And you scandalize my name
But when I catch you up
I'm gonna pull you up
I'm gonna check-out inside your brain
(chorus)
There's a rat in me kitchen .......
When yo deh pon the scene,
You make everyone scream
Because they know your so unjust
But when they catch you up
They will kick you up
Because you someone they cannot trust
(chorus)
There's a rat in me kitchen .......
You invade my space
Make me feel disgraced
And you just don't give a damn
If I had my way
If I had my say
I'd like to see you hang
(chorus)
There's a rat in me kitchen .....
(repeat chorus and fade)

song performed by Ub40
Added by Lucian Velea
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The Cat and the Rat

The pudgy, playful cat said to the rather weary rat,
“I have to keep chasing you so that I don’t get too fat.”
The rather weary rat said he didn’t understand.
“Don’t you chase me for the next meal you’ve planned? ”

The cat laughed and asked, “Why would I want that?
Without you, who would I chase, you silly, weary rat? ”
“I’m tired and sure don’t care if you do get fat.”
Said the more than rather angry weary rat.

At that the rather weary rat decided to ask,
“Can we be friends or is that too tough a task? ”
The pudgy, playful cat frowned and wanted to know,
“Weary rat, just how fat do you want me to grow?
If I stop chasing you, that won’t be too wise,
Since you’re the only way that I can exercise.”

The rather weary rat started to sob and wail.
All this running had made him quite weak and frail.
Then he had an idea that might stop the cat from getting fat.
So he simply asked the pudgy, “Why don't you chase you
Then you can chase it in every place you want to be.”
The pudgy, playful cat had never, ever thought of that.
Now for sure he knew he would never become fat.
He smiled and said, “My chasing you must end
Because, rather weary rat, you are now my best friend!

poem by Gregory Huyette
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The Rat

Damn that rat!
I could hear it
scuffling about
in the closet.

He'd been there
some time
and I'd heard
footsteps.

Then there were
the phone calls,
from a female
called, Ratessa

Ratessa - called
every day, wanting
to speak to my rat.
No excuses.

Mostly I'm bad
at spotting clues
but this was
see through.

What to do?
I called environmental health.
The rat catcher
came quickly.

He was a big, burly bloke
with dark eyebrows,
tattoos and a
six pack.

‘It's alright love',
he shouted.
‘I'll get your rat,
you leave this to me.'

I led him in,
straight through to the back.
He stood, aghast,
when he saw my rat

‘I know you' he snapped
‘I've seen you
at our back door
with my Mrs.

[...] Read more

poem by Ruth Walters
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Nightstalker On A Mission

A fat and lazy pussycat
was eying, up a tree, a rat.
The pussycat had been neglected
since nasty flaws had been detected
in her behaviour as such,
though in a way it was not much
to those who love their pussycats,
prefer them over rats and bats.

It seems that, in the dark of night
right after she would have a bite
of what they sell in shops as kibbles,
apparently these crunchy nibbles
do stimulate motility,
which means they work the pebbles free
inside the cat's long feline gut,
soon after, they then leave her butt.

And she had long been in the habit
to dropp those pellets like a rabbit
wherever there was room to spare.
But many owners do not care
to wake to early morning fragrance
of what reminds of smelly vagrants.

In any case the cat had seen
the rat up in the tree, so green.
And contemplated climbing up
into the tree, up to the top.
As you might know, most any cat
will not turn down a meal of rat.

So, cat got ready to ascend
the giant tree, and there to end
the life of one of nature's pests,
who's prowling through the hidden nests.
And, with a sudden burst of speed
the cat was on her way, indeed.
She climbed and climbed with skill and stealth,
up in the tree. The future health
of one scared rat seemed on the block,
as midnight struck on the church clock
the cat was almost within reach
of its next meal when, with a screech,
the rat jumped up to spread his wings
(the cat had not expected things
to go so wrong at this late stage) ,
what followed was a noisy rage,
and, first the rat and then the cat
flew off the tree, one landed at

[...] Read more

poem by Herbert Nehrlich
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