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Relationships are so much a rerun of our parental relationships. We're rerunning the relationship they were in together and we're rerunning the relationship we had with them with our lover.

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Lover Lover Lover

I asked my father,
I said, father change my name.
The one Im using now its covered up
With fear and filth and cowardice and shame.
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me,
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me.
He said, I locked you in this body,
I meant it as a kind of trial.
You can use it for a weapon,
Or to make some woman smile.
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me,
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me.
Then let me start again, I cried,
Please let me start again,
I want a face thats fair this time,
I want a spirit that is calm.
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me,
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me.
I never never turned aside, he said,
I never walked away.
It was you who built the temple,
It was you who covered up my face.
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me,
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me.
And may the spirit of this song,
May it rise up pure and free.
May it be a shield for you,
A shield against the enemy.
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me,
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me.
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me,
Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me.

song performed by Leonard CohenReport problemRelated quotes
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Luv Me, Luv Me

Shaggy:
Original lover, lover, mm, yeah, uh (yeah)
Catch a groove girl, catch a groove, thats right
Lover, lover, lover, mmm, shaggy, dj
A who da man dat love to make you moist and wet (uh)
A who da man dat love to make you moan and sweat (uh)
A who da man dat love to make you scream out yes (mr. lover, mr. lover)
A who da man dat love to make you moist and wet (uh)
A who da man that love to make you moan and sweet (uh)
A who da man dat love to make you scream out yes, naw (mr. lover)
Sugar
Sweet, succulent and fine
A twinkling eye on my darling divine
I love the way you move all the way youre designed
Your only lines are my mind, forget the corny line
Now let me hit you off with this question sign
You seem to be the type for me to wine and dine
A little candlelight dinner toasted over some wine
Well, I will hit you off with this lyrical rhyme
Now mr. lover keep her rockin, mr. lover keep her rockin
Mr. lover keep her rockin and swing
Now mr. lover keep her rockin, mr. lover keep her rockin
Mr. lover keep her rockin and swing
Chorus:
Janet:
Ooh boy, I love you so
Never, ever, ever gonna let you go (thats right)
Once I get my hands on you (luv me, luv me, luv me sex machine)
Ooh boy, I love you so (mmm hmm)
Never, ever, ever gonna let you go (thats right, uh)
I hope you feel the same way too (you know dat)
Shaggy:
Step in my caravan of love
So I can love, gonna give you hotter rubs
Dem ever wet kissies wit dem brazen hugs
And now your sweet, silky body on my persian rug
While we sippin coke from da same ol mug
Im readin fortune cookies from the chines proverb
It had some great stuff written in it with some cool rub-a-dub
A little ol reminisce in the hot tub, huh
Janet:
Mr. lover, mr. lover, mr. lover (lets fog up some window sills, girl, uh)
Mr. lover (catch a groove back girl, catch a groove)
Mr. lover, mr. lover
Chorus
Shaggy:
Girlie, girlie
You woke up a real love machine
Girlie, girlie
I live to make your beat

[...] Read more

song performed by Janet JacksonReport problemRelated quotes
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Night Bring Me My Lover

Night bring me my lover, night
Bring me my lover, night
The night has brought me you, ooooh
Night bring me my lover, night
Bring me my lover, night
The night has brought me you, ooh
Night, bring me my lover
Baby, night is sweet?
To each other thats the way we meet
I went all day for night to come
When I ? so easy
Do you want my lover, baby
Exchanging smiles and glances,
Just by to take my chances
Night bring me my lover, night
Bring me my lover, night
The night has brought me you, ooooh
Night bring me my lover, night
Bring me my lover, night
The night has brought me you, ooh
Night, bring me my lover
Youre the living cruel
To satisfy each other, thats the loving truth
One day is all I want belong to ? baby
Thats the way I found you, lover?
Each other
Nights brought us one another
Night bring me my lover, night
Bring me my lover, night
The night has brought me you, ooooh
Night bring me my lover, night
Bring me my lover, night
The night has brought me you, ooh
(Im so high) Im in love tonight
(so high) I think our love is so right
(so high) ? tomorrow-morrow
Night (bring me my lover)
Bring me my lover,
Night
(bring me my lover)
Bring me my lover, night
The night has brought me you, ooooh
Night (bring me my lover)
Bring me my lover, night
(bring me my lover)
Bring me my lover, night
The night has brought me you, ooh
Night (bring me my lover)
Bring me my lover, night
(bring me my lover)

[...] Read more

song performed by Gloria EstefanReport problemRelated quotes
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Awesum Luvr

Yo fight, yo fight, turn the mic up... yeahh
QT!
Old people tell me I'm still too young
To take a lady's hand and give it the tounge
But what do they know about puberty?
About being 14, and all filled with needs
Mary k. Latourneau think you knew the truth
It's all the young dudes, who's got the best moves, yeah
Call me the heartthrob that was choice
I'm just a nice guy with a pretty good voice
If you're a girl with humor inside [noahsbestfriend@noahsmom.com]
Come get with me and girl I'm gonna make you smile
If you get scared, I'll take you by the hand
I'll show you heaven, I will be your dream man
Wanna be your awesome lover (I wanna be)
Gonna be your number one man
Wanna be a real heartbreaker
The best lover (best lover) in all the land
Wanna be your awesome lover
Wanna be your awesome lover, lover
Awesome lover
The best lover (the best lover) in all the land
Are you sick of guys who come on strong?
Who just want to see you wearing a tight thong
I don't even know what a thong is
But I got an A+ on the Teen Charm Quiz [noahsbestfriend@noahsmom.com]
So sit back, relax, and I won't hit on you Just let yourself drown in my big baby blues
Okay so I'm older than your average teen
But baby I will treat you just like a queen
I'm wise and mature and so generous too
And I'll never use cuss words like hump or screw
A smooth older man
Is just what you need
Cause lovin' is better at a way slower speed
Wanna be your awesome lover (awesome lover)
Wanna be your number one man (number one man)
Wanna be your real heartbreaker (real heartbreaker)
The best lover (best lover) in all the land (in all the land)
Awesome lover (wanna be)
Wanna be your awesome lover, lover (I wanna be, I got to be)
Awesome lover..(your best lover)
The best lover (best lover) in all the land
Some ladies like guys who treat them like crap
Has lots of tattoos and is all into rap
Guess what, that's me, your own gangsta toy
If you're the kind girl who loves a real bad boy
(if you want some more, c'mon)/p Wanna be your
Wanna be your
Awesome lover
Wanna be your number one man

[...] Read more

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Awesome Lover

Awesome lover
Yo fight, yo fight turn this the mic up... yeahh
Qt...
Most people tell me Im still too young (cmon)
To take a ladies hand and give it the tounge
What do they know about puberty? (yeah)
About being 14, and living with needs
Mary k luton I bet she knew the truth (say what)
Its all about whose got the best boobs yeah
Call my the heartthrob that wasnt choice (yeah take it)
Im just a nice guy with a pretty dope voice
If youre a girl with humor inside
Come get with me and girl Im gonna make you smile
If you get scared, Ill take you by the hand (cmon)
Ill show you heaven, I will be your dream man
Gonna be your awesome lover
Gonna be your number one man
Wanna be your real heartbreaker
The best lover (best lover) in all the land
Wanna be your awesome lover
Wanna be your awesome lover, lover
Awesome lover..
The best lover (best lover) in all the land
Are you sick of guys who come on too strong? (thats chad)
Who just want to see you wearing a tight thong
I dont even know what a thong is (what cha say)
But I got an a+ on the teen chump quiz!
So sit back, relax,
And I wont hit on you
Just let yourself drown in my big baby blues...
Okay so Im older than your average teen (hey doug)
But baby I will treat you just like a queen
Im wise and mature and so generous too (mmm)
And Ill never use cuss words like hump or screw
A smooth older man
Is just what you need
Cause lovin is better at a way slower speed...
Wanna be your awesome lover
Wanna be your number one man
Wanna be your real heartbreaker
The best lover (best lover) in all the land
Wanna be your awesome lover
Wanna be your awesome lover, lover
Awesome lover..
The best lover (best lover) in all the land
Some ladies like guys who treat them like crap
Has lots of tattoos and is all into rap
Well guess what, thats me, your own gangsta toy.
If youre the kind of girl who loves a real bad boy...
Gonna be your

[...] Read more

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Mamas Got A Lover

Mamas got a lover
A painter I am told
Shes getting out of real estate
For the art scene down in old soho
Art scene down in old soho
Mamas got a lover
He owns a gallery
She says he likes collages but
The moneys in graffiti
Moneys in graffiti
Mamas got a lover
I met him yesterday
She says she hopes I like him
Maybe Ill send him a card on fathers day
Fathers day
Mamas got a lover
Theyre backing a film
Its about a working mother
Who gives birth to black and white siamese twins
Black and white siamese twins
Mamas got a lover
Hes got something to say
He says hes into dirt and rot
The essence of urban decay
Urban decay
Mamas got a lover
We met yesterday
She says she hopes I like him
Ill send him a card on fathers day
On fathers day
Mamas got a lover
I met him yesterday
Shes starting a new chapter
I wish she was on the last page
The last page
Mamas got a lover
We met yesterday
She says she hopes I like him
Ill send him a card on fathers day
Fathers day
Mamas got a lover (mamas got a lover)
Mamas got a lover (mamas got a lover), oh
Mamas got a lover (mamas got a lover)
My mamas got a lover (mamas got a lover)
(mamas got a lover)
(mamas got a lover)
(mamas got a lover)
(mamas got a lover)
(mamas got a lover)
(mamas got a lover)

[...] Read more

song performed by Lou ReedReport problemRelated quotes
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Lover Doll

(words & music by wayne - silver)
Lover doll, oh lover doll
Lover doll, lover doll
Youre the cutest lover doll
That I ever did ever see
Let me tell you lover doll
You were meant, just meant for me
On the first time that I saw you
How I fell for your cuddly charms
Lover doll Im crazy for you
Let me rock you in my arms
Im so glad I found you
Never thought dollies came full grown
Im gonna tie a ribbon around you
Wrap you up and take you home
I would never treat you badly
Like a cast away broken toy
Lover doll I love you madly
Let me be your lover boy
Im so glad I found you
Never thought dollies came full grown
Im gonna tie a ribbon around you
Wrap you up and take you home
I would never treat you badly
Like a cast away broken toy
Lover doll I love you madly
Let me be your lover boy
Lover doll, lover doll
Lover doll, lover doll
Lover doll, lover doll
Let me be your lover boy
Lover doll, lover doll
Lover doll, lover doll
Lover doll, lover doll
Let me be your lover boy
Let me be your lover boy
Let me be your lover boy

song performed by Elvis PresleyReport problemRelated quotes
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I Dont Know Your Name

Emily:
I walked into my favorite place one night
Id just gotten back from a lecture
And I was feeling kind of uptight
And at the edge of the bar there was this guy
And you know I wasnt really looking
But I caught him out of the corner of my eye
The next thing I know he was moving my way
I thought he wanted to talk
But this is what he had to say
Amy:
I dont know your name babe
But I want to be your lover
Yall sing it with me
I dont know your name babe
But I want to be your lover
Your lover your lover your lover
One time or another baby
I want to be your lover
Emily:
I have to admit I was a little bit surprised
But I wasnt really scared cause I was twice his size
So I said to myself, okay, Ill play his game
And when he turned to me
I gave him my name
Amy:
I know your name babe
But I got to know your number
I know your name babe
But I got to know your number your number
I said one time or another baby
Im gonna be your lover
Yeah I wanna be your lover
Emily:
Well I said to myself this guy is persistent
Hes a little bit dumb but at least hes consistent
I tried to talk cool but when we touched I went under
I made a quick decision and I gave him my number
Amy:
I know your number
But I dont know what to say babe
Emily:
Thats ok
Amy:
I know your number
Your number babe
But I dont know what to say to you
Say to you say to you say to you darling
Oh it dont matter anyway no
I dont talk when Im make love to you babe

[...] Read more

song performed by Indigo GirlsReport problemRelated quotes
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Solomon

As thro' the Psalms from theme to theme I chang'd,
Methinks like Eve in Paradice I rang'd;
And ev'ry grace of song I seem'd to see,
As the gay pride of ev'ry season, she.
She gently treading all the walks around,
Admir'd the springing beauties of the ground,
The lilly glist'ring with the morning dew,
The rose in red, the violet in blew,
The pink in pale, the bells in purple rows,
And tulips colour'd in a thousand shows:
Then here and there perhaps she pull'd a flow'r
To strew with moss, and paint her leafy bow'r;
And here and there, like her I went along,
Chose a bright strain, and bid it deck my song.

But now the sacred Singer leaves mine eye,
Crown'd as he was, I think he mounts on high;
Ere this Devotion bore his heav'nly psalms,
And now himself bears up his harp and palms.
Go, saint triumphant, leave the changing sight,
So fitted out, you suit the realms of light;
But let thy glorious robe at parting go,
Those realms have robes of more effulgent show;
It flies, it falls, the flutt'ring silk I see,
Thy son has caught it and he sings like thee,
With such election of a theme divine,
And such sweet grace, as conquers all but thine.

Hence, ev'ry writer o'er the fabled streams,
Where frolick fancies sport with idle dreams,
Or round the sight enchanted clouds dispose,
Whence wanton cupids shoot with gilded bows;
A nobler writer, strains more brightly wrought,
Themes more exulted, fill my wond'ring thought:
The parted skies are track'd with flames above,
As love descends to meet ascending love;
The seasons flourish where the spouses meet,
And earth in gardens spreads beneath their feet.
This fresh-bloom prospect in the bosom throngs,
When Solomon begins his song of songs,
Bids the rap'd soul to Lebanon repair,
And lays the scenes of all his action there,
Where as he wrote, and from the bow'r survey'd
The scenting groves, or answ'ring knots he made,
His sacred art the sights of nature brings,
Beyond their use, to figure heav'nly things.

Great son of God! whose gospel pleas'd to throw
Round thy rich glory, veils of earthly show,
Who made the vineyard oft thy church design,

[...] Read more

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Patrick White

The Object Of Our Devotion

The object of our devotion
finally asks from us
the very eyes that dazzled us into obedience,
and leads us like a wind,
the last breath we'll ever take,
in the guise of a woman
who beckons at the top of the stairwells and thermals
where the hawk wheels,
a spark of the sun,
to follow her down deeper into a darkness
that even the dead shun
like the deleted shadows of noon,
if I would be her perfect lover.
If I would be her perfect lover,
and the fever of my demon
not go mad looking for her
like water on the moon
to ease the fire, ease the fire
that blazes in my bones,
I must abdicate my consummation
in the intimate otherness of me
and forfeit my eyes
to the deathly absence of the sea
that has unmoored me like a wave.
If I would be her perfect lover
and lift the veil
to see the face she only shows the stars,
I must take myself down
like a torn sail in a storm
and let the current heave me where it will,
the lonely word whose endless sentence is a soul.
I must say her beauty,
I must root her flower in the starfields
and vanquish time from the garden;
if I would be her perfect lover,
I must enlarge my emptiness like space
to linger with the subtle fragrances
of the silks and auroras of her mind
that blow the stars around like dust
and pick the galaxies like dandelions
and raise them like suns above the streaming skylines of her hair
flowing out behind her, the wake of a waterbird
landing like a blossom, the moon, a wing-weary emotion
on the night sky
she keeps to herself
when she bathes alone in the milk of the undulant light
on the other side of her eyes.
If I would be her perfect lover,
and my heart, and my blood,
my mind and my spirit, my art,

[...] Read more

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Broken Relationships

Wanting to mend them.
And to fix.
Those Broken relationships,
We came to know but miss.

Wanting to mend them.
And to fix.
Those broken relationships,
We came to know but miss.

Forgiving is easier when that act is done.
But to forget is not as quick,
As is wished.

Forgiving is easier when that act is done.
But to forget is not as quick,
As is wished.

Broken relationships,
Are hard to mend when they end.
Broken relationships,
Are hard to mend when they end.

Wanting to mend them.
And to fix.
Those Broken relationships,
We came to know but miss.

Wanting to mend them.
And to fix.
Those broken relationships,
We came to know but miss.

Forgiving is easier when that act is done.
But to forget is not as quick,
As is wished.

Broken relationships,
Are hard to mend when they end.
Broken relationships,
Are hard to mend when they end.
Broken relationships,
Are hard to mend when they end.
Broken relationships,
Are hard to mend when they end.

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Beware! Grown Up Children!

Children need parental love,
Children utilise parental services,
Children get life with parental guidance,
Children want parental money and property;

As children grow and earn on their own,
Parents get older and senior in their turn,
Parents getting older and lose their memory,
asks many doubts and queries everyday;

Grown up children are not patient
nowadays for every parental query,
They care for their own children only
and blow up their parents to old-age homes!

The history will repeat,
Beware! Grown up children! !

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I am o.k. you are o.k.

‘I lost my pen’
‘Don’t worry, I shall get you one’
A child like question
And an expected parental reply.
I am o.k., you are o.k.

‘I lost my pen’
‘I know you will do only that’
Parent reply belied the question.
I am o.k. You are not o.k.

‘I lost my pen’
‘You can borrow from me’
A child-like question.
An adult like answer.
I am o.k. You are o.k.

‘Is the bus late?
‘Which bus comes in time?
An adult seeking an adult
But received a parent reply.
I am o.k. You are not.

‘Is the bus late? ’
‘Yes, heard only ten minutes’
Both responded as adults.
I am o.k. You are o.k.

‘Let us play hide and seek’
‘Yes, let me hide first’
A child sought from a child
And received it.
I am o.k. You are o.k.

‘Let us play hide and seek’
‘No, this is not the time’
The reply is parental
And belied the question.
I am o.k. You are not.

‘Let us play hide and seek’
‘Yes. Then we should read’
A child and an adult reaction
I am o.k. You are o.k.

‘You should not smoke’
‘Yes. I shall cut it’
A parental question.
An adult reply.
I am o.k. You are o.k.

[...] Read more

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Truly, Madly, Deeply

(a. bell / v. clarke)
(woah...oh, woah...oh)
How ever hard they tried to hold you back,
So you were stronger.
If theres a slightest fray of hope,
Or glimmer in your eye.
Take another lover,
But I will get you in the end.
There will be no other lover, (take another lover)
I will say: I love you.
Love me madly, truly, deeply (I love you...take another lover)
Love me madly, truly, deeply (woah)
Take another lover,
But I will get you in the end.
There will be no other lover, (take another lover)
I will say: I love you.
Every night you live to satisfy
Your pains of hunger.
But as if your name were written out
In lies across the sky.
Take another lover,
But I will get you in the end.
There will be no other lover, (take another lover)
I will say: I love you.
Love me madly, truly, deeply (I love you...take another lover)
Love me madly, truly, deeply (woah)
Take another lover,
But I will get you in the end.
There will be no other lover, (take another lover)
I will say...
How ever hard they tried to hold you back,
So you were stronger.
Taking, no taking, taking, no taking,
Taking, no taking, taking no lover.
Taking, no taking, taking, no taking,
Taking, no taking, taking no lover.

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Soul To Soul

Someone along the way derailed your train
And Im having a real hard time
Getting any love thru your defenses
You listen to your heat but I know how well
You listen to your heart
If this is the real thing
Then I want more from you than flesh and blood
So, soul to soul
I know how it feels
Between lover to lover (were gonna be)
So, soul to soul
Like a magnet to steel
Just like lover to lover (were gonna be)
We dont make love so much
Have a bedroom crucifixion
Any love that you receive only seems to go skin deep
You lost the key, dont throw away the house
Tho I love your flesh and blood
This is the real thing
And I want more from you than skin to skin
So, soul to soul
I know how it feels
Between lover to lover (were gonna be)
So, soul to soul
Like a magnet to steel
Just like lover to lover (were gonna be)
Somewhere theres an altar she lays herself across it
And she hands me the blade but I dont, I dont stick it in
So, soul to soul and the faithful all kneel
Every sister and brother (were gonna be)
So, soul to soul and I wish it was real
Just like lover to lover (were gonna be)
And if this aint what you want
You better tell me now baby
Cause I want more from you than skin to skin
So, soul to soul
I know how it feels
Between lover to lover (were gonna be)
So, soul to soul
Like a magnet to steel
Just like lover to lover (were gonna be)
Somewhere theres an alter she lays herself across it
And she hands me the blade but I cant, I wont stick it in
So, soul to soul and the faithful will kneel
Every sister and brother (were gonna be)
So, soul to soul and I wish it was real
Just like lover to lover (were gonna be)
Soul to soul

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I Dont Wanna Fight

I got a hole in my head
I got a hole in my head
Id be better off dead
I got a hole in my head
I dont wanna fight
I dont wanna fight
I dont wanna fight
Im a lover, lover, lover
Youre always laughing at me
Youre always laughing at me
Yeah, when nothings really funny
Youre always laughing at me
I dont wanna fight
I dont wanna fight
I dont wanna fight
Im a lover, lover, lover
Im a lover, lover, lover
You got a pretty face
You got a pretty face
But its such a waste
You got a pretty face
I dont wanna fight
I dont wanna fight
I dont wanna fight
Im a lover, lover, lover
Im a lover, lover, lover

song performed by Tom PettyReport problemRelated quotes
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Cruel Young Lover

Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Just because you can
You treat me like a fool
But just because you can
Dont make it right
Can it be so hard
To be a little kind
And you could be here
With me tonight
Ive got feelings
Dont be unkind
Feelings
Dont be unkind
Feelings
Stay with me tonight
Youve been stealing
Thats so unkind
Stealing
A heart, a mind
Stealing
Stay with me tonight
Cruel young lover
Blow your mind out
Time will come when
You will find out
Time will take your cruel power away
Cruel young lover
Try to stand out
Will it always pay
To bland out?
Time will take your cruel power away
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Do you hear me?
Once again youre gone
Somewhere in the night
Disappearing
Leaving me alone
The lure of city streets
The pull of unknown souls
The overpowering draw

[...] Read more

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Let Go The Passion

memories come and go,
my rocking chair work out the flow.
Sweet fire keep the cold heart warm,
away from blurry past and the storm.

Sweet child she was, so,
crawling here and there and go.
I remember when settled in my arms,
that smile, ever full of charms.

Let go the passion, man,
this is not your track or way.
Let go the passion, man,
no rerun of times or replay.

Growing up so fast now,
spreading love by the vow.
Hatred didn't know this place,
that lies inside her with the grace.

A teenager now, full of hopes,
full of dreams beyond my scopes.
You became like her number one fan,
you're thirty and she's ninteen, man.

Let go the passion, man,
this is not your track or way.
Let go the passion, man,
no rerun of times or replay.

Looks like a taboo of some sort,
no touch, no smile of that sort.
The sleeping beauty that I missed,
is a full grown woman out of nest.

Her own house, her own man,
her own universe is on the span.
Same laughter still shine through,
despite the age, she really never grew.

Let go the passion, man,
this is not your track or way.
Let go the passion, man,
no rerun of times or replay.

Let go the passion man,
your hopes are not for today.
Let go the passion man,
your dreams, down should lay.
down, should lay...

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Marriage Bonds

“I never looked for any marriage bond, ”
said Heloise to Abelard.
She knew that marriage is no magic wand,
despite the popular canard
that it consolidates relationships
that would be broken otherwise.
A lovely face can’t launch a thousand ships,
and marriage fails as a franchise
unless, instead of drifting without ease
into the boredom of routine,
the married couple sails like ships on seas,
not stretching in a limousine,
but tossed by waves whose turbulence ensures
that all emotions that they’ve felt
will amplify and not disarm amours,
providing them not a lifelovebelt,
but surfboard with which they can catch the waves,
not drowning since they do not tread
upon the other’s dreams, not bound like slaves
to rings that bound them when first wed.

Inspired by Katie Roiphe’s review ofA Vindication of Love” by Cristina Nehring in the NYT Book Review, June 21 (“Feverish Limitations”) :
Feverish Liaisons, Katie Rophe, June 21,2009
Publishers. $24.99
For most of us love is largely a matter of shared mortgage payments, evenings curled up on the couch in front of a video, or maybe a night in a hotel for an anniversary. But Cristina Nehring has a different idea. Her ardent polemic, “A Vindication of Love, ” puts forward a darker, more demanding vision of love. This is not, it should be said right away, a book without ambition: the subtitle is “Reclaiming Romance for the Twenty-First Century, ” though it is not exactly romance Nehring is writing about, but a more difficult, vital image of passion she believes we have lost. “We have been pragmatic and pedestrian about our erotic lives for too long, ” she writes, and in an examination of real and invented figures from the Wife of Bath to Frida Kahlo, she revels in love affairs that do not rely on our more hackneyed narratives. The result of Nehring’s literary and historical inquiry is a celebration of the wilder, messier connections. Her heroes and heroines tend to die, like Young Werther, who shoots himself; or try to die, like Mary Wollstonecraft, who throws herself off a bridge; or suffer, like Abelard and Heloise, one of whom is castrated and one of whom ends up in a nunnery. And yet Nehring admires these flamboyant men and women for the creative force of their affairs, for their ability to live outside the lines, for the ferocity of their feelings. She sees our modern goals of marriage, security and comfort as limited and sad, and quotes approvingly Heloise’s statement to Abelard: “‘I looked for no marriage bond, ’ she flashed. ‘I never sought anything in you but yourself.’ ”
In her most provocative and interesting chapters, Nehring argues for the value of suffering, for the importance of failure. Our idea of a contented married ending is too cozy and tame for her. We yearn for what she calls “strenuously exhibitionistic happiness” — think of family photos on Facebook — but instead we should focus on the fullness and intensity of emotion. She writes of Margaret Fuller: “Fuller’s failures are several times more sumptuous than other folks’ successes. And perhaps that is something we need to admit about failure: It can well be more sumptuous than success.... Somewhere in our collective unconscious we know — even now — that to have failed is to have lived.” Nehring sees in the grandeur of feeling a kind of heroism, even if the relationship doesn’t take conventional form or endure in the conventional way. For Nehring, one senses, true failure is to drift comfortably along in a dull relationship, to spend precious years of life in a marriage that is not exciting or satisfying, to live cautiously, responsibly. Is the strength of feeling redeemed in the blaze of passion even if it does not end happily? she asks. Is contentment too soft and modest a goal? Elsewhere, Nehring interrogates our steadfast insistence on balanced, healthy relationships, our readiness to condemn doomed, impossible entanglements. She argues that it may in fact be a sign of health to enter into a relationship that is turbulent, demanding or unorthodox. She praises long-distance relationships, arduous relationships, relationships with men who are elusive, relationships the therapeutic culture adamantly opposes. She asks, “Could it be that the choice of a challenging love object signals strength and resourcefulness rather than insecurity and psychological damage, as we so often hear? ”

6/26/09

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Too Funky

Hey, youre just too funky for me,
I gotta get inside of you,
And Ill show you heaven if you let me.
Hey you just too funky for me,
I gotta get inside, (I gotta get inside)
I gotta get inside of you (so then you will that be).
I watch your fingers working overtime (overtime),
I got to thinking that they should be mine. oh!
Id love to see you naked baby,
Id like to think that sometime maybe
Tonight, if thats all right. yeah!
Hey, youre just too funky for me,
I gotta get inside of you , (wont let you go)
Wont let you, no-no
Hey youre just too funky for me,
I gotta get inside, (I gotta get inside)
I gotta get inside of you (Ill let you love me).
I watch you drinkin and I take my time,
I watch you drinkin all that cheap red wine, oh!
Ive got to see you naked baby,
Id like to think that sometime maybe,
Tonight my goals in sight, yeah!
Baby, baby, baby why do you do this to me?
Wont let you go, (wont let you go)
Youre such a, youre such a
Baby, baby, baby why do you do this to me?
Ive got to know. (Ive got to know)
(Im gonna be the kind of lover that you never had)
Hey youre just too funky.
(youre never gonna have another lover in your bed)
Youre just too funky for me.
(would you like me to seduce you, is that what youre trying to tell me? )
(everybody wants a lover like that)
Baby
(everybody wants a lover like that) yeah! yeah!
(everybody wants a lover like that) everybody, everybody
(everybody wants a lover like that)
(is that what you are trying to tell me? )
(everybody wants a lover, everybody wants a lover like that.
Everybody wants a lover, everybody wants a lover like that.
Everybody wants a lover, everybody wants a lover like that.
Everybody wants a lover, everybody wants a lover like that.)
(would you like me to seduce you? )
Youre such a, youre such a
(would you like me to seduce you? ) yeah! yeah!
(would you like me to seduce you? ) youre such a, youre such a.
Yeah! yeah!
(would you stop playing with that radio yorg, Im trying to get to sleep!)

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