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So I said to the gym instructor: 'Can you teach me to do the splits?' He said: 'How flexible are you?' I said: I can't make Tuesdays.'

quote by Tim Vine
Added by Lucian Velea
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Tuesdays Gone

Train roll on, on down the line
Wont you please take me far away
Now, I feel the wind blow outside my door
I leave my woman at home
Tuesdays gone with the wind
My babys gone with the wind
And I dont know oh where Im going
I just want to be left alone
When this train ends, Ill try again
I leave my woman at home
Tuesdays gone with the wind
Tuesdays gone with the wind
Tuesdays gone with the wind
My babys gone with the wind
Train roll on, tuesdays gone
Train roll on, many miles from my home
See, Im riding my blues away
Tuesday, you see, she had to be free
But somehow, Ive got to carry on
Tuesdays gone with the wind
Tuesdays gone with the wind
Tuesdays gone with the wind
My babys gone with the wind

song performed by Metallica
Added by Lucian Velea
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Adrienne Vittadini

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[...] Read more

poem by Caasder Fronds
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Tuesdays Children

Tuesdays children
Were falling short of time
Lets hope we never fall short of love
Memories linger like the fog on the sea
Keeping me out of touch with my reality
Nothing could ever mean as much to me
As tuesdays children
Sometimes I feel like Im falling short of myself
Who I am
What I choose to be
Most of the time tuesdays children
Brings it all back and down to me
These people
These friends of ours
Lets put them on another day
Just leave me tuesdays children
I can face the world my own way
Times like these make me wish
Everyday was a tuesday
Tuesdays children
Youve been so good to me
Tuesdays children

song performed by Indigo Girls
Added by Lucian Velea
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On Tuesdays

On Tuesdays Max visited
A dame a few blocks
Away with the mutt that
Seemed to bark all day.
He went because he liked
The way she made coffee
And always offered him
Toast or cake and because
She was blind and had the
Most useless mutt for the
Blind in the whole world.

On Tuesdays she opened
Her door to him; let him
In to her world and made
Him coffee and offered him
Toast or cake and listened as
He spoke and told her jokes
And related the latest gossip.

On Tuesdays he listened as
She spoke of her youth, of her
Days of being a beauty, of the
Day she lost her sight, how she
Coped in her world of darkness.

On Tuesdays he took her for a
Walk to a local restaurant and
They dined and ate and drank
And she listened to the people
Talking around her and to Max
Who recited a new poem he’d
Written or she just sat listening
To the traffic pass by wondering
If there were white puffy clouds
Above and what the colour the sky.

On Tuesdays Max walked her home
After lunch and they undressed and
Had sex and smoked and lay on the
Bed, he gazing at her beauty and she
Glad to be living and stroking his head.

poem by Terry Collett
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Tuesdays Gone

Train roll on, on down the line,
Wont you please take me far away?
Now I feel the wind blow outside my door,
Means Im leaving my woman behind.
Tuesdays gone with the wind.
My womans gone with the wind.
And I dont know where Im going.
I just want to be left alone.
Well, when this train ends Ill try again,
But Im leaving my woman at home.
(chorus)
Tuesdays gone with the wind.
Tuesdays gone with the wind.
Tuesdays gone with the wind.
My womans gone with the wind.
Train roll on many miles from my home,
See, Im riding my blues away.
Tuesday, you see, she had to be free
But somehow Ive got to carry on.
(chorus)

song performed by Lynyrd Skynyrd
Added by Lucian Velea
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Teach Me How to Eat

If you notice I stay hungry,
Teach me how to eat.
If you notice no baloney,
Teach me how to eat.

More discipline I may be needing.
Teach me how to eat.
More seriousness I may yet miss.
Teach me how to eat.

No medications do I take,
To keep a pace that irritates.
No longer young with dumb ideals.
Teach me how to eat.

I wish a peace that keeps me feeding.
So teach me how to eat.
I see in you more than in some.
The ones who can not overcome.
I see some stumble as others run.
But you,
Know how to eat.

Success you've reached and still you seek.
Teach me how to eat...
I'm hungry.
Teach me how to eat.

Success you've reached and still you seek.
Teach me how to eat...
I'm hungry.
Teach me how to eat.

If you notice I stay hungry,
Teach me how to eat.
If you notice no baloney,
Teach me how to eat.
I'm hungry.
Teach me how to eat.

Teach me how to eat.
I'm hungry.
Teach me how to eat.

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Knock It Up a Notch

Teach me...
How to knock it up a notch.
Teach me...
What it is that you've got!

Teach me.
I'm willing and able.
Teach me.
Don't you want my help,
To fulfill your need.

Teach me...
How to knock it up a notch.
Teach me...
What it is that you've got!
Will you teach me.
When you want that bop to stop.
Teach me...
And I promise you one day I'll want to 'eatcha'.

And there will be a need for slower speed,
When I begin to heat the teacher.

Um-um,
Mama teach me...
How to knock it up a notch.
Oh Mama teach me...
What it is that you've got!
Give me what it is until I like it more than not!

Teach me...
How to knock it up a notch.
Teach me...
What it is that you've got!
Will you teach me.
When you want that bop to stop.
Teach me...
And I'll promise you'll,
We'll switch up when you want me as your teacher.

We'll switch up when you want me as your teacher.
Switch up when you want me as your teacher.
We'll switch up when you want me as your teacher.
Switch up when you want me as your teacher.

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Ash Wednesday Once

Ash Wednesday. The dab of ash
On the forehead by the old priest.
The way his shaking thumb pushed
It there. Lent begun. What are you
Going to give up? Peggy asked him
Afterwards on the way from church.
I haven’t thought about it Henry replied.
You ought to she said. The feel of the
Priest’s thumb still itched his forehead.
And what to put in its place in case the
Devil creeps in she added giving him a
Sideward glance. He sensed her glance.
Last year I gave up the smokes he said.
For two days she said. It was a try he
Muttered. No point trying if you don’t
Have the will to succeed. He kept quiet.
There was that perfume of hers coming
To him on the wind. The perfume she
Wore that day they had sex in the school
Gym during the lunch hour before double
Science. He sniffed the air. It was still there.
The first time. The sound of others out
In the grounds. The mats and ropes and
Gym apparatus all around them. The gym
Mats were rough. I’ve given up chocolate
Peggy said suddenly pricking the balloon
Of his memory. I’m putting in an Ave in its
Place she added. Maybe I’ll give up on
Chocolate too Henry said. You hardly eat
Chocolate said she. I can hardly fail then
Henry put in. That misses the whole point.
She stared at him. And what would put in
Its place? He thought of the way she lay
There in the school gym. The perfume in
The air. Meditate on the seven deadly sins
He muttered putting his hand in hers.
She squeezed his hand. Flesh on flesh.
Give up the smokes she said. Put a Pater
Noster in its place. It was Ash Wednesday.
Sex in the gym. Back then. She and him.

poem by Terry Collett
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Teach The Gifted Children

Teach the gifted children
Teach them to have mercy
Teach them about sunsets
Teach them about moonrise
Teach them about anger
The sin that comes with dawning
Teach them about flowers
And the beauty of forgetfulness
Then take me to the river (take me to the river)
And put me in the water (and put me in the water)
Bless them and forgive them (take me to the river)
Father cause they just dont know (take me to the river)
All the gifted children
Teach the gifted children
The way of men and animals
Teach them about cities
The history of the mysteries
Their vice and their virtues
About branches that blow in the wind
On the wages of their sins
Teach them of forgiveness
Teach them about mercy
Teach them about music
And the cool and cleansing waters
What do they say, take me to the river (take me to the river)
Take me to the river (take me to the river)
Put me in the water (take me to the river)
And teach the gifted children (take me to the river)
All the gifted children (take me to the river)
(take me to the river)
(take me to the river)

song performed by Lou Reed
Added by Lucian Velea
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Teach Me How To Fly

It's never to late to open the gate.
'Teach me.
Teach me.'
Age is nothing but an excuse to make.
'Teach me to free myself.
Teach me like no one else.'

Moons come and those Summers go.
It's never too late to open the gate.
Minds in fear keep those dreams slowed.
Age aint nothing but an excuse to make.
'Teach me.
Teach me.
Teach me how to fly.'
It's never too late to open the gate.
'Teach me,
I'd like to try.'

You're the only one who decides it's too late.
You're the only one afraid to open the gate.
You're the one with urges wishing to escape.

'Why can't you reach me to teach me,
To break away from those limits made? '

You're the only one who decides it's too late.
You're the only one afraid to open the gate.
You're the one with urges wishing to escape.

'Teach me.
Teach me.
Teach me how to fly.'

I can't.
It was something I desired.
And with that desire...
I found it could be done.

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Teach Me Not Because

teach me not
of hatred.my heart
cries for love true and pure
teach, me not of wars
my mind had not come across
what is meant of prison cells
i do not wish to chase white doves
and put them in a cage
die of hunger
i want them to live peacefully
freely...dance with the wind
rest on white clouds
for they are the keeper of peace
not just on earth but also in heaven.
teach me not
of isolation and despair
i want to live among men
care for their plight
sing for them the songs of the lark
and their dreams be of a place
where sadness is but a dream
and not a stark reality..
teach me not to hate silence
for it is a virtue and a medium
to know better the beats from within
for i know that noisines drives
away the goodnesss of the heart
and the beauty of the soul..
teach me not to hate
teach me not of wars
teach me not of despair
teach me not of isolation
but..
teach me how to appreciate peace
teach me how to love
teach me how to care
teach me how to share
because i only wanted
to be an instrument of peace
of love
of care
of compassion
of serenity
because
i am
a man
a loving creature
of....
God

poem by Villiamor Calventas
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We Teach Them Young

We teach them young,
What to dislike.
And...
To separate into divisons,
With preferences selected.

We teach them young,
How to hate and who to fight.
With weapons used to kill.
And incite with mindless deeds.
We...
Teach them this!

We teach them,
With a rehabilitation done...
To respect laws when broken.
With the best of pretentions kept.
We...
Teach them this!

We teach them young,
The art of deception.
Self righteousness and hypocriscy.
And then when they reflect these lessons taught...
We teach them denial to have others believe.

We teach them young with a doing done they do!
And yet we get upset with regrets to protest those tests,
They have passed.
With accusations directed at others to blame,
For implimenting those tasks we teach.

We...
Teach them young!
With a doing of this not to admit.
As we wish for escape from their commitments,
Made.

We...
Teach them young.

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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The Opposite Begins

When one has had it,
With a havoc that misfits...
That one agitated,
Finds an exit and splits.

People known to create conflict,
Seek an attention they don't get...
Until,
The opposite begins.
Opposition steps in.

They pretend a trust to believe,
To have others perceive but...
The opposite begins,
For them.

Wake up and take notice,
That the opposite begins for them.
Those who charade innocence.
The opposite begins for them.
Those masking evil intent.
The opposite begins for them.

When one has had it,
With a havoc that misfits...
Well,
The opposite begins.
The opposite begins.
And...
That one agitated,
Finds an exit and splits.
But then,
The opposite begins.
The opposite begins.

That one who's had it,
Splits and runs into love...
To know the opposite begins,
When someone genuine comes in...
To view.

When one has had it,
With a havoc that misfits...
Well,
The opposite begins.
The opposite begins.
And...
That one who's had it,
Splits and runs into love...
To know the opposite begins,

[...] Read more

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Hoopitteedoo

Never give it up to anyone with a sucker punch.
With a pain that doubles you with troubles,
And you're taken out to lunch.

Never give it up to anyone with a sucker punch.
You may get duped,
With a looting too.

Some people hesitate with those they know fake.
Believing they are not the next to have a heartbreak.
Some people like the color of someone's eyes.
Not if they have dignity carried with pride.
Some people into things like to 'materialate'
About who has what and how that rates!

Never give it up to anyone with a sucker punch.
With a pain that doubles you with troubles,
And you're taken out to lunch.

Never give it up to anyone with a sucker punch.
You may get duped,
With a looting too.

Who's gonna hoop and holler in new gym shoes.
Who's gonna wear their jeans below the butt crack.
And...
Who's gonna hoop and holler in new gym shoes.
Who's gonna wear their jeans below the butt crack.

Some people hesitate with those they know fake.
Believing they are not the next to have a heartbreak.
Some people like the color of someone's eyes.
Not if they have dignity carried with pride.
Some people into things like to 'materialate'
About who has what and how that rates!

Never give it up to anyone with a sucker punch.
You may get duped,
With a looting too.

Who's gonna hoop and holler in new gym shoes.
Who's gonna be the one to 'hoopitteedoo'?
And...
Who's gonna wear their jeans below the butt crack.
Are they serious of having a lust and taste for that?
Ugh!
Who's gonna hoop and holler in new gym shoes.
Who's gonna be the one to 'hoopitteedoo'?
And...
Who's gonna wear their jeans below the butt crack.

[...] Read more

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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The Personal Trainer

husband
didn't pay attention when she started to change her look,
after all, she'd been saying how she wanted to for a while &
it seemed to make sense,
what with her going back to the gym full time,
after a period of time away
when they first had been married-
husband just went about his days
working more hours than he knew what to do with,
business was good &
with all the business around him seeming to fail,
he'd been putting away for the life he imagined in the future,
with or without
her-
but her time spent at the gym seemed to increase &
thought her body began to get trimmer, sexier, tighter, stronger &
she seemed to walk around the house with a new zest for life
(when he was there to see her) ,
he still didn't notice that
the personal trainer had moved in-
she had said something to him,
but he was listening less & less
as he had more & more to worry about at work,
for it was all part of building his empire.

the personal trainer was a less successful man
by the standard that money can by,
but he listened to her
as he traced her curves with his fingers in the gym
with palms of his hand smoothly gliding over her muscles
making her body quiver &
it wasn't long before in the car outside the gym
they consummated the professional relationship
again &
again &
again &
again.

as she began to show less interest in sex with her husband,
he wrote it off as a side-effect of marriage &
found himself a main squeeze on the side,
a 20 something who needed money to get her through college
with a perkiness that made him feel young again &
a body that wouldn't quit-
as he grew more distant from the wife,
she grew closer to the personal trainer,
until the day when she brought him home to the house,
when she swore the husband would be gone.

husband found out the way a husband will

[...] Read more

poem by Andrew Delapruch
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Gone Dead Train

Its a gone dead train
Yes, its a gone dead train
My engine was pumpin steam
And I was grindin at you hard and fast
Burnin down the rails, tryin to heat the way
Haulin ass and ridin up the track
And I laughed at the conductor who was tellin me my coal
It would never last
But then the fire in my boiler
Up and quit before I came
Aint no empty cellar
Like a gone dead train
Once was at a time when I could
Mama shave em dry
And raise a fever ice-down chill
Waitin at the station
With a heavy loaded sack
Savin up and holdin just to spill
Shootin my supply through my demons eye
Instead of holdin my time, I hope I will
But then the fire in my boiler
Up and quit before I came
There aint no empty cellar
Needs a gone dead train
Yes its a gone dead train
Im gonna teach it to learn now, now
Its a gone dead train
Yes its a gone dead train
Im gonna teach it to learn now, now
Its a gone dead train
Gonna teach it, gonna teach it to learn
There aint no easy day
When your daily runs a downhill pull
And there aint no easy way
Wishin for some jelly roll
There aint no switch been made
To make your juicy lemon find
A spring to run a dry well full
But then the fire in my boiler
Up and quit before I came
Aint no empty cellar
Needs a gone dead train
Yes its a gone dead train
Im gonna teach it to learn
You know its a gone dead train
Gonna teach it, gonna teach it to burn
Its a gone dead train
Its a gone dead train, you gotta learn
Its a gone dead train
Gonna teach it, gonna teach it, gonna teach it to burn.

[...] Read more

song performed by Nazareth
Added by Lucian Velea
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Hookey Rookie

You can teach me...
Like I never ever had been taught in time before.

Said you can teach me...
Like I never ever had been taught in time before.
'Cause before I met you, baby...
I played hookey!

You can teach me...
Like I never ever had been taught in time before.

Said you can teach me...
Like I never ever had been taught in time before.
'Cause before I met you, baby...
I played hookey!

I asked myself if that did...benefit?
What I did.
And who was with me.
Nothing that was done then was a fit.
No one would give.
And being played in the streets today...
Some say ain't easy!
I left it done and behind me, to forget.

You can teach me...
Like I never ever had been taught in time before.

Said you can teach me...
Like I never ever had been taught in time before.
'Cause before I met you, baby...
I played hookey!

Yes...
And you can teach me.
Like I never ever had been taught in time before.
Said you can teach me...
Like I never ever had been taught in time before.
'Cause before I met you, baby...
I played hookey!

Just for nookie.
I played hookey!
Just a rookie,
Gettin' nookie!
Missing you...
My Cookie!

You can teach me...
Like I never ever had been taught in time before.

[...] Read more

poem by Lawrence S. Pertillar
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Johnny Goes To War

At the age of eighteen
just after writing his final matriculation exam,
Johnny is called up to do military service
and when the pickup on the farm
have two flat tyres
and Johnny cannot get to the station in time,

he is fetched by three broad shouldered
military policemen who initially
want to arrest him
and shove him into a waiting military pickup van.

In the army he receives food
that gives him stomach flue
and for the first week
is almost stuck to the loo
and the mash potatoes
coming from a packet as powder,
runs into everything and has no salt in it

while the Colonel, the officers
and non-commissioned officers
have a feast in their mess,
having roasted beef and chicken
and eat as if they are truly blessed

and his hair is cut just above the scull,
he’s forced into an overall,
feels and looks like a criminal
while the instructors, the officers
and commanders wear normal uniforms

and he is chased up and down,
has to run to some trees
three kilometres far and back,
to bring a leave
and every time it’s not the right one

and the passing black citizens
at the railway tracks and on the road
shake their heads
and think that white men are nuts.

Day and night the instructor
slanders and curses at him,
he is put on duty
to guard armoured cars and trucks,
forced to run with poles and truck tyres
and to be just like his fellow military men,
even his girlfriend’s love letters,

[...] Read more

poem by Gert Strydom
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Along Came You

I thought that I knew all there was to know
I knew all about love
I lived the highs and made it through the lows
I knew all about love
But now I must admit Im surprised
And feel Ive only scratched the surface
cause baby when I look in your eyes
I understand my one true purpose
You were sent to me
By angels up above, Im certain
I thought Id show you what love can be
But what did I know
Until along came you
To teach me about love
Oh yes, along came you
To teach me about love
And as this feeling grows with every day
You awaken my heart
A heart so full I fear that it may break
If were ever apart
And though one day youll be own your own
You know I always will be near you
As near as on the day you were born
Call on me, you know Ill hear you
You were sent to me
For one reason, I can tell you
Youre here to show me what love can be
cause what did I know
Until along came you
To teach me about love
Oh yes, along came you
To teach me about love
Thula thula sana
U mama uyeza
Thula thula sana
Thula thula sana
U mama uyeza
You were sent to me
By angels up above, Im certain
Youre here to show me what love can be
cause what did I know
Until along came you
To teach me about love, oh
Oh yes, along came you
To teach me about love
Teach me about love
Oh yes, along came you
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby, baby
Teach me about love
Baby, baby teach me about love

[...] Read more

song performed by Gloria Estefan
Added by Lucian Velea
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Milkshake

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard
And they're like, it's better than yours
Damn right it's better than yours
I could teach you
But I have to charge
My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard
And they're like, it's better than yours
Damn right it's better than yours
I could teach you
But I have to charge
I know you want it
The thing that makes me
What the guys go crazy for
They lose their minds
The way I whine
I think it's time
La,La,La,La,La
Warm it up
La,La,La,La,La
The boys are waiting
La,la,La,La,La
Warm it up
La,La,La,La,La
The boys are waiting
My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard
And they're like, it's better than yours
Damn right it's better than yours
I could teach you but I have to charge
My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard
And they're like, it's better than yours
Damn right it's better than yours
I could teach you but I have to charge
I see you're on it
You want me to teach thee
Techniques that freaks these boys
It can't be bought
Just the thieves get caught
Watch if you're smart
La,La,La,La,La
Warm it up
La,La,La,La,La
The boys are waiting
La,La,La,La,La,
Warm it up
La,La,La,La,La
The boys are waiting
My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard
And they're like, it's better than yours
Damn right it's better than yours
I could teach you but I have to charge

[...] Read more

song performed by Kelis
Added by Lucian Velea
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