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Over-Heard Conversations at the Party

'I'm not really fat' he said
'I am anorexic,
just not very good at it.'

'I can't keep a girl friend
I am too, uh, big down there
they say it hurts.'
'You expect me to believe this line? '

'I didn't say I loved you
I said I often think of you.
That's what I said.'

'I have to give up drugs
I am hallucinating
the girl of my dreams.'

So I told her it was ok
she could sleep with him
but she would have to pay
for that pair of shoes
we saw at Nordstrum's.'

'So my Dad says
'All I am asking for
is a Some Sex Marriage.'

So he says he is not gay
he just likes men.

I thew up on him
and he was so sweet
he wiped it off
and I tipped him a dollar.

And then I found out
that the tattoo
he put on my butt
was his ex-girl friend.

Girl, he is ugly
-no way around the facts-
unless you saying
he is packing.

She stood there
and let all the men
get a good look
at her cleavage.
How can you compete
with that?

I don't really read books
and stuff like that
takes too long.

I told him he never
listens to me
and he said
'What? '

I don't know,
the honeymoon
was a disaster;
we made love
for only about five hours
and he started complaining
about his back.

What's your name again?

'You got a girlfriend? '
'Yes' she said.

So he heard us making love
on the answering machine-
the thing was on room monitor.

I told him the baby was his.

Couldn't sleep at all last night-
Vibrator ran out of batteries.

So he said
'You are bleeding.
Is that normal?
'Normal' I said
Bleeding?
And then I passed out.

Well he is very tall,
got big feet,
a big nose.
and bedroom eyes
All the things I need right now.

I had to set him free.
Hard to be with a man
prettier than you.

I hate these parties
and the food is bad.
Don't know why I come.

'I do love you
its just that I don't want
you to think that means
we will get married.'

'The last thing in the world I
need right now is for someone
to fall in love with me and
find out that I was not worth
falling in love with.'

'It was easy. I told him
he was superman man in my eyes.
And then a year later I said
if you are superman
why haven't you solved all of my problems.?
He had no answer.
And then I said
'You are a superman fraud'

poem by Lonnie Hicks
Added by Poetry Lover
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