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Big Fat Woman

You big fat woman get your fat leg off of me
You big fat woman get your fat leg off of me
You feel so good
Scare the hell out of me
You got a great big leg
Got a whoppin' thigh
Great big leg
Got a whoppin' thigh
Now oooh
You got a great big leg
Got a whoppin' thigh
And every time you move make my temperature rise
That fine lookin' woman got a great big leg
Fine lookin' woman got a great big leg, Yeah
Big fat woman with a great big leg
Big fat woman got a great big leg
And every time she moves
Moves like a soft boiled egg
So big fat woman get your fat leg off of me
Now you obese woman get your fat leg off of me

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song performed by Jim Croce
Added by Lucian Velea
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Get A Leg Up

Dont look at me dont touch me
Keep your mind straight ahead
Dont get no funny ideas about we
Or youll wish you were dead
Thats what I am thinking she must be thinking
The girl I spent 53 bucks on last night
She give me a look from the corner of her eye
That says, boy, keep acting right
How surprised was i
When she leaned over and whispered in my ear
Chorus:
Get a leg up
Get a leg over boy
Get a leg up
Whats the matter
Are you shy, shy, shy?
Im pretty good with first impressions
But sometimes im not always right
I pulled the car to the shoulder of the road
To see what she had in mind

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song performed by John Mellencamp
Added by Lucian Velea
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The bow-leg boy

Who should come up the road one day
But the doctor-man in his two-wheel shay!
And he whoaed his horse and he cried "Ahoy!
I have brought you folks a bow-leg boy!
Such a cute little boy!
Such a funny little boy!
Such a dear little bow-leg boy!"

He took out his box and he opened it wide,
And there was the bow-leg boy inside!
And when they saw that cunning little mite,
They cried in a chorus expressive of delight:
"What a cute little boy!
What a funny little boy!
What a dear little bow-leg boy!"

Observing a strict geometrical law,
They cut out his panties with a circular saw;
Which gave such a stress to his oval stride
That the people he met invariably cried:

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poem by Eugene Field
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Shake A Leg

Idle juvenile on the street, on the street
Who is kicking everything with his feet, with his feet
Fighting on the wrong side of the law, of the law
Dont kick, dont fight, dont sleep at night
Its shake a leg, shake a leg, shake a leg, shake it yeah
Keeping out of trouble with eyes in the back of my face
Kicking ass in the class and they tell me youre a damn disgrace
They tell me what they think but they stink and I really dont care
Got a mind of my own, move on, get out of my hair
Chorus:
Shake a leg, shake your head
Shake a leg, wake the dead
Shake a leg, get stuck in
Shake a leg, shake a leg yeah
Magazines, wet dreams, dirty women on machines for me
Big licks, skin flicks, trickey dicks are my chemistry
Goin against the grain, trying to keep me sane with you
So stop your grinnin and drop your linen for me
Chorus
Idle juvenile on the street, on the street

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song performed by AC-DC
Added by Lucian Velea
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World, Wise head & Football

World on leg, world by leg, world in leg not hand

Shooting, moving, going

From to from, from to from, from to from

World on head, world by head, world in head not hand

Only two-operator touch world by their all

Heading, shooting or kicking moving, going from to from

We feel exciting with love or loveless

We total world exclaim goal, goal and goal

I believe immensely

Football is world

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poem by Mashiur Rahman
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3 Legs

Well when I walk, when I walk
On my horse upon the hill (when I walk the horse upon a hill)
Well when I walk, walk walk walk
On my horse upon the hill (when I walk the horse upon a hill)
And I lay me down
Will my lover love me still
A dog is here, (a dog is here), a dog is there (a dog is there)
My dog he got three leg
But he cant run
Well when I thought, well I thought
When I thought you was my friend (when I thought I could call you my friend)
When I thought, when I thought
When I thought you was my friend (when I thought I could call you my friend)
But you laid me down, put my heart around the bend
A fly flies in (a fly flies in), a fly flies out (a fly flies out)
Most flies they got three leg, but mine got one.
Well when I fly when I fly when I fly,when I fly above the cloud
(when I fly above the man in the crowd)
Well when I fly when I fly when I fly,when I fly above the crowd
(when I fly above the man in the crowd)

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song performed by Paul McCartney
Added by Lucian Velea
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Three-Legged Man

Well now friends you'll never guess it so I really must confess it
I just met the sweetest woman of my long dismal life.
But a friend of mine said, 'Buddy, just in case your mind is muddy,
Don't you know that girl you're fooling with is Peg-Leg Johnson's wife.
And that man is big and rough and mean and grim,
And he'll brain you with his artificial limb.
But next morning bright and early I stole old Peg-Leg's girlie,
And I also took his wooden leg just to play it safe.
But there weren't no time for laughter 'cause he started hopping after,
And I keep on running faster but he won't give up the chase.
And I'm running through the mountain with his bride,
And I got his wooden leg here by my side.
I'm a three-legged man with a two-legged woman
Being chased cross country by a one-legged fool.
Though he's huffing and he's puffing and he shows no sign of stopping,
I tell you, boys, this life is hard and cruel.
'Cross the deserts and the valleys and the dark Chicago alleys
'Cross the mighty Mississippi to the hills of Caroline.
Through the mountains of Montana and the swamps of Louisiana
Everytime that I look back he's JUST one foot behind.

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poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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One Leg Anne and the Kid

Anne poked Monica
the girl with burn scars
with one of her crutches

and said
Scam scar face
me and the skinny kid

want to be alone
and Monica moved off
and said

I'm going to tell
Sister Bridget about you
Anne indicated for you

to sit in one of the chairs
on the lawn
and said to Monica

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poem by Terry Collett
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The Hunters

Six men went hunting, but only four returned.
Two, in fact, hadn't returned.
Oknov, Kozlov, Stryuchkov and Motylkov returned home safely, but Shirokov and Kablukov perished on the hunt.
OKNOV went around very upset the whole day and wouldn't even talk to anyone. Kozlov walked round behind Oknov with great persistence, badgering him with all manner of questions, by which means he drove Oknov to a point of extreme irritation.
KOZLOV: Do you fancy a smoke?
OKNOV: No!
KOZLOV: Do you want me to bring you that thing over there?
OKNOV: No!
KOZLOV: Perhaps you'd like me to tell you a funny story?
OKNOV: No!
KOZLOV: Well, do you want a drink? I've got some tea and cognac here.
OKNOV: Not content with just having smashed you over the skull with this stone, I'll rip your leg off as well.
STRYUCHKOV AND MOTYLKOV: What are you doing? What are you doing?
KOZLOV: Pick me up from the ground.
MOTYLKOV: Don't you get excited now, that wound will heal.
KOZLOV: And where's Oknov?
OKNOV (Ripping off Kozlov's leg): I'm right here.
KOZLOV: Oh, my gosh golly!
STRYUCHKOV AND MOTYLKOV: Seems he's ripped the leg off him as well!
OKNOV: Ripped it off and thrown it over there!

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poem by Daniil Ivanovich Kharms
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Leg

I know your legs are
On the legs of Baali the demon king
I know your legs are
On the head of Bharata your brother
I know your legs are on the
Head of Uddhaba your follower.

You have no leg I heard.
I Know you are present everywhere
Everytime and in everybody.

I do not know what a leg is.
I know the insect has six legs
I know the animal has four legs
I know the bird has two legs.

Your leg is my project paper
I do not know howmany legs you have
I do not know I a leg is.

poem by Gajanan Mishra
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