Far too much in love I was with her (sonnet corona / crown of sonnets)
(for A)
I
Far too much in love I was with her
but probably she did not really love me,
while she became involved with another,
and I became her liability.
Crying I could hardly see
and although the parting was shattering
from her fighting rages I was finally free
and being alone at times was overwhelming
the parting is much better still
as she tried to stain my integrity
and at times did not have goodwill,
tried to hide from any responsibility,
destiny knew better about the things that ought to be,
my love, like an illness almost destroyed me.
II
My love, like an illness almost destroyed me
and on the balcony of the fifteenth floor
I was robbed from sense and sensibility
wavering to jump and land in a bundle of gore
but something spoke to my heart spoke to my soul
and I knew that all fair reasoning had left me
turned me into a animal, somewhat like a ghoul
and immediately I saw this as inadequacy
dealing with the situation of love lost
and step away from the beyond
spared myself the ultimate cost
of going on in death's bond:
seeing that you like a devil besieged me,
I stepped away and from you I was free.
III
I stepped away and from you I was free,
but I still wonder how you could take
gifts, flowers and poems from me
and in my back could at times rake
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poem by Gert Strydom
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