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Not only do I sing to him, I sing entire conversations. You become Jerry Lewis.

quote by Paul Reiser
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Lewis

Bummed out again
Buy early business friend
The smell of fear is bigger than you think
Hey don't do it
Do it
Change seem to fit
In the end you just feel sick
And then you choke on an anesthetic
Hey don't do it
Lewis
Lewis
Save yourself the pain
You'll never get there
Lewis
Save yourself the pain
It never really matters here
We never noticed
We never understood
He just get crushed to fit
He never even smile
At the best, it's the best,
It's the best day i know
Lewis
Save yourself the pain
You'll never get there
Lewis
Save yourself the pain
It never really matters here
Lewis
Mistreated
I call you blue
Lewis
Mistreated
I call you blue
I don't wanna talk about it
I don't wanna talk about it
I don't wanna talk about lewis! lewis! lewis!
I don't wanna talk about it
Lewis! lewis! lewis!

song performed by Radiohead
Added by Lucian Velea
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High Price

Jerry Jerry your lifestyles hairy
how do your dope plants grow?
In cramped ceiling, under a naked bulb, my lady,
from little seeds all in a row.

Jerry Jerry your rather smelly
how are your dope plants sold?
By bountiful bagful, or in single rolls, to tally
Waitangi gold, is a trip, for joint discerning bold.

Jerry Jerry do you live in fear
do you feel hunted, with pouncing, policemen near?
The boys in blue, dance a merry, merry tune.
What’s a bust, may come yearly, like June?

Jerry Jerry one day all grow old
will you feel regret, for lives, you’ve sold?
I’ve been living high, flying in narcotic, sky seat.
Life’s been so very sweet, living with prepaid, heat.

Jerry Jerry a future comes, your days done,
there’s no place for you, under our sun?
There’s always a place, man in selective, supplying know.
There’re other trips, after poppy seeds, to sow.

Jerry Jerry it’s time now, you must go
tell of other pastures, you now will hoe?
Man’s full of lust, greed, ever fertile seed,
a high paying price, is charge for need.

No matter where man chance may roam.
A place is found, I’m right at home.

poem by Terence George Craddock
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Sing Along To The Song Of The Sea

Sing along, sing along to the song of the sea
In the wash of white, wild weather’s wave,
As it gushes galore
Onto strand’s silver shore,
Like a ghost from a galleon’s grave.

Sing along, sing along to the song of the sea
In the shout of coarse cannon’s rough roar
That rang round Britain’s bays
In Drake’s drum’s finest days,
When England and Spain went to war.

Sing along, sing along to the song of the sea
In the piping aboard of massed men,
As brave sailors set sail,
Swearing never to fail
If England is threatened again.

Sing along, sing along to the song of the sea
In the murmur of muttering crew
Who sent cruel Captain Bligh
All adrift ’neath the sky,
As the Bounty retreated from view.

Sing along, sing along to the song of the sea
In the hovering hum of the heat
In the eye that is formed
In a tropical storm
As it seems to have paused for a sleep.

Sing along, sing along to the song of the sea
In the pitter and patter of rain,
Which refuses to stop
Until every last drop
Is returned with its might to the main.

Sing along, sing along to the song of the sea
In the thrash of the threatening tide,
As it rushes, so rough,
In great gales from the gulf,
Fetching flotsam along for the ride.

Sing along, sing along to the song of the sea
In the moan of a shuddering mast,
As it bends in the gale,
Which hopes it will fail
In the force of its battering blast.

Sing along, sing along to the song of the sea
In the clap of loud thunder’s harsh crack,

[...] Read more

poem by C. Richard Miles
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Timber Ho!

Im gonna pull this timber 'fore the sun go down
Get it 'cross the river 'fore the bars come down
Drag it on down that dusty road
Come on jerry, lets dump this load
I said timber, ho!, timber, woah this timbers gotta roll
I said timber, ho!, timber, woah this timbers gotta roll
My old jerry was an arkansas mule
Been everywhere and he aint no fool
Weighed nine hundred and twenty-two
Done everything a poor mule can do
(chorus)
Jerrys shoulders stood six foot tall
Pulled more timber than a freight could haul
Workin heavy old jerry got sore
Pulled so much he couldnt pull no more
(chorus)
The boss said jerry and it made him jump
Jerry ran and kicked the boss on the rump
My old jerry was a cool mule
Had it been me I woulda killed that fool
Boss tried to shoot old jerry in the head
Jerry took that bullet and he stomped him dead
Stomped that boss til he heard him scream
Sure dont care he was so damn mean
(chorus 2x)

song performed by Phish
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Demonstrate (Admiral Jerry)

Well Jerry at de mike come fe Demonstrate
Yes, Jerry at de mike me come fe Demonstrate
Me come fe show de crowd a people dat great is great
Right ya now Mr Jerry at go set tings straight
No MC test Jerry in a ATE
So listen dem ya styles I man originate
First of all me wan you know me na exaggerate
All pirate in de dance me would a evacuate
Is a whole leap a space I man accomodate
An a whole leap a gal I accumulate
Round de mile Jerry don't need no associate
Me chat by meself me no combinate
Me study very hard because me want graduate
Up de MC ladder I man Essulate
To be a boss MC I'm a chief candidate
True me fascinate nor irritate and me originate
Round de classic Micro-centre dat is where me locate
Me no select no tune an Jerry don't operate
Fe see me lift speaker - box you must fortunate
Cause asdedance down me gone home me gone go hibernate
Going home de other night me can't remember de date
De early hours of de morning before people a wake
Bopsing down de road it was me worst mistake
Police come draw down pon me an a investigate
Him say "Hey son where you coming from don't you know that it's late
I've heard about you niggers and the trouble you create"
I said "I'm coming from a party and me going home straight
Me just stop a de shop to buy some cigarette an chocolate"
When me explain de situation him stop interrogate
Turn around jump in a im panda car an say "See you mate!"
Is a good ting me never cheeky or be obstinate
Or me could a end up visiting de damn magistrate
De house way me live in you know it must decorate
An de girl way me love ave to affectionate
Nem ya linda lyrics you must penetrate
So listen every word I man and quotate
True me talking very clear you no need fe translate
Cause when me riding pon de riddim me no mek no mistake
Gasst contagious disease I man vaccinate
An true me no wan catch a dose me no fornicate
De lyrics way me chat dem must varinte
Some time me chat itslow sometime me accelerate
Dem ya kinds style you must appreciate
Nuff gal come to me a congratulate
Dem say "Jerry your so good looking can I have you portrait"
I say "Yes of course my darling but you know you have to wait"
Well dais a something I man have to state
A trollop is a woman with a whole heap a weight
Don't tell her to her face cause she will aggrovate
And if she sit down pon you you will suffocate

[...] Read more

song performed by Ub40
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Carrolling - Parody Lewis CARROLL – The Mad Gardener’s Song

He thought he saw an Internet
exchanging peer to peer,
he looked again and hedged his bet, -
by middle of next year
new routing tables tuned as yet
unknown may well appear –
on track to trace attack and get
convictions based on fear.

He dreamt that spam would disappear,
all trash deleted fast.
He dreamt that Windows would be clear
of viral bugs’ wormcast.
He woke to find world insincere
where independence past
was sacrificed throughout the year
to biometrics ghast.

He thought he saw a friend’s hello
with an attachment piece,
he opened to discover, though,
a trojan horse release –
He looked again as data flow
declined, - mind not at peace -
and whispered with voice timbre low:
‘I’ll send for the Police! ”

He thought he saw a heirophant
predicting happy life.
He looked again, with rage and rant
discovered from ex-wife
an email angry claiming scant
support, which threatened strife:
“At length I see the immanent
attraction of Time’s knife! ”

He dreamt he saw as he awake
the euro reach a peak,
he saw he dreamt that Bush half bake
would leave the dollar weak: -
he woke to find what grave mistake
was made for the next week
the politicians put a stake
in budget – rocked boats leak!

He thought he saw Commission clerk
jump on bandwagon bus,
he looked again, just for a lark,
and found no tinker’s cuss
the former cared for bite was bark -

[...] Read more

poem by Jonathan Robin
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Carrolling II-Parody Lewis CARROLL–The Mad Gardener’s Song

Carolling II

He Thought He Saw

He thought he saw new Internet
exchanging peer to peer,
he looked again and found it was
a mirage for each year
sees more control, “what rôle, ” he said,
“for values once held dear?
Some track to trace attack and get
convictions based on fear.'

He dreamt he saw spam disappear,
all consultations free,
he looked again and found it was
a spybot lottery.
“Is net neutrality”, he said,
“from rash risks viral clear? ”

He dreamt that Microsoft would steer
all trash deleted fast,
then woke to find world insincere
where independence past
was sacrificed throughout the year
to biometrics ghast.

He thought he saw a friend’s hello,
with an attachment piece,
he looked again and found it was
the porno scanning police.
“Politically correct”, he said,
“can’t guarantee release.”

He opened it, discovered though,
a trojan horse to fleece –
he looked again as data flow
declined, - mind not at peace -
and whispered with voice hoarse and low:
'when will our worries cease? ”

He thought he saw a hierophant,
who’d deal successful life,
he looked again and found it was
subpoena from ex-wife
demanding child support, he said,
“cards are cut by Time’s knife.”

He looked once more with rage and rant
and swore like a fishwife

[...] Read more

poem by Jonathan Robin
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She Thought She Saw-Parody Lewis CARROLL–The Mad Gardener’s Song

She Thought She Saw

She thought she saw quite equal pay
afforded equal work,
she looked again and found it was
a most unusual quirk.
“That men should keep their cake, ” she said,
“and eat it too, must irk.”

She thought she saw that light of day
would filter through each jerk,
she looked again and found it was
belief most held beserk.
“That men should nappies change, ” she said,
“would wipe off every smirk! ”

She thought she saw fair interplay
where men would never shirk,
she looked again and found it was
a most miasmic murk
where rights were flouted, - “Hey! ” she said,
“men stand, wait, feeble lurk! ”

(15 April 2007 Parody Lewis CARROLL Some Hallucinations
The Mad Gardener's Dream Sylvie and Bruno Ch.5 See below Carolling and Carolling II)

Carolling

He thought he saw an Internet
exchanging peer to peer,
he looked again and hedged his bet, -
by middle of next year
new routing tables tuned as yet
unknown may well appear –
on track to trace attack and get
convictions based on fear.

He dreamt that spam would disappear,
all trash deleted fast.
He dreamt that Windows would be clear
of viral bugs’ wormcast.
He woke to find world insincere
where independence past
was sacrificed throughout the year
to biometrics ghast.

He thought he saw a friend’s hello
with an attachment piece,

[...] Read more

poem by Jonathan Robin
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Jerry Springer

Its been one week since we got to see
Cheatin lovers and cousins that marry
Five days since they had the show
With the hermaphrodite, the slut, and the crack ho
Three days since we heard the tale
About the guy who learned his woman was a she-male
Yesterday it occurred to me
That Ive been watchin a bit too much jerry springer
Holy cow, dyou see it last week?
Well, they had this one freak
Who sucker-punched his whole family
Do you recall when the brawl
Became a total free-for-all
And jerrys in the middle tryin to be the referee
Hey, see the stripper with the implants
She likes to lap dance
And date the boyfriend of her mother
Now here comes jerrys next guest
And its a slugfest
cause its her trailer trash brother
Nymphomaniac is back on crack
Its like when animals attack
They all exhibit reprehensible behavior
Hit em in the nose, tear off their clothes
Step on their toes, thats how it goes
They get so violent they have to sign a waiver
Theyre always swearin, cursin, kickin butt, and pointin blame
On the air? they dont care, theyve got no shame
There was one guy who Im sure felt a little strange
When he found out that his wife had a sex change
They have a tendency to scream and yell constantly
They have a history of ripping off their shirts
Its been one week since they had the fight
With the siamese twins and the transvestite
Five days since that awful brawl
They still havent got the blood off the wall
Its been three days since the bitter fued
Between the kkk and that gay jewish black dude
Yesterday, finally dawned on me
Im spendin way too much time on that jerry springer
Guy guest : baby, Ive been sleepin with your sister
Gal guest : oh? well, which one?
Guy guest : all of them
Gal guest : oh! well, Ive been sleepin with your best friend jake!
Guy guest : yah? well, well me too!
Gal guest : oh!
Guy guest : and Ive sleepin with your dog woofie!
(barking)
Gal guest : woofie, you b-tch!
Gal guest : well, Im also sleepin with your pet goat!

[...] Read more

song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
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An Ode - In Imitation of Horace, Book III. Ode II.

How long, deluded Albion, wilt thou lie
In the lethargic sleep, the sad repose
By which thy close thy constant enemy
Has softly lull'd thee to thy woes?
Or wake, degenerate isle, or cease to own
What thy old kings in Gallic camps have done,
The spoils they brought thee back, the crowns they won,
William (so Fate requires) again is arm'd,
Thy father to the field is gone,
Again Maria weeps her absent lord,
For thy repose content to rule alone.
Are thy enervate sons not yet alarm'd?
When William fights dare they look tamely on,
So slow to get their ancient fame restored,
As not to melt at Beauty's tears nor follow Valour's sword?

See the repenting isle awakes,
Her vicious chains the generous goddess breaks;
The fogs around her temples are dispell'd;
Abroad she looks, and sees arm'd Belgia stand
Prepared to meet heir common lord's command,
Her lions roaring by her side, her arrows in her hand,
And blushing to have been so long withheld,
Weeps off her crime, and hastens to the field:
Henceforth her youth shall be inured to bear
Hazardous toil and active war:
To march beneath the dogstar's raging heat,
Patient of summer's drought and martial sweat,
And only grieve in winter's camp to find
Its days too short for labours they design'd:
All night beneath hard heavy arms to watch,
All day to mount the trench, to storm the breach,
And all the rugged paths to tread
Where William and his virtue led.

Silence is the soul of war;
Deliberate counsel must prepare
The mighty work which valour must complete:
Thus William rescued, thus preserves the state,
Thus teaches us to think and dare:
As, whilst his cannon just prepared to breathe
Avenging anger and swift death,
In the tried metal the close dangers glow,
And now, too late, the dying foe
Perceives the flame, yet cannot ward the blow;
So whilst in William's breast ripe counsels lie,
Secret and sure as brooding Fate,
No more of his design appears
Than what awakens Gallia's fears,
And (though Guilt's eye can sharply penetrate)

[...] Read more

poem by Matthew Prior
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And then there were none

There were ten
Waiting by the road
Ready for a journey
Of an entire lifetime

The ten crossed the lake,
But the tenth was too scared
He left the others to their fates
And departed with some joy.

And then there were nine
Walking by the road,
Engrossed in the journey
Of an entire lifetime

The nine walked over a bridge
But the ninth saw a beauty
Pursued her, leaving the rest
And sealed his own fate

And then there were eight
Walking by the road,
Engrossed in the journey
Of an entire lifetime.

As they walked by the gorge,
The eighth saw a tree
Laden with fruits. Hunger
Consumed his life away

And then there were seven
Walking by the road,
Engrossed in the journey
Of an entire lifetime.

As they walked by the mountain
Cold consumed their hearts.
The seventh saw a route
To escape from the way.

And then there were six
Walking by the road,
Engrossed in the journey
Of an entire lifetime.

The trail went on and on
Never showed a sign of ending
The sixth lost all hope
And left the party, disgruntled.

[...] Read more

poem by Devdan Vaidyanathan
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Envoy--To Charles Baxter

Do you remember
That afternoon--that Sunday afternoon! -
When, as the kirks were ringing in,
And the grey city teemed
With Sabbath feelings and aspects,
LEWIS--our LEWIS then,
Now the whole world's--and you,
Young, yet in shape most like an elder, came,
Laden with BALZACS
(Big, yellow books, quite impudently French),
The first of many times
To that transformed back-kitchen where I lay
So long, so many centuries -
Or years is it!--ago?

Dear CHARLES, since then
We have been friends, LEWIS and you and I,
(How good it sounds, 'LEWIS and you and I!'):
Such friends, I like to think,
That in us three, LEWIS and me and you,
Is something of that gallant dream
Which old DUMAS--the generous, the humane,
The seven-and-seventy times to be forgiven! -
Dreamed for a blessing to the race,
The immortal Musketeers.

Our ATHOS rests--the wise, the kind,
The liberal and august, his fault atoned,
Rests in the crowded yard
There at the west of Princes Street. We three -
You, I, and LEWIS!--still afoot,
Are still together, and our lives,
In chime so long, may keep
(God bless the thought!)
Unjangled till the end.

poem by William Ernest Henley
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Sing You Children

(words & music by nelson - burch)
Oh jonah he was desperate in the belly of the whale
Well jonah had a plan, he knew he couldnt fail
He raised his head on high
And looking for the sky
And he sang his song so pretty
The whale told him goodbye
You got to sing you children sing
Sing you children sing
I only know one thing, hey! hey! hey!
Sing you children sing, everybody
Sing you children sing
Sing your troubles away
Well moses said good lord
Open up these waters for me
So I can get your chidren
Across the salty sea
Well the lord parted the waters
And singing hand in hand
Moses and the children
Walked over to the promised land
You got to sing you children sing
Sing you children sing
I only know one thing, hey! hey! hey!
Sing you children sing, everybody
Sing you children sing
Sing your troubles away
Oh joshua had a plan
At the walls of jericho
Hed march around those walls
And on his horn hed blow
That horn would play a tune
And sing a happy song
When joshua got through
Those walls came tumbling down
You got to sing you children sing
Sing you children sing
I only know one thing, hey! hey! hey!
Sing you children sing, everybody
Sing you children sing
Sing your troubles away
You got to sing your troubles away
Sing your troubles away
Sing your troubles away
Sing your troubles away
Sing your troubles away

song performed by Elvis Presley
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I've Got The Melody (Deep In My Heart)

You've got the music in your heart,
I know just how to make it start.
You know the song that makes me sing,
You know the tune, so play my strings.
'Cause I've got the melody deep in my heart,
I could sing it alone, but I'd rather not.
You've got the harmony deep in your soul,
If we sing it together, our love will hold.
It sounds just like a symphony,
Something composed by you and me.
I hear the music that we make,
The sound of love is what it takes.
To coax out a melody straight from our hearts,
Let us sing it together, don't ever stop.
Let's add the harmony straight from our souls,
'Cause if we sing together now,
We sing together now,
We sing, we sing.
(Instrumental)
You've got the music in your heart,
I know just how to make it start.
You know the song that makes me sing,
You know the tune, so play, play, play.
I've got the melody deep in my heart,
I could sing it alone, but I'd rather not.
You've got the harmony deep in your soul,
If we sing it together, our love will hold.
Sing it together and love will hold.
Let's sing the melody straight from our hearts,
Let us sing it together, don't never, ever stop.
Let's add the harmony straight from our souls,
'Cause if we sing together,
We sing together,
We sing, we sing.
(Instrumental)
I've got the melody deep in my heart,
I could sing it alone, but I'd rather not.
You've got the harmony deep in your soul,
If we sing it together, our love will hold.
Let's sing the melody straight from our hearts,
Let us sing it together, don't never, never, never stop.
Let's add the harmony straight from our souls,
'Cause if we sing together, our love will hold.
Let's sing the melody, let's sing the melody,
Let us sing it, come on sing it,
Don't never, never, never stop.
Let's add the harmony, let's add the harmony,
'Cause if we sing together, our love will hold.
Let's sing the melody straight, let's sing the melody,
Let, let's sing it, let us sing it,

[...] Read more

song performed by Kenny Loggins
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I've Got The Melody

You've got the music in your heart,
I know just how to make it start.
You know the song that makes me sing,
You know the tune, so play my strings.
'cause i've got the melody deep in my heart,
I could sing it alone, but i'd rather not.
You've got the harmony deep in your soul,
If we sing it together, our love will hold.
It sounds just like a symphony,
Something composed by you and me.
I hear the music that we make,
The sound of love is what it takes.
To coax out a melody straight from our hearts,
Let us sing it together, don't ever stop.
Let's add the harmony straight from our souls,
'cause if we sing together now,
We sing together now,
We sing, we sing.
(instrumental)
You've got the music in your heart,
I know just how to make it start.
You know the song that makes me sing,
You know the tune, so play, play, play.
I've got the melody deep in my heart,
I could sing it alone, but i'd rather not.
You've got the harmony deep in your soul,
If we sing it together, our love will hold.
Sing it together and love will hold.
Let's sing the melody straight from our hearts,
Let us sing it together, don't never, ever stop.
Let's add the harmony straight from our souls,
'cause if we sing together,
We sing together,
We sing, we sing.
(instrumental)
I've got the melody deep in my heart,
I could sing it alone, but i'd rather not.
You've got the harmony deep in your soul,
If we sing it together, our love will hold.
Let's sing the melody straight from our hearts,
Let us sing it together, don't never, never, never stop.
Let's add the harmony straight from our souls,
'cause if we sing together, our love will hold.
Let's sing the melody, let's sing the melody,
Let us sing it, come on sing it,
Don't never, never, never stop.
Let's add the harmony, let's add the harmony,
'cause if we sing together, our love will hold.
Let's sing the melody straight, let's sing the melody,
Let, let's sing it, let us sing it,

[...] Read more

song performed by Kenny Loggins
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An Ancient Song - Parody after Tolkien and Summer Is Icumen In

Saruman's a'coming in
Sauron sing cuccu!
Spurneth seed, and soweth weed,
Filth-felleth the woode nu -
where once Ent women grew -
Sore_Wrong Ring cuckoo...

Thou bleedest after wham!
Truth after halfmast cows;
Bollock starteth, lucke farteth,
Breaketh Ent Tree boughs
‘Fore Treebeard's entry bows.
Merry sing cuckoo!

Trolls and goblins on patrol
seek for precious swallowed whole
while Shelob spider vile to vial
of light takes fright in secret lair
with orcses everywhere.
Mount Doom venteth, desolation shivers soul.

Though wizard voice charms choice it harms,
white hand darker groweth,
palantir pays traitors dear
fate's forfeiture it oweth,
Isengard though guarded, drowned
elves emigrate, all goeth.

Werewolves out to battle ride
so kings and queens are loth to hide
for Middle Earth man giant fighteth
though dark dragons plummet fast
wraith team win, redeem sin past,
fell fortress falls, dawn lighteth.

Cuckoo, cuckoo, well Worlde seems cuckoo:
He strike thu ever nu;
nor knew ye what to do
when forests walked on cue.
Wring Gollum's gold Ring cuckoo,
Sing Frodo, sing Bilbo too!

Second version
Saruman's a'coming in
Sauron sing cuccu!
Spurneth seed, and soweth weed,
Filth-felleth the woode nu -
where once Ent women grew -
Sore_Wrong Ring cuckoo...

[...] Read more

poem by Jonathan Robin
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Kill Jerry Garcia

Im not gonna choke on your hard sell media dope
Im not going out like that
I dont want to hear about the summer of love
Im not going back in time
I dont want to even let love rule
I want to break the back of brotherly love
I dont want to go back in time
I wanna kill jerry garcia!
I wanna take the past and throw it away
I want to burn the bridge between then and now
Im not going back in time
I wanna kill jerry garcia!
I dont want to sew the seeds of love
I want to punch marty balin in his eye
I dont wanna go back in time
I wanna kill jerry garcia!
(man, I dont have a quarter, leave me alone)
Dont want no dead blood on my hands
I wanna shake the flesh and bone
I dont wanna kill the myth
I wanna kill jerry garcia!
I wanna kick that skeleton in his teeth
Id wanna kick pigpen if he were alive
I dont want to go back in time
I want to kill jerry garcia!
Kill jerry

song performed by Everclear
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The Ballad Of Jerry

the ballad of jerry
Sad was the day
and sharp was the noise
when the hang out kid saw
that his punishment came
He spent too much time
in praying for joy
It's all about a boy
First came the flashes
followed by crashes
when jealousy rose
in the form of a pistol
Just ashes of wishes
remained in his dishes
It's all about a boy
Jerry can dance,finally
Left all his plans
so far behind
Jerry can dance
it's plain to see
For the last time tonight
Between the sky
and the planks of the scaffold
when the wind it kneels down
and says: God bless you boy
His prayer for bliss
it had been raffled
it's all about a boy
Jerry can dance, finally
Left all his plans so far behind
Jerry can dance it's plain to see
Fot the last time tonight
Jery can dance finally
Left all his plans so far behind
Jerry can dance,
it's hellish to see
For the last time tonight
What have you done sonny-boy
now you're dancing there
on your own
You've got your rope
you're jerking alone

song performed by Quimby
Added by Lucian Velea
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Jerry Is A Man

Margaret bought him from a Phoenix laboratory
Outrage he'd get the axe, in the literal of sense
Cargrew thought her mad, and took it all in strides
Brownie was displeased and said it was her spit
But she said it was concern for all utensils right
Because Jerry is a man not a dog food machine

He was just a cattle Joe engineered for sanitation
Built for odd job routines, across the corporate nation
Labor made his paradise, benefits with no insurance
His occupation hazards were befitting for compensation
Which he got in payment of non brand name cigarettes
It was just the perfect timing for a mansion on Malibu

Got an autoclave Zamboni for a test tube baby daddy
Factory commissioned with a brand name on his sleeve
Though his intelligence quotation is below a baby elephant
He’s an expert with his fingers above anthropoid development
Built completely from scratch with proteins that can match
There’s nothing faulty in his conscience because he’s just a man
And Jerry is a man

Give him supplementary pretzels to fulfill his beer nutrition
On Monday night football we’ll convert him to couch addiction
Teach him how to gossip and learn the art of saying “shut up”
He can read you William Keats or use his teeth for a can of beans
There’s never lover’s quarrel’s when he conditioned for your needs
Jerry’s truly the perfect man you could use him on your team

Lawyers are pulling rabbits to get his civil rights in practice
The three laws of Robotics say nothing about love mechanics
Accept to prove he’d sell his brother just to get a cigarette
He’s articulated to lies to save his own self perseverance
If that does not make him a man then we are all just chimps
Because Jerry is a man who can run from bombs and girls

Sine quo non I think he can
Proclaim his conscience his civil stance
Tabula Rasa therefore he is:
A Sentient modem in the microwave sense
Ex nihlo deux ex machine:
Shock absorb the silicon madman’s dream
Confused about our parts until where bone machines
But only when there are guns behind your back
Confidence assures you what in life you should pack
Fortune favors the bold, to those who are men
And Jerry is defiantly every inch a bold bull
For Jerry is a man

poem by Kevin Patrick
Added by Poetry Lover
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Sing Your Life

Sing your life
Any fool can think of words that rhyme
Many others do
Why dont you ?
Do you want to ?
Oh...
Sing your life
Walk right up to the microphone
And name
All the things you love
All the things that you loathe
Oh, sing your life
The things that you love
And the things you loathe
Oh, sing your life
Oh, sing your life
La, la-la, la-la, sing your life
La, la-la, la-la, sing your life
Others sang your life
But now is a chance to shine
And have the pleasure of
Saying what you mean
Have the pleasure of
Meaning what you sing
Oh, make no mistake my friend
All of this will end
So sing it now (sing your life)
All the things you love (sing your life)
All the things you loathe
Oh, sing your life
The things that you love
And the things you loathe (sing your life)
Oh, sing oh...
Oh, sing oh...
La, la-la, la-la, sing your life
La, la-la, la-la, sing your life
Dont leave it all unsaid
Somewhere in the wasteland of your head, oh
Head, oh, head, oh, head, oh
And make no mistake, my friend
Your pointless life will end
But before you go
Can you look at the truth ?
You have a lovely singing voice
A lovely singing voice
And all of those
Who sing on-key
They stole the notion
From you and me
So, sing your life (sing your life)

[...] Read more

song performed by Morrissey
Added by Lucian Velea
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