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Winona Ryder

I've learned that it's OK to be flawed.

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Stripped, Clawed and Flawed

Too many rather skip to a bar and nip.
Until they feel an alcoholic 'trip'.
And sit refusing to admit...
They're drowning denials that cause them fits.

Too many feel henpecked and nitpicked.
By spouses ripping them to bits.
And they choose then to bemoan their whims.
With others near,
Befriending them!

Spending every dime and feeling sick.
Leaving drunk with no left tip!
Stripped, clawed and flawed,
From a baring of emotions felt so raw!

Spending every dime and feeling sick.
Leaving drunk with no left tip!
Stripped, clawed and flawed.
And wishing they had not flapped,
Or dropped jaws.

Stripped, clawed and flawed,
From a baring of emotions felt so raw!
Around strangers who now know all!
And wishing they had not dropped jaws.

Stripped,
Clawed and flawed.
From a baring of emotions felt so raw!
Around strangers who now know all!
And wishing they had not dropped jaws!

Stripped,
Clawed and flawed.

'You left me not tip? '

Flawed and clawed.

'You left me not tip? '

Clawed and flawed

'You left me not tip? '

Flawed and clawed.

Stripped,
Clawed and flawed.

[...] Read more

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I've learned

Ive learned that to love someone doesnt have to involve pain,
Ive learned that to have a friend you must be a friend first,
Ive learned that in time youll see your mistakes and learn from them,
Ive learned that to be alone sometimes is the best thing for you,
Ive learned that in order to love a person you must feel loved,
Ive learned that if your wrong admit it or youll never forgive yourself,
Ive learned that your first love will be a part of you and you may never forget,
Ive learned that in order to move on you must fix what was first wrong,
Ive learned that if you ever mess up, you can always start over again,
Ive learned that to be 'cool' doesnt involve pressure,
Ive learned to accept what I have and be happy,
Ive learned that people will come and go so tell the ones you love how you feel,
Ive learned that to respect yourself you must respect others,
Ive learned that your actions always involve consequences whether it be good or bad,
Ive learned that priceless words can mean the world to someone,
Ive learned that sometimes being silent is the best solution,
Ive learned to expect the unexpected,
Ive learned that healing a broken heart involves tears and pain,
Ive learned to see the world in the eyes of others,
And Ive learned that each new day is a day to touch a life.

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Any Soldier To His Son

What did I do, sonny, in the Great World War?
Well, I learned to peel potatoes and to scrub the barrack floor.
I learned to push a barrow and I learned to swing a pick,
I learned to turn my toes out, and to make my eyeballs click.
I learned the road to Folkestone, and I watched the English shore,
Go down behind the skyline, as I thought, for evermore.
And the Blighty boats went by us and the harbour hove in sight,
And they landed us and sorted us and marched us "by the right".
"Quick march!" across the cobbles, by the kids who rang along
Singing "Appoo?" "Spearmant" "Shokolah?" through dingy old Boulogne;
By the widows and the nurses and the niggers and Chinese,
And the gangs of smiling Fritzes, as saucy as you please.

I learned to ride as soldiers ride from Etaps to the Line,
For days and nights in cattle trucks, packed in like droves of swine.
I learned to curl and kip it on a foot of muddy floor,
And to envy cows and horses that have beds of beaucoup straw.
I learned to wash in shell holes and to shave myself in tea,
While the fragments of a mirror did a balance on my knee.
I learned to dodge the whizz-bangs and the flying lumps of lead,
And to keep a foot of earth between the sniper and my head.
I learned to keep my haversack well filled with buckshee food,
To take the Army issue and to pinch what else I could.
I learned to cook Maconochie with candle-ends and string,
With "four-by-two" and sardine-oil and any God-dam thing.
I learned to use my bayonet according as you please
For a breadknife or a chopper or a prong for toasting cheese.
I learned "a first field dressing" to serve my mate and me
As a dish-rag and a face-rag and a strainer for our tea.
I learned to gather souvenirs that home I hoped to send,
And hump them round for months and months and dump them in the end.
I learned to hunt for vermin in the lining of my shirt,
To crack them with my finger-nail and feel the beggars spirt;
I learned to catch and crack them by the dozen and the score
And to hunt my shirt tomorrow and to find as many more.

I learned to sleep by snatches on the firestep of a trench,
And to eat my breakfast mixed with mud and Fritz's heavy stench.
I learned to pray for Blighty ones and lie and squirm with fear,
When Jerry started strafing and the Blighty ones were near.
I learned to write home cheerful with my heart a lump of lead
With the thought of you and mother, when she heard that I was dead.
And the only thing like pleasure over there I ever knew,
Was to hear my pal come shouting, "There's a parcel, mate, for you."

So much for what I did do - now for what I have not done:
Well, I never kissed a French girl and I never killed a Hun,
I never missed an issue of tobacco, pay, or rum,
I never made a friend and yet I never lacked a chum.
I never borrowed money, and I never lent - but once

[...] Read more

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Fatally Flawed

Ive become fatally flawed. Like the writing on the prison wall. Forever suppose to walk in failure chin up, and smiling. I feel like dying. I've become so fatally flawed. I feel like its just beneath the skin. An abomination. Please someone i need some intervention. Because I've become so fatally flawed. Every bodies going to the ball. But you just not invited. Like you got a contagious cancer. Its never an easy answer. But I've become flawed. In a depression that continuously spinning. Is this life really worth living. Just make it all go away. I want to feel everything's okay. Because Ive become fatally flawed. My souls dead but my body still moves. Ive become fatally flawed. I'm already dead to you.

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First Year University Expereinces

I learned why it is not wise to skip class often

I learned that skipping homework in university is not the same as skipping homework in high school

I learned what it feels like to be awake for over 2 days

I learned how to smoke pot from a bong

I learned how to compose an essay the day before it's due

I learned that the Freshman 15 is no joke

I learned how to do laundry

I learned to pretend to be happy

I learned to multitask

I learned to be more sociable

I learned why my parents and teachers warned me about the difficulty of university

I learned that failing is expensive

I learned small things, like freshly washed bed sheets, make me happy
I learned to lie

I learned how expensive alcohol is

I learned what it feels like to be a failure

I type this rant while skipping my business ethics class as I further delay the composition of my psychology term paper

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The Sound Of Wings.....

from the bars of the cell,
i learned freedom from the body.
from the underside of the bridge,
i learned home has not a house.
from forty years of working,
i learned the bitterness of the slave.
from the political lies,
i learned that truth cant be bought.
from the books i read,
i learned to reason and question.
from the heroin needle,
i learned the value of life.
from love lost,
i learned how to love.
from doubt i learned seeking,
in seeking i found god to be more.
from the scars on my heart,
i learned to be a man.
from battles fought and lost,
i learned the need for peace.
from discrimination i learned equality,
from anger i learned forgiveness.
from the mirror i learned responsibility...
from the bars of the cell,
i learned the sound of wings!

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Perfectly Flawed

I am perfectly flawed,
I am my own enemy,
I hate what I become,
I hate my weight, my height, my face, my race
I hate almost everything about myself,
We are who we chose to be,
I use drugs as my gateway to happiness,
Its the same ol' things I do,
I am a mistake,
I am a disgrace to everyone.
Our perfection will kill us all,
We are perfectly flawed,
We are a thing in the past,
We chose our own deaths through our weight and suicide,
Suicide is a cowards way out,
I am who I am,
We all have our own perfection and flaws,
I am perfectly flawed,
We are beautiful inside and out,
We are who we are.


(I thank Otep for the title to their music but this poem is all freestlye....
Their song got me thinking about this poem....Otep - Perfectly Flawed)

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Once You've Learned To Be Lonely

You're askin' me to open up
I'm tryin' my best to give enough
To keep this love alive
It wouldn't be so hard for me to do
If it hadn't have been
For all my heart's been through
But once you've learned to be lonely
And lonely is the only thing you've known
It begins to feel like home
It becomes your comfort zone
Once you've learned to be without someone
And settle for the silence of an empty room
Oh, it changes you
There's a lot you have to undo
Once you've learned to be lonely
It becomes a habit of the heart
To be afraid to even start
To try and love again
I want to give myself to you
But I've been alone so long
That I'm scared, scared to move
But once you've learned to be lonely
And lonely is the only thing you've known
It begins to feel like home
It becomes your comfort zone
Once you've learned to be without someone
And settle for the silence of an empty room
Oh, it changes you
There's a lot you have to undo
Once you've learned to be lonely
I've built these walls but I feel them fallin' down
Touch by touch your love is my way out
But once you've learned to be lonely
And lonely is the only thing you've known
It begins to feel like home
It becomes your comfort zone
Once you've learned to be without someone
And settle for the silence of an empty room
Oh, it changes you
There's a lot you have to undo
Once you've learned to be lonely
There's a lot you have to undo
Once you've learned to be lonely

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Epiphany, Dead Man Walking

i learned to walk again,
the day you drove away
and left me standing in the drive...

i learned to see again,
staring at old photographs
in a book hid away.

i learned to think again,
thinking, and rethinking
every move and every action.

i learned to feel again,
struck dumb with waves of sorrow,
with blood on my lips.

i learned to cry again,
in the dark and sleepless night,
when no one else could see.

i learned to fight again,
pushed back against the wall
with nothing left to lose.

i learned to pray again,
to a God that doesnt answer,
from the gates of hell.

i learned to dream again,
violent shaking nightmares,
waking up to a cold sweat.

i learned to love again
to cherish every moment,
every touch forgotten.

i learned to walk again,
and walked off into the sunset
with our hearts in my hands.

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In the Giving There's A Benefit

To have awakened is a good thing to be!

And I have learned,
In the many years it has taken me to do it...
That the being there for someone else,
Will not automatically be interpretated...
As an appreciation to be shown one day,
With a reciprocation known that's received.

I have learned,
There will be many taking others for granted...
With a doing which is believed,
A duty to misuse someone dependable.
Until a reality hits and a doing this is missed.
And a waiting to sit by a telephone,
Wishing to hear it ring is a familiar sound gone.

I have learned,
In the giving there's a benefit.
And I have learned,
Those who give are not desperate.

To have awakened is a good thing to be.
And I have learned,
Those who give are not desperate.
I have learned,
In the giving there's a benefit.
And I have learned...
To leave alone,
Those who take for granted...
Someone giving up their time to misuse.

I have learned,
In the giving there's a benefit.
And I have learned...
Those who give are not desperate.
Oh yes I've learned...
To leave alone,
Those who take for granted...
Someone giving up their time to abuse.

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Vindicated

Hope dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption
Winding in and winding out
The shine ahead has caught my eye
And roped me in so mesmerizing
It's so hypnotizing
I am captivated
I am
Vindicated
I am selfish
I am wrong
I am right
I swear I'm right
Swear I knew it all along
And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now
The things you swore you saw yourself
So clear
Like the diamond in your ring
Cut to mirror your intention
Oversized and overwhelmed
The shine of which has caught my eye
And rendered me so
Isolated so
Motivated I am
Certain now that I am
Vindicated
I am selfish
I am wrong
I am right
I swear I'm right
Swear I knew it all along
And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now
The things you swore you saw yourself
So tired of the corners of your lips
Part them and feel my finger tips
Trace the moment for forever
Defense is paper thin
Just one touch and I'd be in
Too deep now to ever swim
Against the current
So let me slip away
So let me slip away
So let me slip away
So let me slip against the current
So let me slip away
So let me slip away

[...] Read more

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Someone I Won't Miss

There’s fire in your eyes
No, wait thats just your lies
Sorry did I make you sad
Well I really don’t feel bad

You hurt me, left me scared and clawed
I never knew you were so flawed

Don’t worry I give it all back
Because I realised I never did lack
All those things you said I missed
Once I got out the poison of your kiss

You hurt me, left me scared and clawed
I never knew you were so flawed

Once I thought I was so alive
No more struggling to survive
But you showed me I was wrong
Showed me everyone betrays you before long

You hurt me, left me scared and clawed
I never knew you were so flawed

But now I’m so happy and free
Coz without you I can be me
So let me just say this
You are someone I will I never miss

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What I Learned Today

What I learned today is that there will be a tomorrow,
what I learned today is the truth is full of pain and sorrow.

What I learned yesterday is people make mistakes,
what I learned yesterday is I will do whatever it takes.

What I learned Saturday when i watched you leave I take back
what I said, what I learned Saturday is when we fought i dread.

What I learned now is that part of my heart is gone,
what I learned now is you will no longer wake me up at dawn.

It is quiet with out you,
I feel I have many things to do.

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Live To Tell (Live)

I have a tale to tell
Sometimes it gets so hard to hide it well
I was not ready for the fall
Too blind to see the writing on the wall
A man can tell a thousand lies
Ive learned my lesson well
Hope I live to tell the secrets I have learned, till then
It will burn inside of me
I know where beauty lives
Ive seen it once I know the warmth she gives
The light that you could never see
It shines inside, you cant take that from me
A man can tell a thousand lies
Ive learned my lesson well
Hope I live to tell the secrets I have learned, till then
It will burn inside of me
The truth is never far behind
You kept it hidden well
If I live to tell the secrets I knew then
Will I ever have a chance again ?
If I ran away, Id never have the strength to go very far
How would they hear the beating of my heart ?
Will it grow cold the secrets that I hide ? Will I grow old ?
How would they hear ? They would they learn ?
How would they know ?
A man can tell a thousand lies
Ive learned my lesson well
Hope I live to tell the secrets I have learned, till then
It will burn inside of me
The truth is never far behind
You kept it hidden well
If I live to tell the secrets I knew then
Will I ever have a chance again ?
A man can tell a thousand lies
Ive learned my lesson well
Hope I live to tell the secrets I have learned, till then
It will burn inside of me
Madonna
Du Film At Close Range

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Ready To Meet Him

[talking]
Please give me the strength I need to live...
Bear with me
Amen
We each walk the path, that weve chosen
[chorus]
Im ready to meet him,
Were Im living aint right
Black hate white
White hate black
Its right back
To the same fight
They got us suspecting a war
But the real war is to follow the law of the lord
Lord, you left me stranded
And I dont know why
Told me to live my life,
Now Im ready to die
Ready to fly
I cry, but I shed no tears
You told me you would dead those fears, its been years
Snakes still coming at me
Just missing
Sometimes I think all you doing me is just listen
I thought that I was special
Thats what you told me
Hold me
Stop acting like you dont know me
Whatd I do so bad that it sent you away from me
Not only sent you away, but made you stay away from me
(my child Im here, as Ive always been, it was you who went away,
And now are back again, what did I say? )
Follow your word, and be true
(what did you do? )
Wellwhat I wanted to do...
(what have you seen? )
Darkness and hell at a glance
(what do you want? )
All I want is another chance
Chorus
(just because you went away, my doors are not locked, wanna come back home,
All you gotta do is knock)
Ya see, I left home a boy, I returned as a man
Full grown, and Im still not able to stand
(I gave you a hand)
Well...but I was looking the wrong way
Figured out the plan, then I started to pray
And that prayer, took me from here to over there
Back to over here,
Now they got me like where?

[...] Read more

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How We Learned Our Lessons

Through the living of their lives...
That's how we learned our lessons.
Through the observation of their sacrifices...
That's how we learned our lessons.

And we understood each one of them.
With our minds, eyes and ears opened.
Through the living of their lives...
That's how we learned our lessons.

Through the acceptance and loving ourselves.
That's how we learned our lessons.
Through the giving of respect,
We ourselves sometimes did not get!
That's how we learned our lessons.

And even though our steps made forward...
Were made to believe by others as limited.
And sometimes we wept and knew this was negative.
It was through the acceptance of who we were,
And loving ourselves.
That's how we learned our lessons.

And the parents we loved and had,
Did not brag about their college degrees!
Or 'things' with them we could buy to achieve...
To succeed in the repossessing of our minds,
Some permit an entry for this to be done!

They were with us all the time,
Telling us we could accomplish anything!
And could prove that too to ourselves and anyone.
'Whatever' it was we chose in our lives to do.
And working hard we did...
To pursue.

Through the living of their lives...
That's how we learned our lessons.
Through the observation of their sacrifices...
That's how we learned our lessons.

Dedicated to:
Andrea ('Mimmie') , Tammy and Lisa
My sisters.

'Love you for your 'gifts' given...
Edna Pearl Roberts Prudhomme Pertillar
And Lawrence Pertillar, Sr.'

[...] Read more

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Learned...

from being homeless,
i learned the value of home!
from being hungry,
i learned the value of being fed.
from being sick,
i learned the value of health.
from being left alone,
i learned the value of love.
from being confined in a cell,
i learned the value of freedom.
from being persecuted,
i learned the value of human rights.
from being an infidel,
i learned to see the face of god...

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While You Were Gone

Hmm, whoa, yeah, oh baby, hmm, oh
I read you wrong
You said youd only be away a while
But the days turned into weeks
And all the weeks into miles
Baby why?
You couldve told me you were telling me goodbye
Couldve come clean and let me walk away in style, oh
Funny thing is
While I was missing you
While I was figuring what I was gonna do
1 - I got wise, I got hip
I caught on to your tricks
I got over it real quick, yeah baby
While you were gone
Now Im cool, cant you tell
Feel so good about myself
A funny thing happened to me baby
While you were gone
Oh, you looked surprised
Like no one ever left you and survived, no
Well leaving me alone has kind of opened my eyes
Baby you, you gave me the time to find somebody new
And I found strength inside me I never knew, oh
Funny thing is
While he was holding me
While he was showing me how its suppose to be
Repeat 1
Repeat 1 with ad-libs by kelly
Didnt freak, didnt cry
I just held my head up high
I learned how to say goodbye
While you were gone
Had time on my hands
Baby dont you understand
A funny thing happened to me baby
While you were gone
Had nothing but time on my hands
Learned how to understand boy
Got over you, got over you, oh
While he was holding me
While he was showing me how its suppose to be
Oh baby
Repeat 1
While you were gone, oh
Learned to lie, learned a lesson
Learned how to get along, learned how to be strong
Learned how to love myself, while you were gone, ooh, oh

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Edmund Spenser

The Teares of the Muses

Rehearse to me ye sacred Sisters nine:
The golden brood of great Apolloes wit,
Those piteous plaints and sorrowful sad tine,
Which late ye powred forth as ye did sit
Beside the siluer Springs of Helicone,
Making your musick of hart-breaking mone.
For since the time that Phoebus foolish sonne
Ythundered through Ioues auengefull wrath,
For trauersing the charret of the Sunne
Beyond the compasse of his pointed path,
Of you his mournfull Sisters was lamented,
Such mournfull tunes were neuer since inuented.

Nor since that faire Calliope did lose
Her loued Twinnes, the dearlings of her ioy,
Her Palici, whom her vnkindly foes
The fatall Sisters, did for spight destroy,
Whom all the Muses did bewaile long space;
Was euer heard such wayling in this place.

For all their groues, which with the heauenly noyses,
Of their sweete instruments were wont to sound,
And th' hollow hills, from which their siluer voyces
Were wont redoubled Echoes to rebound,
Did now rebound with nought but rufull cries,
And yelling shrieks throwne vp into the skies.

The trembling streames, which wont in chanels cleare
To romble gently downe with murmur soft,
And were by them right tunefull taught to beare
A Bases part amongst their consorts oft;
Now forst to ouerflowe with brackish teares,
With troublous noyse did dull their daintie eares.

The ioyous Nymphes and lightfoote Faeries
Which thether came to heare their musick sweet,
And to the measure of their melodies
Did learne to moue their nimble shifting feete;
Now hearing them so heauily lament,
Like heauily lamenting from them went.

And all that els was wont to worke delight
Through the diuine infusion of their skill,
And all that els seemd faire and fresh in sight,
So made by nature for to serue their will,
Was turned now to dismall heauinesse,
Was turned now to dreadfull vglinesse.

Ay me, what thing on earth that all thing breeds,
Might be the cause of so impatient plight?

[...] Read more

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I Have Learned

I had been told 'never' to say never.
And for as long as I lived,
I will learn a 'never' said will return.

And I found that to be true.
I have learned to focus and remain conscious.
Never to keep repeating the same mistakes.

I have learned,
The giving of oneself...
Opens the door to heartache.

I have learned,
Forgiveness for some...
Means a forgetting for them to what they've done.

I have learned,
A revolving door...
Revolves not solve solutions.

I have learned,
A no does not mean yes...
To a depleting of my happiness.

I have learned,
Never to allow my peace of mind...
To be plucked by anyone wishing to get on my nerves.

I have learned,
THAT!
And 'that' aint gon' happen no mo'!
Never.

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