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Down with Dukes of Hazzard!

quote by Alec Baldwin
Added by Lucian Velea
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From Hillbilly Heaven, To Honky Tonk Hell

(michael huffman/woody mullis/mike geiger)
On a hillside in hazzard
Sets a new double-wide
Gods little acre
Your paradise
A poor boy found heaven
With a good country girl
He had all he wanted
She was his whole world
But working the coal mine
Can wear a man down
He started spending
Too much time in town
He found temptation
Fell under its spell
And hillbilly heaven
Went to honky tonk hell
From hillbilly heaven
To honky tonk hell
From a warm home fire burning
To a cold, cheap motel
And an angel is crying
cause her good man fell
From hillbilly heaven
To honky tonk hell
Somewhere in hazzard
On a dark, dead-end street
Where whiskey and heartache
And old memories meet
He looks for salvation
In a bottle each night
And just goes on livin
Though hes lost his life
Now theres a job in the coal mine
That needs to be filled
And a heartache in hazzard
That wont ever heal
He had it all
Now its all for sale
And hillbilly heavens
Gone to honky tonk hell
From hillbilly heaven
To honky tonk hell
From a warm home fire burning
To a cold, cheap motel
And an angel is crying
cause her good man fell
From hillbilly heaven
To honky tonk hell
Hes gone from hillbilly heaven

[...] Read more

song performed by Kenny Chesney
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Consumption

ft. Aceyalone

[Prevail]
dukes in my horizon pass the time of day with me
dukes in my horizon pass the time of day with me
dukes in my horizon pass the time of day with me
the earth's surface height is global
so watch the stealth sport
I freed you to the odd of firearms
I was a specimen of near perfection in a college professor's pod
now I'm the only thing you should be fearing for the next millennium clearing
if only time will tell then I'll tell time
no secrets like he doesn't know
I throw beggar's bullets at baley's barn
there'll be bullets over Broadway for all of our faults

[Aceyalone]
people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones
people who live in glass houses don't throw stones
people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones
because they risk having boulders crash down on their lovely homes
thin wind rain sleet snow cones come showering through your roof
you need a fine toothed comb to find the truth
well my house ain't made of glass and my chariot ain't no pumpkin
I'm not a backyard bumpkin I'm from the concrete slab
where people taking anything and everything that they can grab
what's so bad is a whole lotta grabbin
a lotta jar jabbin
gremlins

song performed by Swollen Members from Balance
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Dukes Up

So you wonder how
Get em up, put em up
Get your dukes up now
Got no time no money, thats why
Get em up, put em up
Get your dukes up now
Soda fountain crowd
Button up, shut em up
Gettin fed up now
Got no time, no money, thats why
Get em up, put em up
Get your dukes up, now

song performed by Modest Mouse
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Modern Dukes

Every time that I turn around
I just see the same old thing
Beg to try and to bring me back
To the place I couldn't keep
But I'm an asshole
Storm the castle
Burn the bridges
Down to the ground
Take no prisoners
We're just visiting
We don't care about anything
Thats the way these modern dukes will go
It's every man here for himself
Every time that I turn around
I just see the same old crap
Trucks are trying to grease the wheels
So that they can get laid back
But I'm an asshole
Storm the castle
Burn the bridges
Down to the ground
Take no prisoners
We're just visiting
We don't care about anything
That's the way these modern dukes will go
It's every man here for himself
I'm an asshole
Storm the castle
Burn the bridges
Down to the ground
Take no prisoners
We're just visiting
We don't care about anything
I'm an asshole
Storm the castle
Burn the bridges
Down to the ground
Take no prisoners
We're just visiting
We don't care about anything
That's the way these modern dukes will go
It's every man here for himself

song performed by Weezer
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King Of Groove

Morris butch stewart
Everybody wants to be a star
Everybody wants to be accepted by the mass
Everybody wants to be raging fire
But their heat dont last
Everybody wanta peek into my dreams
They try to figure out if Im just full of jive
Everybody wanta ride in my limousine
But nobody wants to drive
Chorus:
But Im the king
Im the king of groove
Yes Im the king
Im the king of groove
Hes the king of groove (I cantt lose)
(summon the royal brass)
Everybody want a piece of the pie
But theyll take a pass if its a case of do or die
The greener syndrome is at hand
Well kick the feline or come forth and take a stand
If youre wishing on a star
Ooh I pray your wishes bring you to receive the call
The king of groove is going far
And in my kingdom there is room for all
Chorus:
cause Im the king
Im the king of groove
Yes Im the king
Im the king of groove
Bridge:
King of groove
I cant lose,
Stand back and watch my moves
cause Im the king of groove
Im the king yeah Im the king
Yeah iiiIm the king of groove
Hes the king of groove
Thats right
Bridge:
Well, youve got your
This of that and your that of this
With the king of groove baby you cant miss
You got your joan of arc
And your house of wax
But with the king of groove
Youll be jammin back
You got your dukes of hazzard and your duke of earl
And the queen of sheba, she was one bad girl
Aretha franklin, shes the queen of soul
But the king of groove

[...] Read more

song performed by Earth Wind And Fire
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EBAY

Parody of "I Want It That Way" by the Backstreet Boys
Yeah
A used...pink bathrobe
A rare...mint snow globe
A Smurf...TV tray
I bought on eBay
My house...is filled with this crap
Shows up in bubble wrap
Most every day
What I bought on eBay
Tell me why (I need another pet rock)
Tell me why (I got that Alf alarm clock)
Tell me why (I bid on Shatner's old toupee)
They had it on eBay
I'll buy...your knick-knack
Just check...my feedback
"A++!" they all say
They love me on eBay
Gonna buy (a slightly damaged golf bag)
Gonna buy (some Beanie Babies, new with tag)
(From some guy) I've never met in Norway
Found him on eBay
I am the type who is liable to snipe you
With two seconds left to go, whoa
Got Paypal or Visa, whatever'll please ya
As long as I've got the dough
I'll buy...your tchotchkes
Sell me..your watch, please
I'll buy (I'll buy, I'll buy, I'll buy...)
I'm highest bidder now
(Junk keeps arriving in the mail)
(From that worldwide garage sale)
(Hey! A Dukes of Hazzard ashtray)
Oh yeah...(I bought it on eBay)
Wanna buy (a PacMan Fever lunchbox)
Wanna buy (a case of vintage tube socks)
(Wanna buy a Kleenex used by Dr. Dre)
(Found it on eBay)
Wanna buy (that Farrah Fawcett poster)
(Pez dispensers and a toaster)
(Don't know why...The kind of stuff you'd throw away)
(I'll buy on eBay)
What I bought on eBay

song performed by Weird Al Yankovic
Added by Lucian Velea
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Canto the Eleventh

I
When Bishop Berkeley said "there was no matter,"
And proved it -- 't was no matter what he said:
They say his system 't is in vain to batter,
Too subtle for the airiest human head;
And yet who can believe it? I would shatter
Gladly all matters down to stone or lead,
Or adamant, to find the world a spirit,
And wear my head, denying that I wear it.

II
What a sublime discovery 't was to make the
Universe universal egotism,
That all's ideal -- all ourselves! -- I'll stake the
World (be it what you will) that that's no schism.
Oh Doubt! -- if thou be'st Doubt, for which some take thee;
But which I doubt extremely -- thou sole prism
Of the Truth's rays, spoil not my draught of spirit!
Heaven's brandy, though our brain can hardly bear it.

III
For ever and anon comes Indigestion,
(Not the most "dainty Ariel") and perplexes
Our soarings with another sort of question:
And that which after all my spirit vexes,
Is, that I find no spot where man can rest eye on,
Without confusion of the sorts and sexes,
Of beings, stars, and this unriddled wonder,
The world, which at the worst's a glorious blunder --

IV
If it be chance; or if it be according
To the old text, still better: -- lest it should
Turn out so, we'll say nothing 'gainst the wording,
As several people think such hazards rude.
They're right; our days are too brief for affording
Space to dispute what no one ever could
Decide, and everybody one day will
Know very clearly -- or at least lie still.

V
And therefore will I leave off metaphysical
Discussion, which is neither here nor there:
If I agree that what is, is; then this I call
Being quite perspicuous and extremely fair;
The truth is, I've grown lately rather phthisical:
I don't know what the reason is -- the air
Perhaps; but as I suffer from the shocks
Of illness, I grow much more orthodox.

[...] Read more

poem by Byron from Don Juan (1824)
Added by Veronica Serbanoiu
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In Defense

You may say, if you please, Johnny Bull, that our girls
Are crazy to marry your dukes and your earls;
But I've heard that the maids of your own little isle
Greet bachelor lords with a favoring smile.

Nay, titles, 'tis said in defense of our fair,
Are popular here because popular there;
And for them our ladies persistently go
Because 'tis exceedingly English, you know.

Whatever the motive, you'll have to confess
The effort's attended with easy success;
And-pardon the freedom-'tis thought, over here,
'Tis mortification you mask with a sneer.

It's all very well, sir, your scorn to parade
Of the high nasal twang of the Yankee maid,
But, ah, to my lord when he dares to propose
No sound is so sweet as that 'Yes' from the nose.

Our ladies, we grant, walk alone in the street
(Observe, by-the-by, on what delicate feet!)
'Tis a habit they got here at home, where they say
The men from politeness go seldom astray.

Ah, well, if the dukes and the earls and that lot
Can stand it (God succor them if they cannot!)
Your commoners ought to assent, I am sure,
And what they 're not called on to suffer, endure.

''Tis nothing but money?' 'Your nobles are bought?'
As to that, I submit, it is commonly thought
That England's a country not specially free
Of Croesi and (if you'll allow it) Croesae.

You've many a widow and many a girl
With money to purchase a duke or an earl.
'Tis a very remarkable thing, you'll agree,
When goods import buyers from over the sea.

Alas for the woman of Albion's isle!
She may simper; as well as she can she may smile;
She may wear pantalettes and an air of repose
But my lord of the future will talk through his nose.

poem by Ambrose Bierce
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In Defense

You may say if you please, Johnny Bull, that our girls
Are crazy to marry your dukes and your earls;
But I've heard that the maids of your own little isle
Greet bachelor lords with a favoring smile.

Nay, titles, 'tis said in defense of our fair,
Are popular here because popular there;
And for them our ladies persistently go
Because 'tis exceedingly English, you know.

Whatever the motive, you'll have to confess
The effort's attended with easy success;
And-pardon the freedom-'tis thought, over here,
'Tis mortification you mask with a sneer.

It's all very well, sir, your scorn to parade
Of the high nasal twang of the Yankee maid,
But, ah, to my lord when he dares to propose
No sound is so sweet as that 'Yes' from the nose.

Ah, well, if the dukes and the earls and that lot
Can stand it (God succor them if they can not!)
Your commoners ought to assent, I am sure,
And what they're not called on to suffer, endure.

''Tis nothing but money?-your nobles are bought'?
As to that, I submit, it is commonly thought
That England's a country not specially free
Of Croesi and (if you'll allow it) Croesæ.

You've many a widow and many a girl
With money to purchase a duke or an earl.
'Tis a very remarkable thing, you'll agree,
When goods import buyers from over the sea.

Alas for the woman of Albion's isle!
She may simper; as well as she can she may smile;
She may wear pantalettes and an air of repose-
But my lord of the future will talk through his nose.

poem by Ambrose Bierce
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Don Juan: Canto the Eleventh

I
When Bishop Berkeley said "there was no matter,"
And proved it--'twas no matter what he sald:
They say his system 'tis in vain to batter,
Too subtle for the airiest human head;
And yet who can believe it! I would shatter
Gladly all matters down to stone or lead,
Or adamant, to find the World a spirit,
And wear my head, denying that I wear it.II
What a sublime discovery 'twas to make the
Universe universal egotism,
That all's ideal--all ourselves: I'll stake the
World (be it what you will) that that's no schism.
Oh Doubt!--if thou be'st Doubt, for which some take thee,
But which I doubt extremely--thou sole prism
Of the Truth's rays, spoil not my draught of spirit!
Heaven's brandy, though our brain can hardly bear it.III

For ever and anon comes Indigestion
(Not the most "dainty Ariel") and perplexes
Our soarings with another sort of question:
And that which after all my spirit vexes,
Is, that I find no spot where Man can rest eye on,
Without confusion of the sorts and sexes,
Of beings, stars, and this unriddled wonder,
The World, which at the worst's a glorious blunder--IV

If it be chance--or, if it be according
To the Old Text, still better: lest it should
Turn out so, we'll say nothing 'gainst the wording,
As several people think such hazards rude.
They're right; our days are too brief for affording
Space to dispute what no one ever could
Decide, and everybody one day will
Know very clearly--or at least lie still.V

And therefore will I leave off metaphysical
Discussion, which is neither here nor there:
If I agree that what is, is; then this I call
Being quite perspicuous and extremely fair.
The truth is, I've grown lately rather phthisical:
I don't know what the reason is--the air
Perhaps; but as I suffer from the shocks
Of illness, I grow much more orthodox.VI

The first attack at once prov'd the Divinity
(But that I never doubted, nor the Devil);
The next, the Virgin's mystical virginity;
The third, the usual Origin of Evil;
The fourth at once establish'd the whole Trinity

[...] Read more

poem by Byron
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The Wobble

Now the Wobble went out on the roaring tide,
With a dry dog trotting along by its side;
Went over the sea - and I vow right here
That the Wobble went out with its views as clear
As ever the views of a Wobble could be;
And the Wobble went out and over the sea.

Went over the sea for to represent
The folk of our island continent;
Went over to England where dukes and lords,
And princes, and barons, and earls in hordes,
And bankers, and boodlers, and scores of Jews
Were burning to hear of Australia's views.

0, the Wobble went over to advertise
(For it was a Wobble of goodly size)
The things that we grow and the things that we breed
Our eggs and our bacon and butter and seed,
The health of our air and the worth of our earth
(For it was a Wobble of generous girth)
And it's quite a true saying, as ev'ryone knows,
A Wobble's a Wobble wherever it goes.

The Wobble went forth from its native land,
And when they espied it adrift on the Strand
All the American tourists laff't:
'Why, if that ain't the double of our old TAFT!'
And when it appeared later on in The Row,
All the duchiest duchesses viewed the show,
And they said: 'There is nothing can advertise
A country so well as a Wobble of size.'

And they asked it along for a feed and a swill,
And a talk after dinner, as Englishmen will,
And there's nothing on earth like a gabble and gobble
Appeals to a healthy and well-bred Wobble.
And when it arose at the festive board
The barons and aldermen loudly roared.
With the dukes and the generals, 'That's the bloke!
That's the famous and only Australian Joke!

'It's the Globular Jest with the Monocled Eye
That makes the Australians 1augh till they cry
The bankers and boodlers and Park Lane Jews
Wept great, glad teara in the jellies and stews;
The Lord High Chancellor spllt his vest,
While the baronets, admirals, peers and the rest
Agreed with the bishops and Irish M.P.'s
That no funnier Wobble came over the seas.

[...] Read more

poem by Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis
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An Elegie on Henry, fourth Erle of Northumberlande

Ad dominum properato meum mea pagina Percy,
Qui Northumbrorum jura paterna gerit.
Ad nutum celebris tu porna repone leonis,
Quaeque suo patri tristia justa cano.
Ast ubi perlegit, dubiam sub mente volutet
Fortunam, cunceta quae male fida rotat.
Qui leo sit felix, et Nestoris occupet annos;
Ad libitum cujus ipse paratus ero.

Skelton Laureat Upon the Dolourus Dethe and Muche Lamentable Chaunce of the Most Honorable Erle of Northumberlande.

I wayle, I wepe, I sobbe, I sigh ful sore
The dedely fate, the dolefulle desteny
Of hym that is gone, alas! without restore,
Of the bloud royall descending nobelly;
Whose lordshyp doutles was slayne lamentably
Thorow treson, ageyn him compassed and wrought,
Trew to his prince in word, in dede, and thought.

Of hevenly poems, O Clyo, calde by name
In the colege of Musis goddess hystoriall,
Adres the to me, whiche am both halt and lame
In elect uteraunce to make memoryall!
To the for souccour, to the for helpe I call,
Mine homely rudnes and dryghnes to expell
With the freshe waters of Elyconys well.

Of noble actes aunciently enrolde
Of famous pryncis and lordes of astate,
Be thy report ar wont to be extold,
Regestringe trewly every formare date;
Of thy bountie after the usuall rate
Kyndell in me suche plenty of thy nobles,
Thes sorrowfulle dites that I may shew expres.

In sesons past, who hathe h[ea]rde or sene
Of formar writyng by any presidente
That vilane hastarddis in their furious tene,
Fulfylled with malice of froward entente,
Confetered togeder of commonn concente
Falsly to slee theyr moste singuler good lord?
It may be regestrede of shamefull recorde.

So noble a man, so valiaunt lord and knyght,
Fulfilled with honor, as all the world doth ken;
At his commaundement which had both day and nyght
Knyghtes and squyers, at every season when
He calde upon them, as meniall household men;

[...] Read more

poem by John Skelton
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A Lay of St. Nicholas

'Statim sacerdoti apparuit diabolus in specie puellæ pulchritudinis miræ, et ecce Divus, fide catholica et cruce et aqua benedicta armatus, venit, et aspersit aquam in nomine Sanctæ et Individuæ Trinitatis, quam, quasi ardentem, diabolus, nequaquam sustinere valens, mugitibus fugit.'
-- Roger Hoveden.

Lord Abbot! Lord Abbot! I'd fain confess;
I am a-weary, and worn with woe;
Many a grief doth my heart oppress,
And haunt me whithersoever I go!'

On bended knee spake the beautiful Maid;
'Now lithe and listen, Lord Abbot, to me!'--
'Now naye, Fair Daughter,' the Lord Abbot said,
'Now naye, in sooth it may hardly be;

'There is Mess Michael, and holy Mess John,
Sage Penitauncers I ween be they!
And hard by doth dwell, in St. Catherine's cell,
Ambrose, the anchorite old and grey!'

'-- Oh, I will have none of Ambrose or John,
Though sage Penitauncers I trow they be;
Shrive me may none save the Abbot alone.
Now listen, Lord Abbot, I speak to thee.

'Nor think foul scorn, though mitre adorn
Thy brow, to listen to shrift of mine.
I am a Maiden royally born,
And I come of old Plantagenet's line.

'Though hither I stray in lowly array,
I am a Damsel of high degree;
And the Compte of Eu, and the Lord of Ponthieu,
They serve my father on bended knee!

'Counts a many, and Dukes a few,
A suitoring came to my father's Hall;
But the Duke of Lorraine, with his large domain,
He pleased my father beyond them all.

'Dukes a many, and Counts a few,
I would have wedded right cheerfullie;
But the Duke of Lorraine was uncommonly plain,
And I vow'd that he ne'er should my bridegroom be!

'So hither I fly, in lowly guise,
From their gilded domes and their princely halls;
Fain would I dwell in some holy cell,
Or within some Convent's peaceful walls!'

-- Then out and spake that proud Lord Abbot,
'Now rest thee, Fair Daughter, withouten fear;

[...] Read more

poem by Richard Harris Barham
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The Periwinkle Girl

I've often thought that headstrong youths
Of decent education,
Determine all-important truths,
With strange precipitation.

The ever-ready victims they,
Of logical illusions,
And in a self-assertive way
They jump at strange conclusions.

Now take my case: Ere sorrow could
My ample forehead wrinkle,
I had determined that I should
Not care to be a winkle.

"A winkle," I would oft advance
With readiness provoking,
"Can seldom flirt, and never dance,
Or soothe his mind by smoking."

In short, I spurned the shelly joy,
And spoke with strange decision -
Men pointed to me as a boy
Who held them in derision.

But I was young - too young, by far -
Or I had been more wary,
I knew not then that winkles are
The stock-in-trade of MARY.

I had not watched her sunlight blithe
As o'er their shells it dances -
I've seen those winkles almost writhe
Beneath her beaming glances.

Of slighting all the winkly brood
I surely had been chary,
If I had known they formed the food
And stock-in-trade of MARY.

Both high and low and great and small
Fell prostrate at her tootsies,
They all were noblemen, and all
Had balances at COUTTS'S.

Dukes with the lovely maiden dealt,
DUKE BAILEY and DUKE HUMPHY,
Who ate her winkles till they felt
Exceedingly uncomfy.

[...] Read more

poem by William Schwenck Gilbert
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Sin Of The City

Coat check girl up in happyland
Has a violent row with a cuban man
Julio leaves in a drunken rage -
Comes back with the gasoline
The club has no fire exit
The club only had one door
Only five people came out alive
The sin is that 89 died
89 dead! 89 dead! 89 dead! 89 dead!
The sin is that a year and a half before
The fire chiefs out and hes raising cain
Brands happyland hazzard close down but no.
No-one ever paid him no mind..
No-one ever paid him no mind..
No-one ever paid him no mind..
No-one ever paid him no mind..
No-one ever paid him no mind..
City living, heavy trouble
City living rough
We are given angry heart
But angers not enough
(chorus)
Daily news reviews of the landlords life
Found six thousand code ciolations light.
The city has more a hundred thousand wars
All for one of forbes four hundred whores.
Just one fire cracker on a big bondfire
Of self serving penny pinching wiseguy style.
Never allowing for the human condition. (hayyyeah)
Never allowing for the human condition. (hayyyeah)
Never allowing for the numen condition.
The sin is that these guys survive.
(chorus) (chorus)
-
The sin of the city yehh (chorus)
Stop killing your people now.
Stop wasting your people now. (chorus)
Your jacking your people off
Sin of the city, yehh (chorus)
Stop killing youre people how.
Youre wasting youre people yeahh. (chorus)

song performed by Duran Duran
Added by Lucian Velea
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Listen To Me

The Hollies
Listen To Me (Tony Hazzard)
Listen to me, I'll sing a song to change your mind.
Have you ever wondered why
when everything goes wrong
nobody stops to lend a hand,
nobody seems to care?
Then she looks you in the eye
and suddenly you're strong,
and very soon you realize that you didn't care about love.
Listen to me, I'll sing a song to change your mind.
Your ears are deaf, your mouth is dumb, your eyes are blind.
Listen to me and very soon I think you'll find,
somebody wants to help you,
somebody seems to care.
And very soon you've forgotten
that you didn't care about love.
Does it hurt to realize
you've been acting very strange,
refusing to take the love she gives,
pretending you don't care?
Did it take you by surprise
to discover how you'd changed -
how you forgot to remember
that you didn't care about love?
Listen to me, I'll sing a song to change your mind. (listen to me)
Your ears are deaf, your mouth is dumb, your eyes are blind.
Listen to me and very soon I think you'll find, (listen to me)
somebody wants to help you,
somebody seems to care.
And very soon you've forgotten
that you didn't care about love.
Listen to me, I'll sing a song to change your mind. (listen to me)
Your ears are deaf, your mouth is dumb, your eyes are blind.
Listen to me and very soon I think you'll find, (listen to me)
somebody wants to help you,
somebody seems to care.
And very soon you've forgotten
that you didn't care about love.
You care 'bout love.
you care 'bout
you care 'bout
you care 'bout love.

song performed by Hollies
Added by Lucian Velea
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Red Army Blues

When I left my home and my family
My mother said to me
Son, its not how many germans you kill that counts
Its how many people you set free
So I packed my bags
Brushed my cap
Walked out into the world
Seventeen years old
Never kissed a girl
Took the train to voronezh
That was as far as it would go
Changed my sacks for a uniform
Bit my lip against the snow
I prayed for mother russia
In the summer of 43
And as we drove the germans back
I really believed
That God was listening to me
We howled into berlin
Tore the smoking buildings down
Raised the red flag high
Burnt the reichstag brown
I saw my first american
And he looked a lot like me
He had the same kinda farmers face
Said hed come from some place called hazzard, tennessee
Then the war was over
My discharge papers came
Me and twenty hundred others
Went to stettiner for the train
Kiev! said the commissar
From there your own way home
But I never got to kiev
We never came by home
Train went north to the taiga
We were stripped and marched in file
Up the great siberian road
For miles and miles and miles and miles
Dressed in stripes and tatters
In a gulag left to die
All because comrade stalin was scared that
Wed become too westernized!
Used to love my country
Used to be so young
Used to believe that life was
The best song ever sung
I would have died for my country
In 1945
But now only one thing remains
But now only one thing remains

[...] Read more

song performed by Waterboys
Added by Lucian Velea
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New-Englands Crisis

IN seventy five the Critick of our years
Commenc'd our war with Phillip and his peers.
Whither the sun in Leo had inspir'd
A feav'rish heat, and Pagan spirits fir'd?
Whither some Romish Agent hatcht the plot?
Or whither they themselves? appeareth not.
Whither our infant thrivings did invite?
Or whither to our lands pretended right?
Is hard to say; but Indian spirits need
No grounds but lust to make a Christian bleed.

And here methinks I see this greazy Lout
With all his pagan slaves coil'd round about,
Assuming all the majesty his throne
Of rotten stump, or of the rugged stone
Could yield; casting some bacon-rine-like looks,
Enough to fright a Student from his books,
Thus treat his peers, and next to them his Commons,
Kennel'd together all without a summons.
"My friends, our Fathers were not half so wise
As we our selves who see with younger eyes.
They sel our land to english man who teach
Our nation all so fast to pray and preach:
Of all our countrey they enjoy the best,
And quickly they intend to have the rest.
This no wunnegin, so big matchit law,
Which our old fathers fathers never saw.
These english make and we must keep them too,
Which is too hard for them or us to doe,
We drink we so big whipt, but english they
Go sneep, no more, or else a little pay.
Me meddle Squaw me hang'd, our fathers kept
What Squaws they would whither they wakt or slept.
Now if you'le fight Ile get you english coats,
And wine to drink out of their Captains throats.
The richest merchants houses shall be ours,
Wee'l ly no more on matts or dwell in bowers
Wee'l have their silken wives take they our Squaws,
They shall be whipt by virtue of our laws.
If ere we strike tis now before they swell
To greater swarmes then we know how to quell.
This my resolve, let neighbouring Sachems know,
And every one that hath club, gun or bow."
This was assented to, and for a close
He strokt his smutty beard and curst his foes.
This counsel lightning like their tribes invade,
And something like a muster's quickly made,
A ragged regiment, a naked swarm,
Whome hopes of booty doth with courage arm,

[...] Read more

poem by Benjamin Tompson
Added by Poetry Lover
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When I find myself in the company of scientists, I feel like a shabby curate who has strayed by mistake into a room full of dukes.

quote by Wystan Hugh Auden
Added by Lucian Velea
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Take all your dukes and marquesses and earls and viscounts, pack them into one chamber, call it the House of Lords to satisfy their pride and then strip it of all political power. It's a solution so perfectly elegant and preposterous that only the British could have managed it.

quote by Charles Krauthammer
Added by Lucian Velea
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