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Tiger Woods

Achievements on the golf course are not what matters, decency and honesty are what matter.

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Adrienne Vittadini

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Handles Bermuda

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Luggage Canada

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Trash Bag

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Fitration Bags

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Golf Tees Lament

Golf tees on my dresser
Golf tees in my bed
Golf tees on my pillows
Where they poke me in my head

Golf tees in my closet
Falling from my shirts and pants
Golf tees along the baseboards
Just like army ants

Golf tees in the carpet
And underneath my feet
Golf tees lined up on the mantle
Oh, they look so neat

Golf tees in my couch
And in my back and thighs
When I sit and watch TV
I feel those little guys

Golf tees in the kitchen
In Jurassic coffee mugs
Sometimes when I pass them
They look like prehistoric bugs.

Golf tees in the bathtub
Like sailors on plastic ships
Golf tee in her make-up
Like little bald q-tips.

Golf tees in the attic
Golf tees in the shed
Golf tees, golf tees everywhere
I wonder where they bred?

Golf tees out the backdoor
Like Hansel-and-Gretel’s trails
Golf tees in the flowerbeds
Among the mulch and snails

Golf tees in my car
And underneath the mats
Golf tees in the backseat
Like little baseball bats

But when I am at the golf course
I ask my partner, like a louse…
“May I borrow some of your tees? ”
I left mine at the house!

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Nothing Even Matters

Now the skies could fall
Not even if my boss should call
The world it seems so very small
'Cause nothing even matters at all

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters at all
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters at all

See I don't need no alcohol
Your love makes me feel ten feet tall
Without it I'd go through withdrawal
'Cause nothing even matters at all

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters at all
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters at all

These buildings could drift out to sea
Some natural catastrophe
Still there's no place I'd rather be
'Cause nothing even matters to me

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters to me
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters to me

You're part of my identity
I sometimes have the tendency
To look at you religiously
'Cause nothing even matters to me

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters to me
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters to me

Now you won't find me at no store
I have no time for manicures
With you it's never either or
'Cause nothing even matters no more

Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters no more
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters no more

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Matterings

'All I want' she said' is to matter.'

'All I want' said the scientist 'is
to understand matter'.

'The problem of life' the philosopher said
'is figuring out what matters'

'The secret' the muse said 'to life
is figuring out what is to matter more
and to learn what matters less

The Lover said
'All that matters to me
is matters of the heart
and I did not matter to him enough.'

'What does it mean to matter
is an world of billions;
what tracings and scratchings
on the globe
can be identified
as mine engraved? ' said the nihilist.

'What if I matter to me and no one else? '
said the Lonely One

'We could all decide that we all matter
to one another in our community
and that would make mattering matter.'
said the preacher.

'Ideas matter' Plato said
'and they are the only thing real.'

'But alas' the writer said
'imagining is the only matter that matters
and besides what does mattering mean? '

Einstein thought all that mattered lived inside
the daydream and the thought experiment.

'What matters' the man of action said
'depends entirely upon circumstance'

What matters' she said 'is empathy
more even than love because the latter
is only inward looking toward The One:
empathy alone looks out to others.

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Doesnt Really Matter

Doesnt really matter
Hmm, he-he
Oh, hey
Doesnt matter (it doesnt matter)
Doesnt matter at all
Doesnt matter what your friends are telling you
Doesnt matter what my familys saying too
It just matters that Im in love with you
It only matters that you love me too
It doesnt matter if they wont accept you
Im accepting of you and the things you do
Just as long as its you
Nobody but you, baby, baby
My love for you, unconditional love too
Gotta get up, get up
Get up, get up, get up and show you that it
Doesnt really matter what the eye is seeing
Cause Im in love with the inner being
And it doesnt really matter what they believe
What matters to me is youre in love with me
Doesnt really matter what the eye is seeing
Cause Im in love with the inner being
And it doesnt really matter what they believe
What matters to me is youre nutty-nutty-nutty for me
(youre so kind)
Just what I asked for, youre so loving and kind
(and youre mine)
And I cant believe youre mine
Doesnt matter if youre feeling insecure
Doesnt matter if youre feeling so unsure
Cause Ill take away the doubt within your heart
And show that my love will never hurt or harm
Doesnt matter what the pain we go through
Doesnt matter if the moneys gone too
Just as long as Im with you
Nobody but you, baby, baby
Youre love for me, unconditional I see
Gotta get up, get up
Get up, get up, get up and show you that it
Doesnt really matter what the eye is seeing
Cause Im in love with the inner being
And it doesnt really matter what they believe
What matters to me is youre in love with me
Doesnt really matter what the eye is seeing
Cause Im in love with the inner being
And it doesnt really matter what they believe
What matters to me is youre nutty-nutty-nutty for me
(youre so kind)
Just what I asked for, youre so loving and kind
(and youre mine)

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Disaster In A Halo

Lately I've been thinking about what you said
Time is growing old and I'm getting colder
Hunger's just a pain that won't be fed
I'll be working for the ghost until I'm dead and done
Over and done, over
Disaster in a halo
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Somewhere there's a girl with thoughts of him
She makes wishes in a well then fears them caving in on her, around, on her
Disaster in a halo
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Cause in the well plans will come and plans will go undone
I know, I know
And you can't tell, I will come and I will do I know, I know
But why would I?
But why would I?
Disaster in a halo
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters
Nothing even matters

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Healthy Back Bag

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Love Is All That Matters

(diane warren)
Sometimes we make each other cry
Sometimes were locked inside the prisons of our pride
Sometimes we break each others heart with the words we say
Let anger get in the way too many times
But always after all
Love is all that matters
After everything
One thing remains the same
One thing we cannot change
We all have one heart
And one heart needs another
Love, love is all that matters
Love is all that matters
It matters after all
Sometimes we search this world for gold
When all we really need is just a hand to hold
Sometimes we let the greatest treasure just slip away
With words we forget to say too many times
But always after all
Love is all that matters
After everything
One thing remains the same
One thing we cannot change
We, we all have one heart
And one heart needs another
Love, love is all that matters
Love is all that matters
It matters after all
After all that weve been through
It comes down to one simple truth
You need me, I need you
cause love is all that matters
Love is all that matters
Love is all that matters
It matters after all
Love is all that matters
Its the only thing that matters
It matters after all
Love is all that matters

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As A Matter Of Fact

Written by s. garrett & d. boyette
Blow daddy, aww, yeah
Here we are, standing at the hard line
We made it last this long
The two of us, together since the first time
And I believe our love is still strong
Seems love has a funny way
Well, it can come or go or it can choose to stay
But love says what it has to say
(chorus)
Matter of fact (ooh, as a matter of fact)
I love you (oh, as a matter of fact)
And I love that you love me back
As a matter of fact (ooh, as a matter, a matter)
Some said we wouldnt make it this far
But they dont talk no more (no more)
The love we share is precious as a big star
And what we haves what others hope for
Seems love has a funny way
Well, it can come or go or it can choose to stay
But love says what it has to say
(chorus)
Matter of fact (ooh, as a matter of fact)
I need you (oh, as a matter of fact)
And Im glad that you need me back
As a matter of fact (ooh, as a matter, a matter)
Mm, matter of fact, yeah (ooh as a matter of fact)
I want you (yeah, as a matter of fact)
And I cant tell you more than that
As a matter of fact, (ooh, as a matter) yeah (matter)
Aww, blow, daddy
Musical interlude
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Seems love has a funny way
Well, it can come and go or it can choose to stay
But love says what it has to say
(repeat chorus)
Matter of fact (ooh, as a matter of fact)
I love you (oh, as a matter of fact)
Yeah and I love that you love me back
As a matter of fact (ooh, as a matter of fact)
Ooh, ooh, baby
Matter of fact (ooh, as a matter of fact)
I need you (yeah, as a matter of fact)
And Im glad that you need me right back
As a matter of fact
(ooh, as a matter) yeah (a matter)

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Matters Of The Heart

I lose my head
From time to time
I make a fool of myself
In matters of the heart
We should have been holding each other
Instead we talked
I make a fool of myself
In matters of the heart
But I asked before
Your reply was kind and polite
One wants more
When ones denied
I make a fool of myself
In matters of the heart
I wont call it love
But it feels good to have passion in my life
If theres a battle
I hope my head always defers to my heart
In matters of the heart
I guess Im crazy to think
I can give you what you dont want
I make a fool of myself
In matters of the heart
I wish that I had the power
To make these feelings stop
I lose all self control
In matters of the heart
I cant believe
Its so hard to find someone
To give affection to
And from whom you can receive
I guess its just the draw of the cards
In matters of the heart
You caught me off guard
Somehow you reached me
Where I thought I had nothing left inside
Ive learned my lesson Ive been edified
In matters of the heart
Ive spent my nights
Where the sleeping dogs lie
Not by your side
It feels so lonely
Once again Ive left to much to chance
In matters of the heart
Here I sit
Im feeling sorry for myself
Its quite a sight
But I have you to thank
For reminding me
Were all alone in this world

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The Ghost - Book IV

Coxcombs, who vainly make pretence
To something of exalted sense
'Bove other men, and, gravely wise,
Affect those pleasures to despise,
Which, merely to the eye confined,
Bring no improvement to the mind,
Rail at all pomp; they would not go
For millions to a puppet-show,
Nor can forgive the mighty crime
Of countenancing pantomime;
No, not at Covent Garden, where,
Without a head for play or player,
Or, could a head be found most fit,
Without one player to second it,
They must, obeying Folly's call,
Thrive by mere show, or not at all
With these grave fops, who, (bless their brains!)
Most cruel to themselves, take pains
For wretchedness, and would be thought
Much wiser than a wise man ought,
For his own happiness, to be;
Who what they hear, and what they see,
And what they smell, and taste, and feel,
Distrust, till Reason sets her seal,
And, by long trains of consequences
Insured, gives sanction to the senses;
Who would not (Heaven forbid it!) waste
One hour in what the world calls Taste,
Nor fondly deign to laugh or cry,
Unless they know some reason why;
With these grave fops, whose system seems
To give up certainty for dreams,
The eye of man is understood
As for no other purpose good
Than as a door, through which, of course,
Their passage crowding, objects force,
A downright usher, to admit
New-comers to the court of Wit:
(Good Gravity! forbear thy spleen;
When I say Wit, I Wisdom mean)
Where (such the practice of the court,
Which legal precedents support)
Not one idea is allow'd
To pass unquestion'd in the crowd,
But ere it can obtain the grace
Of holding in the brain a place,
Before the chief in congregation
Must stand a strict examination.
Not such as those, who physic twirl,
Full fraught with death, from every curl;

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Some Prefer To Keep It Frozen

Honesty can be that one gift received,
To be quickly unwrapped to wear.
With a daring that is flaunted.
And exposing it to everyone,
To prove a truth living within...
Exists and is shown everywhere.

Unfortunately...
Not everyone welcomes this gift to receive.
With a keeping it under wraps.
To pack away in one's attic.
Or...
Stored in one's basement.
To leave it frozen in a freezer,
With a thawing no one will ever see at all.

A shocking honesty and truth can awe.
A shocking honesty and truth can awe.
A shocking honesty and truth can awe.
Some prefer to keep frozen,
Never to thaw.

Honesty can be that one gift received,
To be quickly unwrapped to wear.
With a daring that is flaunted.
And exposing it to everyone,
To prove a truth living within...
Exists and is shown everywhere.

But,
Left corrupted...
A shocking honesty can awe.
To be abducted.
Shocking honesty can awe.
With none conducted.
A shocking honesty can awe.
And...
Leaving it to freeze,
Never to thaw.

A shocking honesty and truth can awe.
A shocking honesty and truth can awe.
A shocking honesty and truth can awe.
Some prefer to keep frozen,
Never to thaw.

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Twin State

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Veterinary Camps

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IV. Tertium Quid

True, Excellency—as his Highness says,
Though she's not dead yet, she's as good as stretched
Symmetrical beside the other two;
Though he's not judged yet, he's the same as judged,
So do the facts abound and superabound:
And nothing hinders that we lift the case
Out of the shade into the shine, allow
Qualified persons to pronounce at last,
Nay, edge in an authoritative word
Between this rabble's-brabble of dolts and fools
Who make up reasonless unreasoning Rome.
"Now for the Trial!" they roar: "the Trial to test
"The truth, weigh husband and weigh wife alike
"I' the scales of law, make one scale kick the beam!"
Law's a machine from which, to please the mob,
Truth the divinity must needs descend
And clear things at the play's fifth act—aha!
Hammer into their noddles who was who
And what was what. I tell the simpletons
"Could law be competent to such a feat
"'T were done already: what begins next week
"Is end o' the Trial, last link of a chain
"Whereof the first was forged three years ago
"When law addressed herself to set wrong right,
"And proved so slow in taking the first step
"That ever some new grievance,—tort, retort,
"On one or the other side,—o'ertook i' the game,
"Retarded sentence, till this deed of death
"Is thrown in, as it were, last bale to boat
"Crammed to the edge with cargo—or passengers?
"'Trecentos inseris: ohe, jam satis est!
"'Huc appelle!'—passengers, the word must be."
Long since, the boat was loaded to my eyes.
To hear the rabble and brabble, you'd call the case
Fused and confused past human finding out.
One calls the square round, t' other the round square—
And pardonably in that first surprise
O' the blood that fell and splashed the diagram:
But now we've used our eyes to the violent hue
Can't we look through the crimson and trace lines?
It makes a man despair of history,
Eusebius and the established fact—fig's end!
Oh, give the fools their Trial, rattle away
With the leash of lawyers, two on either side—
One barks, one bites,—Masters Arcangeli
And Spreti,—that's the husband's ultimate hope
Against the Fisc and the other kind of Fisc,
Bound to do barking for the wife: bow—wow!
Why, Excellency, we and his Highness here
Would settle the matter as sufficiently

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V. Count Guido Franceschini

Thanks, Sir, but, should it please the reverend Court,
I feel I can stand somehow, half sit down
Without help, make shift to even speak, you see,
Fortified by the sip of … why, 't is wine,
Velletri,—and not vinegar and gall,
So changed and good the times grow! Thanks, kind Sir!
Oh, but one sip's enough! I want my head
To save my neck, there's work awaits me still.
How cautious and considerate … aie, aie, aie,
Nor your fault, sweet Sir! Come, you take to heart
An ordinary matter. Law is law.
Noblemen were exempt, the vulgar thought,
From racking; but, since law thinks otherwise,
I have been put to the rack: all's over now,
And neither wrist—what men style, out of joint:
If any harm be, 't is the shoulder-blade,
The left one, that seems wrong i' the socket,—Sirs,
Much could not happen, I was quick to faint,
Being past my prime of life, and out of health.
In short, I thank you,—yes, and mean the word.
Needs must the Court be slow to understand
How this quite novel form of taking pain,
This getting tortured merely in the flesh,
Amounts to almost an agreeable change
In my case, me fastidious, plied too much
With opposite treatment, used (forgive the joke)
To the rasp-tooth toying with this brain of mine,
And, in and out my heart, the play o' the probe.
Four years have I been operated on
I' the soul, do you see—its tense or tremulous part—
My self-respect, my care for a good name,
Pride in an old one, love of kindred—just
A mother, brothers, sisters, and the like,
That looked up to my face when days were dim,
And fancied they found light there—no one spot,
Foppishly sensitive, but has paid its pang.
That, and not this you now oblige me with,
That was the Vigil-torment, if you please!
The poor old noble House that drew the rags
O' the Franceschini's once superb array
Close round her, hoped to slink unchallenged by,—
Pluck off these! Turn the drapery inside out
And teach the tittering town how scarlet wears!
Show men the lucklessness, the improvidence
Of the easy-natured Count before this Count,
The father I have some slight feeling for,
Who let the world slide, nor foresaw that friends
Then proud to cap and kiss their patron's shoe,
Would, when the purse he left held spider-webs,
Properly push his child to wall one day!

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