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Edgar Degas

Painting is easy when you don't know how, but very difficult when you do.

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You don't know how to be in love

You don't know how to be in love
You don't know how to be in love
I try to kiss you
You say not today
I try to hug you
You say 'no way'

You don't know how to be in love
You don't know how to be in love
I wanna be with you
You got somethin else to do
I try to be near you
You say i'm a fool

You don't know how to be in love
You don't know how to be in love
I could say a lot
None of it would be true
You don't love me i know
The way i love you

You don't know how to be in love
You don't know how to be in love

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Love, You Don't know how Much

Hugs, kisses, and tearful goodbyes
going to be many miles apart
whether long or short trips
a picture of you in a purse or wallet
a reminder how beautiful in love with you
your smile makes the heck it journey more pleasant
thinking of you brings romantic memories
from the first time we met, our wedding dance
holding hands on a walk
so far away your are, but so close in my heart
till we meet again i hear your voice by phone
so soft and sweet, it brings tears of happiness
how special you are to me
you don't know how deep in love I am with you
no distance can keep me from you
our love grows stronger by the day
wait to hold you, to love you, to be with you
you don't know how much you really mean to me
as the miles grow closer and the time ticking by
I know I will be forever in love with you.
across the way as I arrive to see your beautiful body
the smile.the tears, the movement of you lips
saying I miss you and love you so
the big tight hug, the twirling of us together
tears of love and togetherness
you don't know how much in I am in love with you

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I Don't Know How I Got By

How did I wake up each day
Before that moment I saw your face
Where was I before your touch
No where is where I was, without you
Without you in it
My life was just a lie
Before you I don't know how I got by
Before I met you
Before I held you in the night
I don't know how I survived
Before I found you
Before you made everything right
I was half alive
I wasn't really living till you came into my life
I got through baby
But I don't know how I got by
How did I get through those nights
Before that moment I held you tight
And where was I before your kiss
And how did I exist without you
Life had no meaning
No reason and no rhyme
And before you I don't know how I got by
Before I met you
Before I held you in the night
I don't know how I survived
Before I found you
Before you made everything right
I was half alive
I wasn't really living till you came into my life
I got through baby
But I don't know how I got by
I thank God when I wake each day
Awaking next to you
Don't know what I was living for
Before you, before you ohhhhh
Before I met you
Before I held you in the night
I don't know how I survived
Before I found you
Before you made everything right
I was half alive
I wasn't really living till you came into my life
I got through baby
But I don't know how I got by
Before I met you
I don't know how I got by

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Easy Once You Know How

Oh well it's much too early, not right now,
How can i love you when i, i don't know how,
I don't know how, i don't know how ?
How can i trust my eyes, do they really see
What is the truth ? it's hard for me,
Hard for me, hard for me.
It's hard to understand what's really there,
When all my hopes they just cloud the air,
Cloud the air, cloud the air.
Love is all around me, till we understand
It's easy to see baby, but talk to me.
And love is all around us if we could be free
Love is all around us if we just, if we just try to see.
Ooh wah ooh
Ooh wah ooh
Ooh wah ooh
Ooh wah ooh
Ah.
You say you need me, baby, as you breathe the words,
That's time for you to leave, oh no!
Time to leave, time to leave.
Oh please, don't push me, baby, i might learn how to play your game,
Now it's your turn,
It's your turn, it's your turn.
I'd love to love you now till i'll be sure
That this time your love won't hurt me more,
Hurt me more, hurt me more, oh, come on!
I think i'll go now, yeah you're always gonna break me my heart,
And i see i gotta go now, honey i just wanna say
Oh you're breaking my heart right now baby,
Oh you're breaking my heart now now now,
Now i don't wanna hurt you, no no no no,
And i don't wanna hold you, yeah!
I need a twenty-four hour man,
So when you love me all night long
I need a twenty-four hour man,
Honey, where are you ?
But doesn't really matter when i need you so
It doesn't really matter, tell me yes or no.
It doesn't really matter, babe i got to know
It doesn't really matter, this is love,
I just love to love you, ah ooh!

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I Don't Know If You Knew

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I feel happy
Remembering those fun moments we had together
How it would bring me joy to make you laugh
To make you smile - Bright up your day
How I would enjoy seeing you every day
Having long conversations together
How it would please me to pleasure you
Make you feel like a queen - Treat you like royalty

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I yearn
Remembering that amazing friendship we shared
Shocked at how horridly it suddenly ended
Shocked at how cold you treated me
I yearn for that strong friendship we shared
Like no other - Like every other
I sometimes ask myself why it is that I still do
After finding out your true self
I guess I'm just a fool - Loved you too much

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I feel love
Thinking of you - Your beauty
Feeling that there's no other girl out there
Which could ever replace you
Or one to share the same love I share for you
I don't know why I loved you so much
Or is it love? - I just don't know any more

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I try to negotiate
Thinking that I could change
Change for the better
Become the man you want me to be
Get in shape - Be more fancy
Maybe one day you'd come to realise
That you've made a terrible mistake
And that one day, you'll want to make amends

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I feel confused
Not knowing whether I still feel for you
But in the end knowing that deep down
I never stopped loving you - Caring for you
I try to tell others that I stopped loving you
Sometimes I even try to fool myself that I just don't care
But it's hard to fool your own heart - Possibly impossible

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I feel in denial
Feeling that there's still a chance
I could still fix things - I'd think
It's not too late - I'd assure myself
We could still be close - As friends, of course
I could supress my feelings for you
It's ok - I'd do anything for you

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I feel hate
Remembering all the sacrifices I made for you
How unappreciative you were, are
I cant believe I fell for you
I'd love to know what I saw in you
Never have I been able to explain
Not to me - Not to anyone
I wish you had just acted cold from the start
Instead of leading me on for so long
What a fool I was, am

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I feel sad
Sad that I never lived up to your expectations
Sad that I could never be the man you wanted
The man of your dreams - Your fantasies
Remembering the times when I was wrong
Causing you to feel sad - Disappointing you
But in the end there was nothing I could do
I just wasn't good enough for you

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I feel forgiveness
Forgiving you for the way you treated me
How you handled the situation - Handled me
You just don't know how to handle these situations
Guys who have feelings for you - Or better yet,
Are madly in love with you - You just don't know
But it's ok - I'd say to myself
It's not your fault - I forgive you

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I feel regret
Remembering the first day I ever met you
Wishing I could just go back
Reversing everything that happened
Stopping me from going through this pain
Avoiding getting my heart crushed like no other
Not having to spend every day
Wishing that I never felt for you
Wishing that I had never fallen for you

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
Sometimes I feel angry
Remembering the way you treated me after
How furious it would make me
Knowing that what we had was all over
Sometimes I wouldn't be able to help it
The anger just gets to me
Sometimes I scream - Sometimes I swear
Sometimes I hit things - Sometimes I throw them

I don't know if you knew
But sometimes I think of you
I guess I've been thinking about you a lot
It's already been seven weeks
I don't know why I've been counting
But I guess I have
But I guess you know that by now

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You Don't Know It

You don't know it, but I
do,
One day, I fell in love with
you.
It happened so quickly,
at a glance,
I did'nt even have a
chance, to resist you.
You don't know it, but I do,
I keep having flashbacks
of you.
In my mind, I see you there,
I tried hard, not to stare.
The rain was falling, sky
was gray,
There had been a brighter
day.
You don't know it, but I do,
I never thought this could
be true.
That's why I'm putting this
in a rhyme,
Filling up my space, and
time.
You don't know it, but I do.
I'll hold you in my heart,
Till I can hold you.
In this journey, along the
way,
I've found something special,
I don't want it to go away. .

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You Just Don't Know

You just don't know
How much I care for you
There is no way
That I can put into words
About the way that
I feel right now
Maybe one day
I will figure out how
It isn't important
To me about what
People think
For something
That has never been
Seen is thought of
As unique
Feelings don't have to be
Those that are sexually
People can sometimes
Place too much focus on a friendship
Of one between
A man and woman
Actually
The only thing that I want
Is for you to be happy
I don't want you with me
I place a heavy price
One someone that I
Call a friend
I will be here
Until the end
Which ever woman
That you chose
She had better
Do all that she can do
To please you
Because you deserve the best
Nothing less
Her whole objective
Had better be
Giving her all without any stress
This is what I pray
That happens
For you to be
Forever Blessed! ! ! ! !

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Because You Do Not Know How To Say Yes....

do not make a conclusion that you are wrong
or that you are inferior

you know best who you are, keep thinking,

when you were rejected
by whose standards?
and under what circumstances?
yes, theirs, and their
network of evil influences
this company incorporated
a root system of cajolery
and mediocrity

keep that dignity, do not expect, do not demand,
stay what you are, you know best who you are

your nights have been days, your craft well honed by sacrifices,
you have been an expert listener and talker to yourself
you have mastered right from wrong, you have fathomed the
code of silence, the ethics of your profession

your efforts since when must be rewarded?
ah, you started so young to be disciplined
you shy away from shallowness, embraced the loneliness of time
burning hair with your candles, whetting what is metallic and
glossing over the gold that is found in you
you are a true value, an epitome of virtue,
the ripe fruit of the grape vine,
the moon on the river.

ah, they are mud, and how can they ever like the true pearl
the nugget of gold beneath their stinking waters?

now do not blame yourself,
you are the best,
the true winner of this
game,
they all have their friends,
they are drunk with their lies and power,
they had their secret meetings and their talks
they have the strings of the marionettes in their hands
they are garbage on the cans

they will tell the truth....
you could have won
you are the best,
but you just don't know how to say yes
too all of them.

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I Don't Know

Well I can't take this any longer
well I can't be this anymore
well I'm not getting any stronger
I don't know how to feel this anymore

[Chorus]
well you can tell me what you want
after all that you've done for me
we can't make it all undone
can't you see that
I don't know what to think
and you can't tell me we're dreaming
I wish that I could just let this go
what I'm thinking
I don't know what I'm feeling
we just need space for breathing
I wish that I could just let this go
what I'm thinking but I don't know

It happen such a thousand times before
I'm up agianst a wall I can't ignore
I wish you didn't feel so good to hold
cause then it wouldn't be so hard to know

[chorus]

I wish I could tell you that everything
was gonna be alright
I just wanna love you so maybe I
can let this go

[chorus]

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I Don't Know Why

This is one of those moments
When all that really matters
Is crystal clear
We are woven together
By whatever threads of life that have
Brought us here
We are stripped of all our layers
We are getting to the core
Tell me something real
And nothing more
Cuz I don't know why
I don't know how
I don't know where
Baby all I know is love
So I'm here between the bookends
Of everything that was and What will be
There's a wealth of information
Not so many answers
It seems to me
So I face the unfamiliar
And nothing's clear
Only blinding faith can carry me can carry me from here
And I don't know why
I don't know how
I don't know where
Baby all I know is love
Hold my hand and hold this moment
Time sure feels precious don't it
Life is always changing
This I know
I don't know why
I don't know how
I don't know where
Baby all I know is now
Baby all I know is now

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Playa - Missy Elliott

Missy] Yeahhayyy, yeahhh
[Havoc] Yeah, uh-huh
[Missy] Yah..
[Missy] Yeahhayyy, yeahhayyy!
[Havoc] Yeah.. fo' sho'
[Missy] Yeahh! Yah..
[Missy] Mmmm-mmm-mmm, mmmm-mmm-mmm
[Missy] Uhh, yah..
[Havoc] M-O-B-B baby
[Missy] Wooooooooo!
[Missy] Uhhhh..
[Havoc] Yeah! Right
[Missy] Uhhhh..
[Havoc] Let's do this, one time baby
[Missy] Uhhhh..
[Havoc] Yea-yea
[Missy] Yah..
[Havoc] Yo
[Verse 1 Havoc]
Whattup ma, the name H doe, I'm into pesos
V.I.P. and champagne by the caseloads
Doubles get you from that bar, and get you right
Or get you bent, whatever you like
I'm not into wifin - no sir
I just wanna beat it up, hear the kitty-cat purr
The whip or the tail, whichever you prefer
The crib off limits, got wifey durr
Got a man home beast, then be easy ma
She don't know how to creep, I be teachin ma
I got jars of that haze, yeah I'll show you how to twist
Get it tight but not too tight, it's all in the lick
I'll show you which end to burn, how to spot that trick
All you need is the will to learn
.. and some good trees to burn
Relax, you'll be straight like a perm, word
[Chorus: Missy]
I need a man, who's up on his game
And can give me some affection, satisfy me many ways
Are you the one to do it for me playa?
(Are you the one to do it for me playa?)
Then maybe I can hook up witcha later
[Verse 2 Prodigy]
Babe girl you now rockin with strength, Infamous Thugs is nuttin to slug
Anyone, they try to ruin our fun
I don't wanna scare you away, I'm sayin whassup
Tell your friends come over here, and party with us
If y'all from the hood, y'all gon' love our ways
Cause we got money, and we still the same way
Go 'head, do that dance, and you can feel free
To be you and just do you, everything's great
Yeah tonight we gon' have a little too much to drink
Just leave your car in the lot, so you can feel safe
We gon' party 'til six then take it to my place
Then later on I'll have a car bring you back safe
I ain't into games, I'll give it to you straight
We can have a part time love, I just want it straight
Really doe, I changed doe, not no dames
So however you wanna call it, it's okay
[Chorus]
[Verse 3 Nelly]
Uhh, uhh, aiy
Check it, check it, check it
Baby girl right here is where you need to be
You better duck cause the bottles pop easily
Go and get your other friends, cause you comin with me
Derrty E-N-T with the M-O-B
See, no respect for the +Country Grammar+
So I kick the Dunn language, the response was better
We like, 'Dunn' did it, 'Dunn' hit it, 'Dunn' split it
Everything hon wanted, Dunn was with it
She like to see me doo-rag'd and me ball-cap'd
She like to see me tailored, Gator'd, slacked
In fact, I see you lookin through the windshield wipers
As the rain hit the windows on the blue Dodge Viper
The sniper, not never but hit ya from long range
Check it, got haters like X had Brother Baines
Used to have quarter thangs but now I got quarter games
Got a quarter of a movie, here come {?} trains
[Verse 4 Missy]
I'm not tryin to be your girlfriend (you dig)
I ain't even tryin to lock you in
There's no need for us to pretend
I'd rather spend yo' dividends
You and me can be lover friends
I'd rather keep this between us two
Let me know when you wanna begin
And let me tell you what I want from you
[Chorus]

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Playa

Missy] Yeahhayyy, yeahhh
[Havoc] Yeah, uh-huh
[Missy] Yah..
[Missy] Yeahhayyy, yeahhayyy!
[Havoc] Yeah.. fo' sho'
[Missy] Yeahh! Yah..
[Missy] Mmmm-mmm-mmm, mmmm-mmm-mmm
[Missy] Uhh, yah..
[Havoc] M-O-B-B baby
[Missy] Wooooooooo!
[Missy] Uhhhh..
[Havoc] Yeah! Right
[Missy] Uhhhh..
[Havoc] Let's do this, one time baby
[Missy] Uhhhh..
[Havoc] Yea-yea
[Missy] Yah..
[Havoc] Yo
[Verse 1 Havoc]
Whattup ma, the name H doe, I'm into pesos
V.I.P. and champagne by the caseloads
Doubles get you from that bar, and get you right
Or get you bent, whatever you like
I'm not into wifin - no sir
I just wanna beat it up, hear the kitty-cat purr
The whip or the tail, whichever you prefer
The crib off limits, got wifey durr
Got a man home beast, then be easy ma
She don't know how to creep, I be teachin ma
I got jars of that haze, yeah I'll show you how to twist
Get it tight but not too tight, it's all in the lick
I'll show you which end to burn, how to spot that trick
All you need is the will to learn
.. and some good trees to burn
Relax, you'll be straight like a perm, word
[Chorus: Missy]
I need a man, who's up on his game
And can give me some affection, satisfy me many ways
Are you the one to do it for me playa?
(Are you the one to do it for me playa?)
Then maybe I can hook up witcha later
[Verse 2 Prodigy]
Babe girl you now rockin with strength, Infamous Thugs is nuttin to slug
Anyone, they try to ruin our fun
I don't wanna scare you away, I'm sayin whassup
Tell your friends come over here, and party with us
If y'all from the hood, y'all gon' love our ways
Cause we got money, and we still the same way
Go 'head, do that dance, and you can feel free
To be you and just do you, everything's great
Yeah tonight we gon' have a little too much to drink
Just leave your car in the lot, so you can feel safe
We gon' party 'til six then take it to my place
Then later on I'll have a car bring you back safe
I ain't into games, I'll give it to you straight
We can have a part time love, I just want it straight
Really doe, I changed doe, not no dames
So however you wanna call it, it's okay
[Chorus]
[Verse 3 Nelly]
Uhh, uhh, aiy
Check it, check it, check it
Baby girl right here is where you need to be
You better duck cause the bottles pop easily
Go and get your other friends, cause you comin with me
Derrty E-N-T with the M-O-B
See, no respect for the +Country Grammar+
So I kick the Dunn language, the response was better
We like, 'Dunn' did it, 'Dunn' hit it, 'Dunn' split it
Everything hon wanted, Dunn was with it
She like to see me doo-rag'd and me ball-cap'd
She like to see me tailored, Gator'd, slacked
In fact, I see you lookin through the windshield wipers
As the rain hit the windows on the blue Dodge Viper
The sniper, not never but hit ya from long range
Check it, got haters like X had Brother Baines
Used to have quarter thangs but now I got quarter games
Got a quarter of a movie, here come {?} trains
[Verse 4 Missy]
I'm not tryin to be your girlfriend (you dig)
I ain't even tryin to lock you in
There's no need for us to pretend
I'd rather spend yo' dividends
You and me can be lover friends
I'd rather keep this between us two
Let me know when you wanna begin
And let me tell you what I want from you
[Chorus]

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Before You Break My Heart

I guess I should go now,
Though I don't know how;
But this time I have to be smart.
I have to end it all;
Before you break my heart.

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I See An Open Doorway

When you ask me 'what line of work are you in now',
and i reply that i don't actually receive a wage,
I wish i could explain but i don't know how,
but I know I'm too young for retirement at my age.

i'm unfit to work, i know it doesn't show,
forgive me if i don't justify my existence,
it's a battle to stop an unhealthy feeling grow,
please don't feed an already guilty conscience.

I keep myself busy, with the down and needy,
it gives me a reason, so i do what i can,
please don't say these people aren't in difficulty,
you just devalue, everything that i am.

i feel marginalised by society now,
labelled 'good for nothing' or worse,
i don't need a job to define me anyhow,
i now consider a gift, what i considered a curse.

because i know what it is that defines me,
it's not where i exchange hard earned time for pay,
it has been a while, but i'm beginning to see,
what once was a barrier, is now an open doorway.

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I Thought You Knew

I thought You knew, guess I assumed to much
I don't know how, but now wheir so far out of touch
And I never planned, to so miss understand
But what you needed, you never asked me to give
And I swear as I live...
I thought you knew my heart was yours
And that we were so together
That we, would always be
I don't believe, you leavin' me is the answer
I'm not askin' you to let me rush back in and fail again
I'm askin' for one chance, not to assume
So I can say and do all the things I thought you knew
So far wheir still so far
From where we know we should be
I'm searching for words
And you haven't heard
I thought you knew my heart was yours
And that we were so together
That we, would always be
I don't believe, you leavin' me is the answer
I'm not askin' you to let me rush back in and fail again
I'm askin' for one chance, not to assume
So I can say and do all the things I thought you knew
I thought you knew
Ohhhhhh god I thought you knew!

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Don't Know How (Not To Love You)

i learn to live alone and move on with my life. theres a million things
that i can do that i can pride my time. i can wake each morning i can
go about my day i can bumble through my words until i find a few to
say. but the hardest thing i had to do scince we been apart is
learning how to deal with all this pain inside my heart.
chorus
cuz i dont know how dont know how dont know how not to love u
dont know how dont know how dony know how not to love u.
i can work all day and i can hang out everynight i can do the wrong
things and pretend that they're all right. i can make believe that
everything is cool and put all the things that covers a life of a fool
chorus
u said that time would lease the pain but i still give voice whisper
my name scince u been gone my worlds been still u said i'd forget
but i never will.
chorus
i can write a song and make the whole world laugh and cry. i can
use some words to paint a picture to put inside ur mind. i can use
my hands to whipe the dust off this guitar. and let the music that
i'm playing take my mind off my heart.
chorus
u said that time would lease the pain but i still give voice whisper
my name. scince u been gone my worlds been still u said i'd forget
but i never will.
chorus 2 times

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Wounded

Is it not strange? A year ago to-day,
With scarce a thought beyond the hum-drum round,
I did my decent job and earned my pay;
Was averagely happy, I'll be bound.
Ay, in my little groove I was content,
Seeing my life run smoothly to the end,
With prosy days in stolid labour spent,
And jolly nights, a pipe, a glass, a friend.
In God's good time a hearth fire's cosy gleam,
A wife and kids, and all a fellow needs;
When presto! like a bubble goes my dream:
I leap upon the Stage of Splendid Deeds.
I yell with rage; I wallow deep in gore:
I, that was clerk in a drysalter's store.

Stranger than any book I've ever read.
Here on the reeking battlefield I lie,
Under the stars, propped up with smeary dead,
Like too, if no one takes me in, to die.
Hit on the arms, legs, liver, lungs and gall;
Damn glad there's nothing more of me to hit;
But calm, and feeling never pain at all,
And full of wonder at the turn of it.
For of the dead around me three are mine,
Three foemen vanquished in the whirl of fight;
So if I die I have no right to whine,
I feel I've done my little bit all right.
I don't know how -- but there the beggars are,
As dead as herrings pickled in a jar.

And here am I, worse wounded than I thought;
For in the fight a bullet bee-like stings;
You never heed; the air is metal-hot,
And all alive with little flicking wings.
But on you charge. You see the fellows fall;
Your pal was by your side, fair fighting-mad;
You turn to him, and lo! no pal at all;
You wonder vaguely if he's copped it bad.
But on you charge. The heavens vomit death;
And vicious death is besoming the ground.
You're blind with sweat; you're dazed, and out of breath,
And though you yell, you cannot hear a sound.
But on you charge. Oh, War's a rousing game!
Around you smoky clouds like ogres tower;
The earth is rowelled deep with spurs of flame,
And on your helmet stones and ashes shower.
But on you charge. It's odd! You have no fear.
Machine-gun bullets whip and lash your path;
Red, yellow, black the smoky giants rear;
The shrapnel rips, the heavens roar in wrath.
But on you charge. Barbed wire all trampled down.
The ground all gored and rent as by a blast;
Grim heaps of grey where once were heaps of brown;
A ragged ditch -- the Hun first line at last.
All smashed to hell. Their second right ahead,
So on you charge. There's nothing else to do.
More reeking holes, blood, barbed wire, gruesome dead;
(Your puttee strap's undone -- that worries you).
You glare around. You think you're all alone.
But no; your chums come surging left and right.
The nearest chap flops down without a groan,
His face still snarling with the rage of fight.
Ha! here's the second trench -- just like the first,
Only a little more so, more "laid out";
More pounded, flame-corroded, death-accurst;
A pretty piece of work, beyond a doubt.
Now for the third, and there your job is done,
So on you charge. You never stop to think.
Your cursed puttee's trailing as you run;
You feel you'd sell your soul to have a drink.
The acrid air is full of cracking whips.
You wonder how it is you're going still.
You foam with rage. Oh, God! to be at grips
With someone you can rush and crush and kill.
Your sleeve is dripping blood; you're seeing red;
You're battle-mad; your turn is coming now.
See! there's the jagged barbed wire straight ahead,
And there's the trench -- you'll get there anyhow.
Your puttee catches on a strand of wire,
And down you go; perhaps it saves your life,
For over sandbag rims you see 'em fire,
Crop-headed chaps, their eyes ablaze with strife.
You crawl, you cower; then once again you plunge
With all your comrades roaring at your heels.
Have at 'em lads! You stab, you jab, you lunge;
A blaze of glory, then the red world reels.
A crash of triumph, then . . . you're faint a bit . . .
That cursed puttee! Now to fasten it. . . .

Well, that's the charge. And now I'm here alone.
I've built a little wall of Hun on Hun,
To shield me from the leaden bees that drone
(It saves me worry, and it hurts 'em none).
The only thing I'm wondering is when
Some stretcher-men will stroll along my way?
It isn't much that's left of me, but then
Where life is, hope is, so at least they say.
Well, if I'm spared I'll be the happy lad.
I tell you I won't envy any king.
I've stood the racket, and I'm proud and glad;
I've had my crowning hour. Oh, War's the thing!
It gives us common, working chaps our chance,
A taste of glory, chivalry, romance.

Ay, War, they say, is hell; it's heaven, too.
It lets a man discover what he's worth.
It takes his measure, shows what he can do,
Gives him a joy like nothing else on earth.
It fans in him a flame that otherwise
Would flicker out, these drab, discordant days;
It teaches him in pain and sacrifice
Faith, fortitude, grim courage past all praise.
Yes, War is good. So here beside my slain,
A happy wreck I wait amid the din;
For even if I perish mine's the gain. . . .
Hi, there, you fellows! won't you take me in?
Give me a fag to smoke upon the way. . . .
We've taken La Boiselle! The hell, you say!
Well, that would make a corpse sit up and grin. . . .
Lead on! I'll live to fight another day.

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The Battle To Close My Eyes

I shut my eyes and shut them tight
This doesn't feel right
This can't be right

Why do you close your eyes?
What do you think you can do?
You think everything will just come to you?
This doesn't feel right
It can't be right

Shut my eyes harder
Close my ears
I cant hear
I cant see
This doesn't feel right
How can it be right?

Don't stop
Don't open
Don't give up
Don't
Just don't
This feels wrong
How could this pain be right?

Hey, hey you open your eyes
Stop it, I cannot
Boy, you're a fool open your eyes! You're not blind
You're your own man!
Boy live your life
Open your eyes, what can you find as you are?
This hurts
Do I trust what I feel or do I do what I know?

Boy you can't find her like this
Boy you're stubborn and puritanical
Boy you don't know a thing about life
Boy you're a fool
Don't be foolish
You, you're, you're wrong
NO! You're wrong, look at yourself you're a mess
This doesn't feel right
It can't be right

Boy you said it yourself this ISNT right
You were MADE to feel this way
This, THIS is who you are
Don't run from destiny
Stop hiding behind your excuses
Will you just sit here and wait?
Is that what He would will?
Does He love to see you suffer like this? Doesn't He LOVE you? !
No, no, I won't trust my feelings, but this doesn't feel right
It can't be right

How can you find her when your eyes are closed
How can you grow with your hands tied behind your back
Don't you understand grace?
Don't you understandd love?
Must I teach in these simple doctrines
How far have fallen my son
Boy you're just a boy, a spiritual babe.
Stop making excuses you're not even waiting
It baffles you so easily decieve yourself

Boy, accept your destiny
Become who you are
NO!
I will wait
I will save everything for her!
I, I......
And how is that going for you?
These feelings, if you're not made for them, then what are you?

Unfaithful
Unloyal
Unloving
Unab le
You're waiting? ! HAH you're impatient
And how is it going for you?

You call that love? !
You call that devotion? !
Will she be pleased that you 'waited'
You gave your heart to so many, what will she think?
You can't do this, you cannot succeed without Christ, you know that
You cannot suceed He isn't with you, because you're wrong

Is this idea of purity? !
Is this your idea of faithfulness? !
Is this your idea of WAITING
You cannot do this
And apparently, boy, you're too weak and proud to take rebuke

Why won't you learn? !
OPEN YOUR EYES
You should not do this
Remember your first love

OPEN YOUR EYES
STOP WAITING
GO!

NO! I won't do it, you're wrong it's.... it's all lies
This, this is how it's supposed to be
I will seek God
I will close my eyes
I will not open them
I will not search
I will wait
I,
I will
I will do
I will do what
I will do what He
I will do what He wills.
Seek ye first the kingdo.... FOOL! You pretend to know His will? !

Foolish and naive CHILD, you are full of sin
Fool you are a lustful being
Fool you compromised with sin and it's taking you over
You fool do you know nothing of scripture
When you burn with passion it is better that you marry!
FOOL, do you know nothing of devotion
I'd rather you sin than be luke-warm
You fool you pretend to know HIM
You fool you pretend to love HIM
You pretend to serve HIM
but I KNOW who you are
I know who you REALLY are inside
Your heart is evil, you're wicked!

No, no I'm righteous!

Righteous? Romans 3: 23 kid
You're not righteous
You're a sinner
You're drowning in your sin
Drowning in your lust
You cannot do this
You cannot win
Stop acting apart from Him
Enjoy your life
Enjoy the gift He gave you
Why do you squander this? !
Why do you hate yourself?
I think I know
You're not living how you were made to live
Where is your joy?
You have taken it away with your petty rules
With your religious nonsense that makes you believe that
You cannot love
And in doing so
You
You have become
WICKED

No for there is no longer any condemnation for those who are in Christ!

You think that's a valid response YOU FOOL
There is a cup of wrath reserved for adulterers like you
What makes you think you're in Christ?
What makes you think you're saved? !
Judge a man by his fruit
Your fruit
If you can call it fruit
Is lust, evil, desire, wickedness, self-loathing, cynicism, doubt
You make yourself drunk with your sins
You attempt to recompense with Christian clubs
You feel better by memorizing verses
But you're evil
You cannot hide from your sin
You're not repenting
Come back

NO you're wrong I repented God loves me? !

You did not repent, your actions would change
I bet you that you lusted while having this conversation
You're not loved

You're a liar from satan God ALWAYS love us.

Your lack of faith, understanding, and wisdom is baffling to me.
Don't you know that your sins make you far from the Lord
How can He give you His love when your sin is in the way
No you're too far gone
I see you're too stubborn to receive this rebuke
I'm praying for you

No you're wrong
God does not condemn me
God loves me no matter what!
You're wrong I will wait for her with all of my heart

(So that's why you lust, every month, every week, every night)

SHUT UP, you cannot buldgeon me with my failures
I'm a new creation in Christ

Are you? Are you really? you? ! lustful, you? ! sinful, you? ! stubborn
You? ! of all people

No In the NAME OF JESUS CHRIST GO AWAY
I will wait for her, God will give me the strength
My failures do not define who I am
He has given me an identity you cannot shake
No one can
I'm more than my lust, I'm a son of the one true God
He does not condemn me because I'm covered in His blood
In His love and grace
You're wrong
I will wait with all of my heart
I will not lose heart
I will continue steadfastly I will act as Isaac did
I will 'Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness
I trust that 'all else shall be added unto me.' I take hold of that
That promise
I will wait on you Lord
Thank you for giving me peace
Thank you for taking away the condemnation
But Lord that evil, that came from me
That's what I am inside
I don't know how you love me
But I know you do
Teach me to be more like you
I don't want to a murderer anymore
I don't want to hate myself
I don't want to be an adulterer anymore
I want you to take all the lust away
Maybe not yet
Maybe I don't know how
But someday
God I barely know what I'm saying
But I love you
I'm sorry I'm not okay with waiting
Please change my heart
I want to serve you
But I also..... I also want her
God you made me to have feelings....
But why now?
I dont think I can handle it
But I
....Somewhere in this doubt
Somewhere amidist self condemnation I trust... I trust you
With you can I handle it
So I guess I'll wait
Dear God I love you
There's rocks God
God they're sharp
I think I'll lose my way
The path is narrow
I'll never find it like this
God these are my doubts
But I love you
God I'm
I'm closing..........
GOD GIVE MY STERNGTH
Please..... please.... PLEASE HEAR ME!

God..... God.... I'm, I will, I, ..... I will
Just lead me
I need you
.....

God

I'm closing my eyes now.

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I Have It

I always wondered why so many weird things happen in the world.Is it fate, or Magick.This isnt one of my better poems but..here goes

Some call it Magick
The things I see
And I don't understand it
Why it happens to me
Some call it Magick
And I don't know how
But I know that I have it
And it all works out


When I try to live,
When I try to Believe,
When everything seems
to be alive,
I have my Lucky stars
Fate as it may be

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Mysterious Moggy

If you know anything at all
You'll know that they were born for sleeping!
Curled tightly up in a little ball
Cautiously keeping
The secret of their feline soul
From humankind like you and me
Who pry and poke and do not understand
That in their spirits they are free
And will not answer any demand
But keep their cat integrity.
They know we will fulfil their wishes,
Plying them with the most sumptuous dishes -
Can't you see we're simply their slaves
And this is the way the feline behaves?

My cat deserves my full attention
Despite her air of condescension,
I don't know how, but secretly
She's made a little pet mouse of me! !

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