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The Absence

i have long waited
for this time
when
you cannot seduce
me anymore
like no matter what
you do
whether you spread
your legs
at 180 degrees
or lick the muscles of my
legs for
a day
all these
cannot cause a tremor
to my
layered existence

i have long waited for this
time
when i become a wall
and you wilt
as a vine
when you are but a
forgotten tendril still
fighting for a hold
in my trellis

now that time has come
and i am calling some of my friend
to dine and drink with me
and we had
a good time
recalling what you have done
to me

i told them you ruined me
and i was like a house that fell down
on the ground
dynamited

and then they all left me
when the wine is all consumed
when the food is nothing
but left-overs for the dog

now it is just me and my dog
and then the dog is asleep on the rug
beside a door
that i have not closed

somehow, i am back to this emptiness again
and i still wonder
how can i ever be a void to be filled again

like an empty glass still wishing for
the pouring of
the old wine

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