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Economy
"There's nothing like economy,"
I heard a chap remark,
Who, judging by his tout ensemble,
Had issued from the ark.
He was a most peculiar man,
With visage wan and thin,
And liquid drops of amber hue
A-trickling down his chin.
"They tell us it's extravagant,"
He added with a shrug,
As he deposited a quid
Within his spacious "mug," —
"They tell us it's extravagant,
This ' chewing of the weed;'
But only use ' economy,'
You'll never be in need.
"And this is how to practise it:
Chew your tobacco well,
Using a little at a time,—
It nat'rally will swell;
"Then take the quid and dry it, sir!"—
'Twas thus the fellow spoke,—
"And, when you want a quiet whiff,
Put in your pipe, and smoke.
"And, stranger, after doing this,
If you are fond of snuff,
The ashes that are left behind
Will serve you well enough.
"And thus," said this peculiar man
(I fear he did but joke,)
"If you will follow my advice,
It will not end in smoke."
poem
by
Charles Follen Adams
from
Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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